Work— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Improve grammatical accuracy and fluency by avoiding filler words and redundant phrases. Use a clear topic sentence and support it with concise, relevant details. For example, avoid repeating 'uh' and restructure sentences for clarity.

Example: I currently work as a receptionist, which is a rewarding job because I enjoy helping customers. For example, I provide accurate information to help them enjoy their travels. I find this work very meaningful.

Suggestion: Focus on grammatical correctness and clarity. Use linking words to connect ideas logically. Provide specific details without repetition or incomplete sentences.

Example: I work at a hotel located near Tokyo and Shinjuku stations, close to Tokyo Skytree. Many tourists from different countries stay at my hotel, which allows me to meet people from around the world.

Suggestion: Improve sentence structure and coherence by using appropriate linking words. Avoid incomplete sentences and clarify your points with specific examples.

Example: I think it's a great place to work because my coworkers are friendly. Additionally, I can practice English daily since many foreign customers visit the hotel. The hotel also has a unique design, which I find interesting to learn about.

Suggestion: Avoid filler words and repetition. Use clear and complete sentences with appropriate linking words. Provide specific examples to support your opinion.

Example: I like the place where I work because there are many shops nearby. For lunch, I have many options. For example, I often go to a Gyudon restaurant, which is famous and affordable in Japan.

Suggestion: Work on sentence clarity and grammar. Use linking words to organize your ideas logically. Avoid repetition and incomplete sentences. Be specific about your plans.

Example: My future plan is to work as an architect in Canada. Therefore, I need to attend university there to study architecture, which I find enjoyable. After graduating, I hope to gain experience through an internship.

× I'm currently work as a receptionist, so which is really rewarding job because I like to helping customers, uh, such as, uh, for example, I get some correct information for them to, uh, for them to, uh, let them enjoy their life, their travel.

✓ I'm currently working as a receptionist, which is a really rewarding job because I like helping customers, for example, I provide correct information to help them enjoy their life and their travel.

The verb 'work' should be in the present continuous form 'working' to indicate an ongoing action. 'Which is really rewarding job' lacks an article and should be 'which is a really rewarding job'. 'I like to helping' is incorrect; it should be 'I like helping' because 'like' is followed by the gerund form. 'I get some correct information for them' is awkward; 'I provide correct information to help them' is clearer and grammatically correct.

× I work in a hotel which is locate which is located in the Tokyo or Shaggy station. The place is really near from the Tokyo Sky Street.

✓ I work in a hotel which is located near Tokyo or Shinjuku station. The place is really near Tokyo Sky Street.

The phrase 'which is locate' is incorrect; it should be 'which is located'. 'Near from' is incorrect; 'near' does not require 'from'. Also, 'Shaggy' is likely a mispronunciation or typo for 'Shinjuku'.

× So there are many tourists from other countries, different countries and in my hotel there are many foreign customers who came. Different countries stay at my hotel so I can need.

✓ There are many tourists from different countries, and many foreign customers stay at my hotel, so I can meet them.

The sentence has plural and singular inconsistencies and unclear phrasing. 'Who came' should be 'who come' or 'stay' to match present tense. 'So I can need' is incorrect; likely intended 'so I can meet' or 'interact with' them.

× Many coworkers are really friendly to me and also it's really good place to learn about English because there are many foreign customers came to come to our hotels so I can practice my English usually daily life.

✓ Many coworkers are really friendly to me, and it's also a really good place to learn English because many foreign customers come to our hotel, so I can practice my English in daily life.

'Customers came to come' is incorrect; it should be 'customers come' to indicate habitual action. 'Learn about English' is better as 'learn English'. 'Practice my English usually daily life' is awkward; 'practice my English in daily life' is clearer.

× And also my hotel is really designing hotels so I can learn about.

✓ Also, my hotel is really well designed, so I can learn a lot about design.

'Really designing hotels' is incorrect; it should be 'really well designed' to describe the hotel. The sentence is incomplete and unclear; adding 'so I can learn a lot about design' completes the thought.

× I like the place where you I work because there are many umm, shops around in my workplace.

✓ I like the place where I work because there are many shops around my workplace.

The phrase 'where you I work' is incorrect; it should be 'where I work'. 'Around in my workplace' is redundant; 'around my workplace' is sufficient.

× So when I, I, when I go to the lunch, I can many opt. I have many options to eat la for lunch.

✓ So when I go to lunch, I have many options to eat for lunch.

'I can many opt' is incorrect and unclear; it should be 'I have many options'. 'Go to the lunch' should be 'go to lunch' without 'the'. 'Eat la' seems to be a filler or typo and is removed.

× For example, I can I went to the Gyudon restaurant, which is really famous in Japan, and then she it's really cheap for me.

✓ For example, I went to the Gyudon restaurant, which is really famous in Japan, and it was really cheap for me.

'I can I went' is incorrect; 'I went' is sufficient. 'She it's really cheap' is incorrect; 'it was really cheap' is correct to refer to the restaurant and past experience.

× My future plan for work is I I will want, I want to work in Canada as a architect architect.

✓ My future work plan is that I want to work in Canada as an architect.

'I will want' is incorrect; 'I want' is sufficient to express desire. 'A architect' is incorrect; 'an architect' is correct because 'architect' starts with a vowel sound.

× So I need to go to university 1st to learn about architecture which is which is really fun for me.

✓ So I need to go to university first to study architecture, which is really fun for me.

'Learn about architecture' is better expressed as 'study architecture' in this context. '1st' should be spelled out as 'first'. The repetition 'which is which is' is an error and corrected to a single 'which is'.

× And after work starting up after studying in Canada university and I want to work, I want to work as an internship.

✓ After studying at a Canadian university, I want to start working as an intern.

The original sentence is fragmented and unclear. 'After work starting up after studying' is confusing; rephrased to 'After studying at a Canadian university'. 'Work as an internship' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'work as an intern'.