Work— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Be more concise and clear. Start with a direct topic sentence (I am a student) then give 1–2 specific supporting details. Use correct tense and grammar, avoid repetition, and link ideas with simple connectors (because, so). Keep to 2–4 sentences and correct phrases like 'completed my degree', 'prepare for my IELTS', 'study for a master's abroad'.

Example: I am currently a student. I recently completed my degree in Social Sciences and now I am preparing for the IELTS because I want to pursue a master's degree abroad. Therefore, I spend most of my time studying and practicing exam skills.

Suggestion: Answer directly: say you don't work, then give one clear reason. Avoid repeating the same idea. Use correct grammar: 'I do not have a job at the moment' or 'I am not working because I am preparing for the IELTS'. Limit to 2–3 sentences and use linking word 'because' to connect reason.

Example: I am not working at the moment because I am focusing on exam preparation. Specifically, I am studying for the IELTS as I plan to apply for a master's program abroad.

Suggestion: Give a clear topic sentence about whether it is a good place, then support with 1–2 specific details and an example. Fix tense and vocabulary ('I started working last month', 'marketing development manager', 'colleagues are supportive'). Use a linking phrase such as 'for example' correctly and finish the example coherently.

Example: Yes, it is a good place to work. I started last month as a Marketing Development Manager at Actor Group Company Limited, and the office atmosphere is pleasant; my colleagues help me with campaigns and brainstorming. For example, when I had a problem with a promotion plan, Hoyna and others suggested useful ideas and supported me.

Suggestion: Answer directly (Yes or No), then give balanced supporting points: one positive and one challenge if relevant. Use correct grammar ('my colleagues and boss are friendly', 'I face some difficulties with current tasks'). Keep it coherent and finish the sentence. Use linking words like 'however' to show contrast.

Example: Yes, I like the place because my colleagues and my boss are friendly and the atmosphere is positive. However, I sometimes face difficulties with the workload and the information I need for tasks, so I am working on improving my time management.

Suggestion: Start with a clear topic sentence about your main plan. Provide specific details about the type of business and motivations. If you mention an NGO or social work, explain how it connects to your plan. Use clear vocabulary ('I come from a family of business owners', 'I want to start my own company and later support an NGO'). Keep within 2–4 sentences.

Example: In the future I plan to start my own business because I come from a family of entrepreneurs; my father and grandfather were both business owners. In addition, I would like to support or establish an NGO to help people in need, such as families who travel or people living on the roadside, by providing food and practical assistance.

× Well, I'm a student recently I completed my graduation at social science department.

✓ Well, I'm a student. Recently I completed my graduation from the Social Sciences department.

Run-on sentence and preposition/article errors. The original combines two independent clauses without proper punctuation (Sentence structure error) and uses incorrect preposition 'at' and missing definite article/capitalization for the department name. Suggest splitting into two sentences, use 'from' for graduating from a department, and capitalize 'Social Sciences'.

× But now I prepare for my IELTS exam because I want to pursue my career in abroad for my master degree.

✓ But now I am preparing for my IELTS exam because I want to pursue my career abroad for my master's degree.

Incorrect verb form and preposition usage. Use present continuous 'am preparing' for current activity and use 'abroad' without 'in'. Also use possessive 'master's degree'. This corrects Present tense and Preposition mistakes.

× So that's the reason nowadays I actually spend more the time in on study and practice my base and keep my base score in IELTS.

✓ So that's the reason I am currently spending more time studying and practising to maintain my base IELTS score.

Awkward word order, incorrect prepositions and verb forms. 'Spend time studying' is correct, not 'spend the time in on study'. Use 'practising' (verb + -ing) and 'maintain' for keeping a score. Improve clarity by reordering words and using continuous tense for ongoing action.

× So it is the quite.

✓ So it is quite important.

Incomplete and unclear sentence (Sentence structure error). 'So it is the quite' is grammatically incorrect and lacks a noun or adjective complement. Adding 'important' or another appropriate adjective completes the idea.

× Actually, I right now I do not work any official and other corporate office because I was actually focused on my study nowadays because I actually prepare.

✓ Actually, right now I do not work in any official or corporate office because I am focusing on my studies and preparing for the IELTS.

Redundant words, incorrect prepositions and tense inconsistency. Use 'right now' without repeating 'I', use 'in any official or corporate office' for preposition, and present continuous 'am focusing'/'preparing' for current actions. Remove repeated 'actually'.

× For example, I was prepared for my IELTS exam because I want to pursue my career in abroad.

✓ For example, I am preparing for my IELTS exam because I want to pursue my career abroad.

Tense and preposition errors. 'Was prepared' suggests past completion; use present continuous 'am preparing' for ongoing action. Use 'abroad' without 'in'.

× That's the reason I do not focus any work or any job purpose.

✓ That's the reason I do not focus on any work or job at the moment.

Missing preposition 'on' after 'focus' and awkward phrase 'job purpose'. Add 'at the moment' for clarity and temporal context.

× I always focus my study.

✓ I always focus on my studies.

Missing preposition 'on' after 'focus' and plural 'studies' is more natural. Use 'studies' rather than singular 'study' when referring to one's academic work.

× Work I will I started work last month at Actor Group Company Limited as a marketing development manager.

✓ I started work last month at Actor Group Company Limited as a marketing development manager.

Extra words and incorrect word order. Remove 'Work I will' which is nonsensical. Simple past 'started' correctly indicates a past action. Maintain clear subject-verb order.

× It was a good place to work because the office environment is pleasant and my colleagues are very supportive.

✓ It is a good place to work because the office environment is pleasant and my colleagues are very supportive.

Tense inconsistency: describing a current workplace should use present tense 'is' not 'was'. The article use is acceptable; change verb to present tense to match meaning.

× For example, Hoyna struggle any problem or any campaigning and for brainstorming situation they always try to appreciate for me and always do a.

✓ For example, when Hoyna faces problems with campaigns or during brainstorming sessions, they always support and appreciate me.

Incorrect verb forms, missing prepositions, and incomplete phrase. Use 'faces' for third person, correct noun forms 'campaigns' and 'sessions', and clear verbs 'support' and 'appreciate'. Remove dangling 'and always do a'.

× Yes, actually the place is very friendly and the environment was quite positive because every people in my colleagues and my boss, they are all always friendly with me.

✓ Yes, actually the place is very friendly and the environment is quite positive because all my colleagues and my boss are always friendly to me.

Tense inconsistency and incorrect phrase 'every people in my colleagues'. Use 'all my colleagues' and present tense 'is'/'are' for current situation. Use 'friendly to me' or 'friendly with me' consistently.

× And then another part for example, I facing the lot of difficulties for the present information and also tasks that keep from my boss, so that the reason that I'm.

✓ However, I face a lot of difficulties with the current information and also with the tasks my boss assigns, which is why I am struggling.

Incorrect verb forms, missing articles, and an incomplete sentence. Use present simple 'I face' or present continuous 'I am facing', correct quantifier 'a lot of', and clear relative clause 'which is why I am struggling' to finish the thought.

× Well, in future I want to open the business because I'm from background of family business.

✓ Well, in the future I want to start a business because I come from a family business background.

Article and word choice errors. Use 'in the future' and 'start a business' (more natural than 'open the business'). 'Come from a family business background' is a clearer phrase. Maintain future intention with 'want to'.

× My father and my grandfather, they were businessmen.

✓ My father and grandfather were businessmen.

Redundant pronoun 'they' is unnecessary. Past tense 'were' is fine if they are no longer living or no longer businessmen; if they still are, use 'are businessmen'. Remove repetitive possessive.

× So that's the reason in future I want to open my own business.

✓ So that's why, in the future, I want to start my own business.

Awkward phrasing. Use 'that's why' and 'start my own business' and add commas for clarity. Maintain future intention.

× Yeah, also is which is NGO.

✓ I am also interested in working with an NGO.

Fragment and unclear phrasing. Replace fragment with clear statement: 'I am also interested in working with an NGO.' This provides subject, verb and object.

× I want to fascinate about helping other people by through they who are travel for family and roadside people.

✓ I want to focus on helping other people, such as families who are travelling and people living on the roadside.

Incorrect word choice and grammar. 'Fascinate about' is wrong; use 'focus on' or 'be involved in'. Correct relative clause and noun phrases: 'families who are travelling' and 'people living on the roadside'. This fixes sentence structure and meaning.