Work— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Reduce hesitations and correct grammar: use one clear topic sentence, avoid repetition, and fix verb forms. For example, start with a concise statement about your job, then add one specific detail about responsibilities using a linking word. Keep to maximum 3–4 short sentences.

Example: I work as a junior doctor at a local hospital. I am responsible for duties in the emergency department, where I assess and stabilize patients. In this role I often coordinate with nurses and other doctors to ensure prompt care.

Suggestion: Be concise and avoid repetition (like repeating 'Hospital'). Combine related points with linking words and use more natural descriptors. Give one or two specific reasons rather than vague praise.

Example: I work at Balak Salamatan Bokor Hospital, which is about 20 kilometres from my home. I enjoy working there because the nursing staff are very approachable and skilled, so teamwork is smooth.

Suggestion: Answer directly then give a clear contrast using linking words like 'however' or 'but'. Correct phrasing (e.g. 'the CT scanner is not well developed' -> 'we don’t have a CT scanner'). Be specific about which facilities are lacking and how it affects work.

Example: Overall it is a good place to work because of the friendly atmosphere. However, the hospital lacks some facilities — for example, we do not have a reliable CT scanner or a proper meeting room, which sometimes makes diagnosis and staff communication difficult.

Suggestion: Avoid repetition and hesitations; state your opinion clearly then give one or two concise supporting reasons with linking words. Use correct plural/singular and natural phrasing ('staff' not 'Staffs').

Example: Yes, I like working there because the staff and nurses are very supportive. Also, the workplace atmosphere is positive, which helps me learn and handle stressful shifts more confidently.

Suggestion: Organise your answer: state the plan clearly, then explain motivation with specific objectives. Remove hesitations and use correct terms (Master of Public Health; 'health sector' singular). Mention a concrete outcome you hope to achieve.

Example: I plan to apply to universities abroad for a Master of Public Health. I want to specialise in health financing so I can develop better funding models and help solve budgeting problems in the health sector.

× I am currently working in a hospital as a doctor here I responsible, I am responsible for the emergency departments and umm yeah, I'm just a junior doctor here.

✓ I am currently working in a hospital as a doctor here; I am responsible for the emergency department, and I'm a junior doctor here.

The original sentence misused pronouns and omitted the verb 'am' before 'responsible'. Also 'departments' should be singular when referring to the emergency department as a unit. Combine clauses with appropriate punctuation and use 'I'm' for consistency. Suggestion: insert the verb 'am' and use singular 'department' if referring to the emergency unit.

× I work in a hospital called Balak Salamatan Bokor Hospital Hospital.

✓ I work in a hospital called Balak Salamatan Bokor Hospital.

The phrase repeated the word 'Hospital' twice causing redundancy. Use the noun only once. Suggestion: remove the duplicate word.

× It is uh 20 kilometers away from my home.

✓ It is about 20 kilometers from my home.

The phrase 'away from' is not wrong but '20 kilometers away from my home' is wordy; better is 'about 20 kilometers from my home.' Use 'about' to express approximation. Suggestion: replace 'uh' with 'about' and use 'from' for distance expressions.

× I enjoy working here because the nurses are so approachable. They are uh, good persons also.

✓ I enjoy working here because the nurses are very approachable. They are good people as well.

'So' is informal; 'very' is more appropriate. 'Persons' is unnatural in this context; use 'people.' 'Also' at sentence end should be 'as well' for natural flow. Suggestion: replace 'so' with 'very', 'persons' with 'people', and use 'as well'.

× Well, it depends. In terms of the atmosphere, here is a very good place but umm in terms of facilities, there are not many facilities that are good such as the meeting room or umm the medical facilities like CT scan is not well developed.

✓ Well, it depends. In terms of the atmosphere, this is a very good place, but in terms of facilities, there are not many good ones; for example, there is no adequate meeting room, and medical facilities like the CT scan are not well developed.

The original has awkward word order ('here is a very good place') and repetition of 'facilities'. Also subject-verb agreement issue: 'CT scan is' should be 'CT scans are' or 'the CT scan is'. Clarify and use 'there is' for singular items or 'there are' for plural. Suggestion: reorder to 'this is a very good place', avoid repeating 'facilities', and ensure verb agreement with singular/plural nouns.

× Of course. Actually I like it so much because they are so supportive. The people here are so supportive, including the Staffs and the nurses.

✓ Of course. Actually I like it very much because the people here are very supportive, including the staff and the nurses.

'They' is vague; better to say 'the people here'. 'So much' is conversational; 'very much' is more formal. 'Staffs' is incorrect — 'staff' is a collective noun and should not be pluralized. Suggestion: use 'staff' (uncountable) and 'the people here' for clarity.

× I plan to apply to universities abroad, specifically as a Master of Public health so that I could fix, umm, wait, uh, I want to rephrase that. I want to be a specialist in health financing because I want to fix the financing problem in health sectors.

✓ I plan to apply to universities abroad, specifically for a Master of Public Health, because I want to specialize in health financing and help fix the financing problems in the health sector.

Use 'for a Master of Public Health' (preposition and article). 'Master of Public health' needs capitalization for 'Public Health'. 'Specialize' is the correct verb form for becoming a specialist. 'Financing problem' should be plural 'problems' if general, and 'health sector' is usually singular. Suggestion: use 'for a Master of Public Health', 'specialize in', and 'health sector' for natural phrasing.