Snacks— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: 문법 오류와 어순, 불필요한 반복을 줄이세요. 주어-동사 일치(‘I usually eat snacks’), 횟수 표현 정리(‘once or twice a day’), 중복되는 단어 제거(반복되는 ‘I’와 ‘umm’)에 집중하세요. 또한 한두 문장으로 직접 답변한 뒤, 이유를 덧붙일 때는 연결어(for example, because)를 사용해 정확하고 자연스럽게 말하세요.

Example: I usually eat snacks after I study, about once or twice a day. I often choose sweet snacks because they help me relax and feel happier after studying.

Suggestion: 의미에 맞지 않는 단어(‘healthier’) 사용을 고치고, 문장을 명확하게 구성하세요. 부정의견을 말할 때는 간결한 주제문('Not really') 뒤에 이유를 서술하고 연결어(because, therefore)를 사용하세요. 불필요한 반복과 말더듬을 줄이세요.

Example: Not really. I think snacks are unhealthy because they contain a lot of sugar, which can lead to weight gain and tooth decay. Therefore I try to limit how often I eat them.

Suggestion: 과거 시제와 빈도 표현을 정확히 사용하세요('I used to eat snacks three or four times a day'). 부모의 조언을 말할 때는 결과를 자연스럽게 연결하세요. 불필요한 반복(‘I I’, ‘my parents, they’)을 피하고 한 문장에 핵심 내용만 담으세요.

Example: Yes, I used to eat snacks three or four times a day when I was a child. My parents often warned me about it, but sometimes they allowed it as a treat.

Suggestion: 선호를 말할 때는 직접적이고 완결된 문장을 사용하세요. 예시나 과거 경험을 덧붙일 때는 연결어(for example, for instance, last week)와 완전한 문장을 사용해 구체적으로 설명하세요. 중복되는 표현('when I go to, when I went to')을 정리하세요.

Example: I like cake, especially cheesecake, because it is very creamy and sweet. For example, I went to a café last week and enjoyed a slice of cheesecake with coffee.

× After I study I usually is snack and once or two times a day.

✓ After I study I usually have a snack once or twice a day.

The verb 'is' is incorrect because 'snack' is a noun. Use the verb 'have' to indicate eating. Also correct 'once or two times' to the standard phrase 'once or twice'. Use present simple for habitual actions: 'I usually have'. Suggestion: Use 'have a snack' for eating and 'once or twice a day' for frequency.

× Umm especially I I often enjoy eating snack that includes sugar.

✓ Especially, I often enjoy eating snacks that contain sugar.

'Snack' should be plural 'snacks' when speaking generally. 'Includes' is OK but 'contain' is more natural for plural noun. Use present simple 'enjoy' for habitual preference and remove repeated 'I'. Suggestion: Use plural nouns for general statements and match verb form to plurality: 'snacks that contain sugar'.

× It makes me more happier.

✓ It makes me happier.

'More happier' is redundant because 'happier' is already the comparative form. Use either 'more happy' or 'happier', but not both. Suggestion: Use correct comparative form: 'happier'.

× Umm, not really because, uh, snack, uh, snacks have a lot of sugar, so it makes me umm, healthier.

✓ Not really, because snacks have a lot of sugar, so they make me less healthy.

Sentence has logical and grammatical issues: 'it makes me healthier' contradicts the reason; plural 'snacks' requires plural pronoun 'they' and 'make'. Use 'less healthy' to express negative health impact. Suggestion: Match pronoun to noun number and ensure logical consistency: 'snacks... they make me less healthy'.

× Uh, we always recognize the danger of snack that include a lot of sugar.

✓ We are always aware of the danger of snacks that include a lot of sugar.

Use 'we are aware of' instead of 'recognize' for this context. 'Snack' should be plural 'snacks' and verb 'include' should be 'include' (plural noun) — keep agreement. Also use present continuous 'are always aware' or simple present 'are aware'. Suggestion: Use correct noun number and natural collocation: 'aware of the danger of snacks that include a lot of sugar'.

× Yes, of course I I try to add snack on three or four times a day, so my parents give me advice.

✓ Yes, of course I used to try to have snacks three or four times a day, so my parents gave me advice.

Talking about past habit requires 'used to' or past tense. 'Try to add snack' is unnatural; use 'used to try to have snacks'. Also change 'give me advice' to past 'gave me advice'. Suggestion: Use past tense for past habits and natural collocations: 'used to have snacks' and 'gave me advice'.

× But my parents, they ended up forgiving me.

✓ But my parents ended up forgiving me.

Avoid unnecessary pronoun repetition 'my parents, they'. Keep subject once: 'my parents ended up forgiving me'. Suggestion: Remove redundant pronoun for clearer sentence.

× I enjoy eating a piece of cake, especially cheesecake, uh, it is very creamy and sweet.

✓ I enjoy eating cake, especially cheesecake; it is very creamy and sweet.

'A piece of cake' is fine but when speaking generally about types prefer 'cake'. Comma splice fixed by semicolon. No article needed before 'cheesecake'. Suggestion: Use parallel structure for general preferences: 'I enjoy eating cake, especially cheesecake.'

× So when I go to, uh, for example, when I go to cafe, when I went to cafe last week, uh.

✓ For example, when I go to a cafe, or when I went to a cafe last week, I usually ordered cheesecake.

Original is fragmented and repetitive. Provide complete clause matching tense: 'when I go to a cafe' (general) and 'when I went to a cafe last week' (past) need main clause. Also add article 'a cafe'. Suggestion: Avoid fragments by finishing the thought and use the correct article: 'a cafe' and include the main verb.