Snacks— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Be more natural and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, correct grammar (e.g. "it brings me happiness"), and give one specific brief example. Avoid redundancy and keep to 2–3 sentences.

Example: I usually snack when I feel stressed because it helps me relax and lift my mood. For example, during final exam revision I often have a small chocolate bar to calm my nerves and boost my energy.

Suggestion: Improve grammar and clarity. Begin with a direct opinion, use linking words, and give a specific frequency and brief reason. Replace vague phrases like "beating too much" with "eating too many".

Example: Eating too many snacks is unhealthy, but I think my habit is fine because I only snack about twice a week. Also, I usually have snacks after a meal and pair them with fruit, which makes them less harmful.

Suggestion: Give a direct past-tense response and use correct sentence structure. Be specific about examples and mention parental rules with a clear reason. Keep it concise and natural.

Example: Yes, I often ate snacks when I was young because I loved sweets like chocolate and cakes. However, my parents limited how much I could have to protect my teeth and keep my diet balanced.

Suggestion: Answer directly and avoid hesitation. Use present simple for current preferences, be specific about which cake and why, and limit to two sentences. Avoid exaggerated phrasing and filler words.

Example: It depends, but recently I often choose a slice of chocolate cake. I enjoy it because the rich flavor cheers me up and helps me unwind after a long day.

× I usually eat snacks when I feel stressed because I think it's a good way to relax myself and you can bring me happiness.

✓ I usually eat snacks when I feel stressed because I think it's a good way to relax and it can bring me happiness.

The reflexive pronoun 'myself' is unnecessary after 'relax'; use the base verb 'relax'. 'You can bring me happiness' is inappropriate in context because the speaker meant snacks bring happiness; replace 'you' with 'it' to refer to 'snacks'. Use clear subject reference to avoid confusion.

× For example, when I have too much talks to finish in my final examination preparations, I would like to.

✓ For example, when I have too many talks to finish while preparing for my final examinations, I tend to eat snacks.

'Too much talks' mixes countable noun with 'much'; use 'too many talks'. The clause 'in my final examination preparations' is awkward; use 'while preparing for my final examinations'. 'I would like to' is incomplete; supply a clear verb phrase (e.g., 'tend to eat snacks').

× Beating too much snacks is unhealthy, but As for me, I just eat snacks maybe twice a week and so I think it doesn't matter and I usually eat after my meal with some fruits.

✓ Eating too many snacks is unhealthy, but as for me, I only eat snacks maybe twice a week so I think it doesn't matter, and I usually eat them after my meal with some fruit.

'Beating' is incorrect; the gerund form 'eating' is needed. 'Too much snacks' should be 'too many snacks' because 'snacks' is countable. 'As' should be lowercase 'as'. 'I just' is better as 'I only'. 'With some fruits' is awkward for accompaniment; use 'with some fruit' or 'with fruit'. Also add 'them' to refer back to 'snacks'.

× Did you often eat snacks when you were young?

✓ Did you often eat snacks when you were young?

This sentence is correct and matches past time reference; no correction needed.

× It is of course. I'm a girl who very like to eat some sweet foods such as chocolate, cakes and so on, but my parents would control me to avoid eating too much because it would be harmful to my teeth.

✓ Of course. I'm a girl who really likes to eat sweet foods such as chocolate and cakes, but my parents controlled me to avoid eating too much because it would be harmful to my teeth.

'It is of course' is awkward; 'Of course' is natural. 'Who very like' is incorrect; use 'who really likes' for third person singular agreement. 'Some sweet foods' can be simplified to 'sweet foods' and 'such as chocolate and cakes' is sufficient. 'Would control me' is unnatural for past habit; use 'controlled me'.

× Just depends. But recently I prefer to eat a piece of cake.

✓ It depends. But recently I prefer to eat a piece of cake.

'Just depends' is incomplete; 'It depends' supplies the subject. The rest is acceptable; no quantifier errors beyond missing subject.

× I think it was one of the most, uh, delicious things in the world I have ever eaten and it can bring me happiness and help me to, uh, relax myself.

✓ I think it is one of the most delicious things in the world I have ever eaten, and it brings me happiness and helps me relax.

Mixing past 'was' with present 'I have ever eaten' is inconsistent; use present 'is' to express a general opinion about the cake. 'Can bring' is acceptable but 'brings' is more natural. 'Help me to, uh, relax myself' should be 'helps me relax'—omit 'to' and 'myself' is unnecessary after 'relax'. Also remove filler 'uh' for clarity.