Birthday— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Your answer is relevant but contains many hesitations and filler words like 'umm' and 'uh', which affect fluency and naturalness. Try to reduce these fillers and use more precise vocabulary. Also, avoid repeating words unnecessarily, such as 'cutting, cutting'. Use linking words to connect ideas smoothly.

Example: Usually on my birthday, I invite my cousins, aunts, and uncles to my house. We prepare delicious food and celebrate by cutting the birthday cake together. This tradition helps strengthen my family bonds and creates joyful memories.

Suggestion: Your answer is somewhat unclear and contains many hesitations and repetitions. Try to organize your ideas more clearly with a topic sentence and supporting details. Use linking words like 'because' or 'so' to explain reasons. Also, avoid repeating words and filler sounds to improve fluency.

Example: When I was young, my birthday often coincided with the first day of school. Because of this, I felt very excited about the new semester. To celebrate, I used to distribute chocolates to my classmates, which made the day special.

Suggestion: Your answer has good content but is difficult to understand due to unclear phrasing and grammar mistakes. Try to express your ideas more clearly and avoid redundant words like 'once one one day'. Use simple and correct sentence structures to convey your opinion effectively.

Example: I think celebrating your birthday is important because it only happens once a year. This special day makes you feel unique and stands out compared to other days.

Suggestion: Your answer is honest but lacks direct response to the question. Try to answer the question directly first, then add your personal opinion or curiosity. Also, reduce filler words and improve sentence structure for clarity and fluency.

Example: I'm not very familiar with Chinese birthday traditions since I live in India. However, I believe that in China, celebrating the birthdays of elders is very important because it shows respect and appreciation for their wisdom.

× Usually on my birthday, umm, we call uh, my cousins and my aunts uncle to my house, umm, uh, make a delicious food and even celebrate my birthday by umm, uh, cutting, uh, cutting my birthday cake.

✓ Usually on my birthday, umm, we call, uh, my cousins and my aunts and uncles to my house, umm, uh, make delicious food and even celebrate my birthday by, umm, uh, cutting, uh, cutting my birthday cake.

The phrase 'my aunts uncle' is incorrect because it mixes singular and plural forms improperly. It should be 'my aunts and uncles' to correctly refer to multiple relatives. Also, 'make a delicious food' is incorrect because 'food' is an uncountable noun and does not take an article 'a'. The correct phrase is 'make delicious food'. These corrections address singular/plural and article usage issues.

× Uh, it uh, it helps me umm, uh, build my family bond with my cousins and my aunts and uncles.

✓ Uh, it uh, it helps me umm, uh, build my family bonds with my cousins and my aunts and uncles.

The phrase 'build my family bond' should be pluralized to 'build my family bonds' because the speaker is referring to multiple relationships with cousins, aunts, and uncles. This is a singular/plural issue rather than a present participle form issue, but the correction improves clarity and grammatical correctness.

× Usually on my birthdays every year, uh, back then when I was in my school, umm, it would, it would be the first day of the year that I'd be attending the school.

✓ Usually on my birthdays every year, uh, back then when I was in school, umm, it was the first day of the year that I attended school.

The phrase 'I'd be attending the school' is awkward and incorrect in this context. The past simple tense 'I attended school' is appropriate to describe a habitual past event. Also, 'in my school' is better expressed as 'in school' when referring to attending school generally. The modal 'would' is unnecessary here and removed for clarity.

× So it was a very, I was very exciting for the, uh, new semester.

✓ So it was a very exciting, I was very excited for the new semester.

The phrase 'I was very exciting' is incorrect because 'exciting' describes something that causes excitement, not the feeling itself. The correct adjective to describe a person's feeling is 'excited'. Also, 'a very' should be followed by an adjective describing a noun, so 'a very exciting' is correct when describing 'day' or 'time' implied here.

× So it made, umm, my birthday very special, uh, by celebrating, celebrating it, uh, by, uh, umm, distributing chocolate.

✓ So it made, umm, my birthday very special by celebrating it, uh, by, umm, distributing chocolate.

The repetition of 'celebrating' is unnecessary and awkward. Removing the repeated word improves fluency. The use of 'by celebrating' followed by 'by distributing' is correct as both are gerunds indicating means of making the birthday special.

× I feel like it is quite important to celebrate your birthday because as it comes only once in a year, maybe that once one one day could make you feel more special and highlight of the highlight you the compared to other days.

✓ I feel like it is quite important to celebrate your birthday because it comes only once a year; maybe that one day can make you feel more special and be the highlight compared to other days.

The phrase 'once one one day' is redundant and incorrect; it should be 'one day'. The modal verb 'could' is changed to 'can' to express a general truth or possibility. The phrase 'highlight of the highlight you the compared to other days' is ungrammatical and is corrected to 'be the highlight compared to other days' for clarity and correctness.

× When it comes to this, umm, I'm not uh, much, uh, familiar to this topic as I stay in India and I'm not umm uh, uh, much in uh, interested in knowing about the China, but uh, but I would definitely like to know how Chinese uh, people celebrate in their country and umm, their tradition.

✓ When it comes to this, umm, I'm not very familiar with this topic as I live in India and I'm not very interested in knowing about China, but I would definitely like to know how Chinese people celebrate in their country and their traditions.

The phrase 'familiar to this topic' is incorrect; the correct preposition is 'familiar with'. 'Stay in India' is better expressed as 'live in India' for permanent residence. 'Much in interested' is incorrect; it should be 'very interested'. 'Knowing about the China' is incorrect; 'the' is unnecessary before country names like China. 'Their tradition' should be plural 'their traditions' to refer to multiple customs.