Birthday— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Your answer is somewhat unclear and contains a mistake ('do a cat' likely meant 'have a party'). Try to use clear and correct expressions. Also, avoid filler words like 'uh' and be more concise. Use linking words to connect ideas smoothly.

Example: On my birthday, I usually have a party at my house with my friends and family. We bring plenty of food, play music, and dance together. It is always a joyful celebration.

Suggestion: Your answer is good but can be improved by avoiding repetition ('used to bring candies and distribute candies') and by using linking words to make the answer more coherent. Also, try to be more concise and avoid filler words like 'when I when I'.

Example: When I was young, I used to bring candies to share with my friends on my birthday. In the evening, my parents would bring a cake, which I shared with my cousins. Those moments were very memorable and I still cherish them.

Suggestion: Your answer is relevant and mostly clear, but avoid repeating phrases like 'once in a once in a year'. Also, try to use more formal linking words instead of 'cause'.

Example: I believe it is important to celebrate birthdays because they occur only once a year. Moreover, they provide an opportunity to gather with family and friends, creating memorable moments for everyone involved.

Suggestion: Your answer conveys the main idea but contains some grammatical errors and unclear phrases ('person should get their movement'). Try to use clearer expressions and correct grammar. Also, use linking words to improve coherence.

Example: I believe that every person's birthday is important to celebrate, regardless of where they live, including China. Celebrating birthdays shows respect and appreciation for each individual.

× On my birthday, we usually do a cat together with my friends and family members at my own house.

✓ On my birthday, we usually have a party together with my friends and family members at my own house.

The phrase 'do a cat' is incorrect; the correct expression is 'have a party'. Also, 'a cat' is a misuse of the definite article and noun combination here.

× I remembered when I was young, I used to bring candies and distribute candies to my friends on my birthday and in the evening when I when I was at home, my parents used to bring a cake.

✓ I remember when I was young, I used to bring candies and distribute them to my friends on my birthday, and in the evening when I was at home, my parents used to bring a cake.

The verb 'remembered' should be in present tense 'remember' to express a current memory. Also, 'distribute candies' is repetitive; 'distribute them' is clearer. The repeated phrase 'when I' is a redundancy and should be corrected.

× I used to get the cake and distribute with my cousins.

✓ I used to get the cake and distribute it with my cousins.

The verb 'distribute' requires an object; 'it' refers to the cake and should be included to complete the sentence.

× Well, it depends upon the person's choice.

✓ Well, it depends on the person's choice.

The preposition 'upon' is less common and 'depends on' is the standard usage. Also, 'the person's choice' is correct if referring to a specific person; if general, 'a person's choice' might be better.

× Personally, I think that it is really important to celebrate your birthday 'cause it only comes once in a once in a year and you get a chance to get together with your family and friends.

✓ Personally, I think that it is really important to celebrate your birthday because it only comes once a year and you get a chance to get together with your family and friends.

The phrase 'once in a once in a year' is redundant and incorrect; the correct phrase is 'once a year'. Also, 'cause' is informal; 'because' is more appropriate in formal speech.

× So it makes it a memorable moment for everyone who's included.

✓ So it makes a memorable moment for everyone who is included.

The phrase 'who's included' is a contraction of 'who is' or 'who has'; here, 'who is included' is correct. Also, 'makes it a memorable moment' is redundant; 'makes a memorable moment' is clearer.

× Well, I think that everyone's birthday is important to celebrate. No matter where you are, even in China, every person is important. So I believe that the birthday of every person should be celebrated and person should get their movement.

✓ Well, I think that everyone's birthday is important to celebrate. No matter where you are, even in China, every person is important. So I believe that the birthday of every person should be celebrated and each person should get their moment.

The phrase 'and person should get their movement' is incorrect. It should be 'each person should get their moment'. 'Movement' is a wrong word choice here; 'moment' fits the context.