Birthday— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Clarify meaning and correct grammar. Use a clear topic sentence, avoid hesitations and inappropriate words, and keep under five sentences. Include specific details (which restaurant, what food, who attends) and linking words to connect ideas.

Example: I usually celebrate my birthday with my family and close friends. We often go to a cozy Italian restaurant near my home where we share pasta and dessert. After dinner, we take many photos and post a few on my social media so I can remember the evening.

Suggestion: Fix past tense and word choice, provide a clear topic sentence and specific details about childhood traditions. Use linking words (for example, then, after that) and keep responses concise.

Example: When I was young, I celebrated my birthday at home with my family and classmates. After cutting the cake, we played games and my parents took many photos. Then I would thank my mother for preparing the party and helping me with my gifts.

Suggestion: Correct grammar and collocations (e.g., "make me feel loved and appreciated"), remove unclear phrases ("a shoulder something"). Start with a direct opinion and support it with two specific reasons using linking words (because, so).

Example: Yes, I think celebrating my birthday is important because it makes me feel loved and appreciated. For example, a small dinner with close friends allows us to share memories and relax together, which makes the day feel special.

Suggestion: Improve sentence structure and vocabulary: use 'elder family members' and explain reasons clearly. Provide one or two specific cultural reasons and use linking words (for example, because, therefore). Keep it natural and concise.

Example: In China, I believe the birthdays of elder family members, like parents and grandparents, are the most important. Celebrating them shows respect and gratitude, and it also follows the tradition of family reunion during special occasions.

× I usually stand burned my ***** with my family and close uh friends.

✓ I usually spend my birthday with my family and close friends.

The original sentence has incorrect verb choice and word order. 'stand burned' is not meaningful here. Use 'spend' + time expression ('spend my birthday') to describe how you pass the day. Also remove filler 'uh' and extraneous symbols. This fixes sentence structure and clarity.

× We also going to a lovely restaurant where we eat together and we take a lot of photos and post them on my social media.

✓ We also go to a lovely restaurant where we eat together, take a lot of photos, and post them on my social media.

The verb 'going' lacks the auxiliary 'are' or appropriate tense. To describe habitual actions use the simple present: 'we go,' 'we eat,' 'we take,' 'we post.' Also combine clauses with commas and parallel verbs for clarity.

× When was young, I celebrated my birthday with my families and friends and we took a lot of photos and posted them on my social media.

✓ When I was young, I celebrated my birthday with my family and friends; we took a lot of photos and posted them on my social media.

Missing subject 'I' before 'was young' causes ungrammatical structure. 'Families' should be singular 'family' when referring to one's own family. The tense 'celebrated' and 'took' are correct for past events; add punctuation and the subject to improve grammar and readability.

× And then I will say thanks to my mom for everything, for everything she does for me.

✓ And then I would say thanks to my mom for everything she did for me.

Context describes past childhood birthdays, so use past tense or conditional 'would' rather than future 'will.' Also avoid repeating 'for everything'; combine phrases: 'thanks to my mom for everything she did for me.'

× I think it's very crucial to celebrate my birthday with my families and my close friends.

✓ I think it's very important to celebrate my birthday with my family and my close friends.

'Families' should be singular 'family' when referring to one's own family. 'Crucial' is grammatical but 'important' is more natural in this context. Keep article 'my' before 'family' and 'friends.'

× It make me feel loved and appreciate.

✓ It makes me feel loved and appreciated.

Subject 'It' requires the verb 'makes' (third person singular). 'Appreciate' must be in past participle form 'appreciated' to function as an adjective in this passive-like construction.

× We'll also have a small dinner and a shoulder something.

✓ We'll also have a small dinner and a short celebration.

'Shoulder something' is incorrect and unclear. Likely intended meaning is 'a small celebration' or 'a little party.' Replace with clear noun phrases. 'We'll' is future; if describing general habit, use 'We also have.' Choose tense to match context.

× It makes a birthday too special and.

✓ It makes a birthday very special.

The original sentence ends abruptly with 'and' and has awkward 'too special.' Use 'very special' for positive emphasis and remove the trailing conjunction. Ensure sentence completes the thought.

× I think is the most important celebrity are those elder member families such as parents and grandparents because it can show our respect and celebrate and graduated to them.

✓ I think the most important birthdays to celebrate are those of elder family members, such as parents and grandparents, because it shows our respect and honors them.

Multiple issues: missing subject 'the,' incorrect word order, wrong plural/singular forms ('celebrity' is irrelevant), and unclear verbs 'celebrate and graduated to them.' Use 'birthdays to celebrate' and 'elder family members.' Match subject and verb: 'birthdays ... are.' Use 'shows our respect' (singular) and 'honors them' to express honoring. This corrects sentence structure, word choice, and agreement.