Walking— Part 1 Informe

Sugerencia: 문장은 주제 문장을 포함하고 있지만 반복과 말을 더듬는 표현(uh, umm)이 많아 자연스럽지 못합니다. 문장을 간결하게 정리하고 이유를 명확히 제시하세요. 또한 연결어(for example, so, because 등)를 적절히 사용해 논리 흐름을 매끄럽게 만드세요. 예: 이유(commute time, exercise), 빈도(usually/almost every day)를 분명히 하고 2~3문장 이내로 답하세요.

Ejemplo: Yes, I walk a lot. I usually walk to the library almost every day because it takes me about 40 minutes and I prefer walking to taking the bus for exercise and fresh air.

Sugerencia: 질문에 대한 직접적인 답변은 했지만 혼동되는 정보(걷지 않았음 vs 대중교통에 대한 불만)를 동시에 제시해 일관성이 떨어집니다. 어린 시절의 습관을 중심으로 구체적인 이유(예: 집 근처에 놀이터가 없었음, 바쁜 가족 일정 등)를 간단히 덧붙이세요. 말버릇과 반복( really, it really)도 줄이세요.

Ejemplo: No, I didn't often walk when I was a child. My family usually drove everywhere, so I rarely had chances to walk around the neighborhood.

Sugerencia: 답변은 이유를 제시했지만 문장이 길고 연결어 사용이 어색합니다. 'because', 'so', 'therefore' 같은 연결어로 이유와 결과를 명확히 연결하고 구체적인 효과(less stress, fresh air, exercise)를 추가하세요. 문장 수는 2문장 내로 유지하면 더 자연스럽습니다.

Ejemplo: People like walking in parks because they often work indoors and stare at screens, so a walk provides fresh air and helps reduce stress.

Sugerencia: 원하는 장소를 말했지만 표현이 중복되고 비문이 포함되어 있습니다. 장소 이름과 이유(beautiful scenery, famous trail, stamp-collecting activity)를 간결하게 설명하고 과거 경험 여부를 명확히 하세요. 불필요한 채우기 말(uh, umm)을 제거하세요.

Ejemplo: I'd like to walk along the Jeju Olle Trail, which is famous for its beautiful coastal scenery and the stamp-collecting stations along the route. I haven't had the chance to go yet.

Sugerencia: 최근 산책 장소를 답변했으나 시제 혼동('go' vs 'went')과 어색한 문장 구조가 있습니다. 과거 시제 또는 현재 습관을 명확히 구분하고 이유(시간 부족)와 대안으로서의 도서관 산책을 간결히 설명하세요. 연결어(so, therefore)를 올바르게 사용하세요.

Ejemplo: Lately I have been walking to the library because I don't have much free time, so short walks to and from work serve as my main exercise.

× Yes, I walk a lot because, uh, almost every day I go to a library which is uh, which I have to work for about 40 minutes, umm, and I can get a bus, but I don't because I love walking.

✓ Yes, I walk a lot because almost every day I go to a library where I have to work for about 40 minutes, and I could take a bus, but I don't because I love walking.

The sentence uses present simple but has relative clause and modal choice issues. Use 'where' instead of 'which' to refer to a place. 'Which I have to work for about 40 minutes' is ungrammatical; correct form is 'where I have to work for about 40 minutes.' Use 'could take a bus' as a natural modal alternative; 'can get a bus' is less natural here. Remove filler words and unnecessary commas for fluency. ID:6

× No, when I was a child. I'm not a walking person. I really also I really hate to take public transportation because it is really tight. It really makes me tired.

✓ No, when I was a child I wasn't a walking person. I really hated taking public transportation because it was very crowded and it made me tired.

Tense inconsistency: reference to childhood requires past tense. Change 'I'm not' to 'I wasn't.' 'I really also I really hate to take' is disfluent; use 'I really hated taking' with past continuous sense. 'Tight' is incorrect collocation; 'crowded' is appropriate. Maintain past tense throughout. ID:5

× I think these days most people work in indoor like they have to watch screens every time and but walking in park gives them a refreshing moment. I think this is the most attractive to.

✓ I think these days most people work indoors and have to look at screens all the time, but walking in a park gives them a refreshing break. I think that is very attractive.

Use adverb 'indoors' rather than adjective 'in indoor.' 'Watch screens' is better phrased as 'look at screens.' 'Every time' incorrect; use 'all the time.' Use article 'a' before 'park.' 'Refreshing moment' is awkward; 'refreshing break' is natural. 'This is the most attractive to' is ungrammatical — change to 'I think that is very attractive.' ID:11

× I like to walk the Jeju over Rd. It is very famous for the uh, TR trail because umm, they have the stamps and this is really famous and, but I didn't go there before.

✓ I would like to walk the Jeju Olle Road. It is very famous for the trail because they have stamp stations, and it is really popular, but I haven't been there before.

Use conditional 'would like' to express preference. Proper noun and name correction: 'Jeju Olle Road' is likely intended; use correct name and capitalization. 'TR trail' unclear; use 'trail.' 'They have the stamps' -> 'they have stamp stations.' Use present perfect 'I haven't been there before' to indicate experience up to now. Remove filler words and redundant conjunctions. ID:22

× As I said, umm, I go for a walk to library because, uh, recently I don't have much time to walk. So I this is the our alternative of my work, my walk.

✓ As I said, I walk to the library, but recently I haven't had much time to walk, so this is our alternative to my usual walk after work.

Tense and aspect: 'recently' requires present perfect 'haven't had' to show recent lack of time. Use 'walk to the library' or 'go for a walk to the library' for clarity. 'This is the our alternative of my work, my walk' is ungrammatical; rephrase to 'this is our alternative to my usual walk after work.' Remove redundant words and correct article use 'the library.' ID:6