Birthday— Part 1 Informe

Sugerencia: Your answer is somewhat unclear and contains grammatical errors. Try to start with a clear topic sentence directly answering the question, then add specific details using linking words. Avoid redundancy and improve sentence structure for natural flow.

Ejemplo: I usually celebrate my birthday on October 29th with my family and friends. For example, last year I organized a big sports event in Jordan, which made the day very enjoyable.

Sugerencia: Your answer has good content but lacks coherence and contains some unclear phrases. Use linking words to connect ideas and clarify your sentences. Also, avoid repeating similar ideas and improve vocabulary for clarity.

Ejemplo: When I was young, my mom often rented a football court for me and my friends. Additionally, sometimes we went to a bowling center where we played and had a lot of fun.

Sugerencia: Your answer is vague and does not directly address the question. Try to give a clear opinion with reasons and examples. Use linking words to organize your ideas logically.

Ejemplo: I think celebrating birthdays is important because it brings people together. However, some people may not celebrate due to financial reasons, which is understandable.

Sugerencia: Your answer is off-topic and lacks relevant content. Try to directly answer the question with a clear opinion and supporting details. Avoid unnecessary personal information that does not relate to the question.

Ejemplo: Although I don't know much about China, I believe the most important birthday to celebrate there is the emperor's birthday, as it is a significant cultural event.

× So first my birthday on October on the 29th.

✓ So first, my birthday is on October 29th.

The sentence lacks the verb 'is' to correctly express the existence of the birthday date. 'There be' issue refers to missing or incorrect use of 'there is/are' or similar constructions. Here, 'is' is needed to link the subject and the date.

× Most of the time I make a birthday with my friends, with my family.

✓ Most of the time I celebrate my birthday with my friends and my family.

The phrase 'make a birthday' is incorrect; the correct verb is 'celebrate' when referring to birthdays. Also, 'with' is correctly used here, but 'and' is better to connect 'friends' and 'family'.

× Like last year I made the big sporty in Jordan.

✓ Like last year, I had a big party in Jordan.

The phrase 'made the big sporty' is incorrect and unclear. The correct expression is 'had a big party'. Also, a comma is needed after 'Like last year' for clarity.

× This is why I love enjoying my birthday.

✓ This is why I love celebrating my birthday.

The verb 'enjoying' is not correctly used here. The phrase 'love enjoying' is awkward; 'love celebrating' is more appropriate for birthdays.

× When I was young, my mom tried or tried.

✓ When I was young, my mom tried.

The repetition 'tried or tried' is incorrect and redundant. The past tense 'tried' is correct here.

× She already rented for me a whole court, football court for me and my friends.

✓ She already rented a whole football court for me and my friends.

The preposition 'for' is incorrectly placed before 'me'. The correct structure is 'rented a court for me'.

× Some birthdays we went to the bowling center.

✓ On some birthdays, we went to the bowling center.

The sentence needs the preposition 'on' before 'some birthdays' to indicate time. The plural 'birthdays' is correct here.

× We played, we enjoyed, we did a lot of things.

✓ We played, we enjoyed, and we did a lot of things.

Adding 'and' before the last item in a list improves sentence structure and clarity.

× So depends on whose birthday, like there's some people who can't afford the money and to make a birthday and some people, yes.

✓ So it depends on whose birthday it is. Some people can't afford the money to celebrate a birthday, and some people can.

The sentence lacks a subject and verb in the first clause. 'There's some people' should be 'there are some people'. Also, 'to make a birthday' is incorrect; 'to celebrate a birthday' is correct.

× So I can't say anything for this.

✓ So I can't say anything about this.

The preposition 'for' is incorrect here; 'about' is the correct preposition to use with 'say anything'.

× To be honest, I don't know China.

✓ To be honest, I don't know much about China.

The phrase 'I don't know China' is awkward; adding 'much about' clarifies the meaning.

× I live in Jordan 'cause I have been three years in Jordan, 'cause I live there.

✓ I live in Jordan because I have been here for three years because I live there.

The sentence is repetitive and uses informal 'cause'. Also, 'have been three years in Jordan' needs 'for' to indicate duration.

× I have a school there.

✓ I attend school there.

'I have a school' is ambiguous; 'I attend school there' is clearer and fits the context.

× But I was born in Israel, so I've done anything.

✓ But I was born in Israel, so I haven't done anything.

The phrase 'I've done anything' is incorrect; the negative form 'I haven't done anything' is appropriate here.

× But if you think that, I think should be the emperor.

✓ But if you ask me, I think it should be the emperor.

The sentence lacks the subject 'it' before 'should be the emperor' and the phrase 'if you think that' is awkward; 'if you ask me' is more natural.