Work— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Try to use correct grammar and avoid redundancy. For example, say "I am currently a student studying computer science because I am really interested in it." Also, use linking words like "because" and "so" to make your answer more coherent and natural.

例: I am currently a student studying computer science because I am really interested in technology. Moreover, I believe this field offers many career opportunities due to rapid advancements.

提案: Focus on correct verb forms and sentence structure. Instead of "I attending," say "I am attending." Also, be more concise and clear, for example, "I am attending computer classes at an institute near my home called Protect Education."

例: I am attending computer classes at an institute near my home called Protect Education.

提案: Improve grammar and word choice. Use "collaborative" instead of "collaborated." Also, use linking words like "because" and "for example" properly. For instance, "It is a great place to learn because the environment is very supportive and collaborative. For example, tutors are always willing to help students, which makes completing tasks easier."

例: It is a great place to learn because the environment is very supportive and collaborative. For example, tutors are always willing to help students, which makes completing tasks much easier.

提案: Use correct expressions and grammar. Instead of "MO," clarify what you mean, perhaps "morale." Also, say "a comfortable and well-equipped institute can significantly boost my morale, confidence, and motivation." Keep sentences clear and avoid abbreviations that are unclear.

例: Of course, I love the place where I study. A comfortable and well-equipped institute can significantly boost my morale, confidence, and motivation.

提案: Use correct verb forms and sentence structure. For example, "These days, I am improving my computer skills, so I want to go abroad for further education. I also plan to do a part-time job sometime." Use linking words like "so" to connect ideas logically.

例: These days, I am improving my computer skills, so I want to go abroad for further education. I also plan to do a part-time job while studying.

× I'm pursuing my computer science subject because I really interested in it.

✓ I'm pursuing my computer science subject because I am really interested in it.

The verb 'interested' needs an auxiliary verb 'am' to form the present continuous tense correctly. Without 'am', the sentence is grammatically incorrect. The correct form is 'I am really interested in it.'

× there are variety of opportunities in that field to add a career.

✓ there are a variety of opportunities in that field to build a career.

The phrase 'variety of' requires an article 'a' before it. Also, 'add a career' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'build a career' which means to develop a professional path.

× I attending my computer classes by joining an institute which is nearby my home called Protect Education.

✓ I am attending my computer classes by joining an institute which is near my home called Protect Education.

The verb 'attending' requires an auxiliary verb 'am' to form the present continuous tense. Also, 'nearby' is an adverb and should be replaced with the adjective 'near' to correctly modify 'my home.'

× the environment is very supportive and collaborated.

✓ the environment is very supportive and collaborative.

The word 'collaborated' is the past participle form and incorrect here. The correct adjective is 'collaborative' to describe the environment as cooperative.

× tutors are always willing to help students which make completing task much easier.

✓ tutors are always willing to help students, which makes completing tasks much easier.

The relative clause 'which make' should be 'which makes' to agree with the singular noun 'which' referring to the whole preceding clause. Also, 'task' should be plural 'tasks' to generalize the meaning.

× Of course I love the place where I studied, a comfortable and well equipped to institute can significantly boost my MO, boost my confidence as well motivation.

✓ Of course I love the place where I study; a comfortable and well-equipped institute can significantly boost my morale, boost my confidence as well as motivation.

The sentence has multiple errors: 'studied' should be 'study' to match present context; 'to institute' is incorrect, should be 'institute'; 'MO' is unclear and likely meant 'morale'; 'well equipped' needs a hyphen as a compound adjective; 'as well motivation' should be 'as well as motivation' for correct conjunction.

× To be honest these days I am improve my computer skills so I want to go abroad for my further education and also sometime I do part time job.

✓ To be honest, these days I am improving my computer skills, so I want to go abroad for my further education and also sometimes do a part-time job.

The verb 'improve' needs to be in present continuous form 'am improving' to indicate ongoing action. 'Sometime' should be 'sometimes' to mean occasionally. 'Part time job' should be hyphenated as 'part-time job' and preceded by an article 'a'.