Work— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and avoid repetition and hesitation. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details. Correct small grammar errors (e.g., "an MBA degree", "I chose") and remove filler words like "uh."

例: I am currently a postgraduate student at Kerala University, studying for a second MBA. I completed a previous MBA in Psychology, and I chose another MBA to strengthen my background in both psychology and business.

提案: Good clear answer and relevant detail. Improve accuracy and fluency by making small grammar adjustments ("different age groups") and linking ideas smoothly. Keep it to two to three sentences maximum.

例: At the moment I'm not working, but I used to work as a child psychologist at a counseling center for different age groups. It was very rewarding because I could see clear improvements in the children’s behavior and confidence.

提案: Answer with one clear topic sentence and fewer short clauses. Correct collocations ("gain much knowledge" or "gain a lot of knowledge") and remove redundancy ("skills and abilities"). Use linking words like "because" appropriately.

例: Yes, definitely — it was one of my most enriching experiences because the supportive staff and positive environment encouraged me to learn new skills. Handling many projects also helped me gain a lot of knowledge beyond my core profession.

提案: Avoid mixed tenses and informal phrasing. Use a clear present or past tense consistent with situation (you are describing a past job). Fix grammar: "friendly, supportive vibes" → "a friendly, supportive atmosphere"; "me and my colleagues" → "my colleagues and I"; "exchange feedback" (uncountable). Be specific about what you practised to show depth.

例: I really enjoyed working there because it had a friendly, supportive atmosphere that was good for learning. For example, my colleagues and I would sit together after shifts to give each other feedback and practice new counseling techniques.

提案: Good content and clear intentions. Improve grammar and conciseness: use gerunds correctly ("helping people reach"), correct prepositions ("training for employees" → "employee training"), and avoid redundancy. Use one linking phrase to explain why it's a good fit.

例: I'm planning to work in Human Resources because I enjoy helping people reach their full potential and supporting career development. I hope to specialize in employee development and training, since my background in psychology and counseling makes this a good fit.

× Currently I am a postgraduate student at Kerala University.

✓ Currently I am a postgraduate student at Kerala University.

No grammatical change needed; sentence correctly uses present continuous to describe current status. Keep as is.

× I am pursuing MBA degree which is my second degree.

✓ I am pursuing an MBA degree, which is my second degree.

Use the article 'an' before the vowel sound 'M' for 'MBA' and add a comma before the non-restrictive clause 'which is my second degree.' Suggestion: say 'an MBA degree' and include punctuation for clarity.

× I have done my MBA in Psychology and I have chose the second degree just to complete uh to complete and to enrich my background in psychology and business.

✓ I did my MBA in Psychology, and I chose the second degree to complete and enrich my background in psychology and business.

Use simple past 'did' and 'chose' for completed past actions rather than present perfect or incorrect past form 'chose' vs 'have chose.' Remove filler repetitions and 'have chose' is ungrammatical (should be 'have chosen' if using present perfect). Here simple past is clearer. Suggestion: use 'did' and 'chose' for past completed studies.

× At the moment I'm not working, but I used to work as a child psychologist at a counseling center that supports students at different age group.

✓ At the moment I'm not working, but I used to work as a child psychologist at a counseling center that supports students in different age groups.

Use 'in' with 'age groups' and pluralize 'group' to 'groups.' 'Different age group' is incorrect; correct collocation is 'different age groups.' Suggestion: use plural and 'in' for supported populations.

× It was a very rewarding experience because I could see clear improvements in their behavior and confidence.

✓ It was a very rewarding experience because I could see clear improvements in their behaviour and confidence.

Sentence is grammatically acceptable; only note regional spelling variation 'behaviour' vs 'behavior.' No tense change required. Keep past simple 'was' for a past experience.

× Yes, definitely. It was one of my most enriching experiences because the staff was very supportive, the work environment was very encouraging to learn new skills and abilities.

✓ Yes, definitely. It was one of my most enriching experiences because the staff were very supportive, and the work environment was very encouraging for learning new skills and abilities.

Collective noun 'staff' can be plural ('were') in British English; use 'were' for agreement with plural sense. Also change 'encouraging to learn' to 'encouraging for learning' or 'encouraging me to learn.' Add 'and' to join clauses. Suggestion: use 'were' and 'encouraging for learning' or 'encouraging me to learn.'

× I was handling a lot of projects which helped me to gain many knowledge beyond my core professional.

✓ I handled a lot of projects, which helped me gain a lot of knowledge beyond my core professional area.

'Many' is used with count nouns; 'knowledge' is uncountable so use 'a lot of' or 'much' knowledge. Also 'core professional' is incomplete; add 'area.' Use simple past 'handled' to match past context. Suggestion: 'a lot of knowledge' and specify 'area.'

× I really enjoyed the workplace there because it has a friendly, supportive vibes.

✓ I really enjoyed the workplace there because it had a friendly, supportive vibe.

Maintain past tense 'had' to match 'enjoyed.' 'Vibe' is singular here; 'vibes' is informal plural but mismatches 'a.' Use 'a friendly, supportive vibe' or 'friendly, supportive vibes' with no 'a.' Suggestion: keep tense consistent and match article with noun number.

× The environment was very healthy to learn.

✓ The environment was very conducive to learning.

'Healthy to learn' is unnatural. Use 'conducive to learning' to express that the environment supported learning. Keep past tense 'was.' Suggestion: use established collocations like 'conducive to learning.'

× For example, me and my colleagues, we used to sit after the shifts and exchange feedbacks and practice new stuff.

✓ For example, my colleagues and I used to sit after shifts and exchange feedback and practice new things.

Subject pronoun order should be 'my colleagues and I' not 'me and my colleagues.' 'Shifts' needs no 'the' unless referring to specific shifts. 'Feedback' is uncountable (not 'feedbacks'), and 'new stuff' is informal—use 'new things.' Suggestion: use correct pronoun order, uncountable nouns, and more formal vocabulary.

× I'm planning to work in Human Resources because I enjoy helping people reaching their full potential, develop their careers, and deal with teams.

✓ I'm planning to work in Human Resources because I enjoy helping people reach their full potential, developing their careers, and working with teams.

After 'helping people' use the base form 'reach' (help someone do something) or use 'helping people to reach.' Use parallel gerund forms: 'developing' and 'working.' Suggestion: maintain parallel structure and correct verb form after 'helping.'

× I'm thinking to specialize in development and trainings in for employees because with my past experiences I think this is a good fit for me.

✓ I'm thinking of specializing in development and training for employees because, with my past experience, I think this is a good fit for me.

Use 'thinking of' + gerund 'specializing.' 'Training' is uncountable here (not 'trainings'). Remove the extra preposition 'in' and use 'for employees.' 'Experience' is usually uncountable in this context. Suggestion: 'thinking of specializing in development and training for employees' and use singular 'experience.'