Work— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and clearer. Start with a direct topic sentence (job title), then add one or two specific details using linking words. Avoid repeating phrases. Also check grammar: use articles and parallel structure (e.g., “I can travel and work from home”).

例: I work as a media editor. I freelance, so I can travel and also work from home, which gives me a lot of flexibility and makes me very happy with my job.

提案: Provide a clear topic sentence then support with concise, specific details. Use correct phrases (e.g., “travel to the office”) and a linking word to connect ideas. Avoid unnecessary hesitation words like “well” or repeating earlier points.

例: I work from home as a freelance media writer and editor. Because I don’t need to travel to the office every day, I can start work later and manage my time more flexibly.

提案: Be careful with tone and grammar. Start with a direct opinion, then give specific reasons with linking words. Avoid implying negative generalizations. Correct verb forms and pronouns (e.g., “we just sit”).

例: Yes, I think it’s a good place for me because I prefer quiet work. For example, I can focus on writing and editing without frequent meetings, which helps me be more productive.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence and avoid repetition. Use formal linking words (“because”, “so”) rather than informal contractions like “'cause”. Be precise: mention one or two hobbies or activities to make the detail more specific.

例: Yes, I’m quite satisfied with my job because it offers good flexibility and a healthy work–life balance. As a result, I have more spare time to pursue hobbies such as reading and photography.

提案: Answer directly and correct grammar: use simple future statements and avoid question form. Provide specific steps and timeline, and reduce repetition. Use linking words to show sequence (e.g., “first… then…”).

例: I plan to find a job in Canada. First I’m taking the IELTS for immigration, and after I get the required score I will start applying for openings on Canadian job websites.

× Well, I think it is especially for people like me who don't want to communicate with other people very frequently and we just sitting in front of the computer and repeating the work every day.

✓ Well, I think it is especially for people like me who don't want to communicate with other people very frequently and who just sit in front of the computer and repeat the work every day.

The original used 'we just sitting' which incorrectly mixes subject 'we' with a bare -ing form 'sitting' without an auxiliary. According to the listed problem types, this is an incorrect use of the verb + -ing form. Change to 'who just sit' to use the simple present, which matches the habitual context and keeps parallel structure with 'repeat'. Suggestion: use 'sit' (simple present) after 'who' when describing habitual actions.'

× Well, I think it is especially for people like me who don't want to communicate with other people very frequently and we just sitting in front of the computer and repeating the work every day.

✓ Well, I think it is especially for people like me who don't want to communicate with other people very frequently and who just sit in front of the computer and repeat the work every day.

The sentence mixed pronoun reference and relative clause structure: starting with 'people like me who...' requires the clause to continue describing 'people' (use 'who'), not switch to 'we'. This is an incorrect use of pronouns/clauses. Use 'who' + verb to keep the relative clause consistent. Suggestion: maintain 'who' to refer back to 'people' rather than inserting 'we'.

× I'm currently working as the media editor and I can travel, I can work from home, so I am very happy for my job, for getting the job.

✓ I'm currently working as a media editor and I can travel, I can work from home, so I am very happy about my job and about getting it.

Using 'the media editor' implies a specific known role; general occupations take the indefinite article 'a'. Also 'happy for my job' and 'for getting the job' are non-idiomatic; use 'happy about my job' and 'about getting it'. This falls under article errors and word choice related to prepositions. Suggestion: use 'a media editor' for a general job title and 'happy about' to express satisfaction.

× I don't need to travel to office every day, so I don't need to get up very early.

✓ I don't need to travel to the office every day, so I don't need to get up very early.

'Travel to office' misses the article 'the' before 'office' when referring to the workplace in general. This is an incorrect use of prepositions/articles. Use 'to the office'. Suggestion: include 'the' in 'travel to the office'.

× Yes, I'm quite satisfied with my with my job here 'cause like I said, it gives me flexibility and work balance between life and work and I have more spare time to do my hobbies.

✓ Yes, I'm quite satisfied with my job here because, like I said, it gives me flexibility and a balance between life and work, and I have more spare time for my hobbies.

The original repeats 'with my' and uses colloquial ''cause'. Also 'work balance between life and work' is awkward; use 'a balance between life and work' and 'spare time for my hobbies'. This involves pronoun repetition and article errors. Suggestion: remove duplicate words, use 'because' in formal speech, include 'a' before 'balance', and 'for' hobbies.

× Will I plan to find a job in Canada? So that's the reason why I take the IELTS exam for for immigration and after that I will start applying for the job on the website.

✓ Do I plan to find a job in Canada? That's why I'm taking the IELTS exam for immigration, and after that I will start applying for jobs on websites.

'Will I plan...' is incorrect for asking about current intentions; use 'Do I plan...' or better rephrase as 'I plan to...' Also 'I take the IELTS exam' should be present continuous 'I'm taking' for a current action, and 'the job on the website' should be plural/general 'jobs on websites' or 'jobs on a website'. These are future and tense usage errors. Suggestion: use present simple for plans or present continuous for ongoing preparations, and pluralize 'jobs' for general job search.