Hometown— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is somewhat repetitive and incomplete. Try to avoid repeating phrases like "very beautiful" multiple times and complete your sentences. Use linking words to connect ideas smoothly and provide specific details about your hometown, such as its name, historical sites, or unique features.

例: My hometown is a charming village in the south of China, specifically in Guangdong province. It is famous for its rich history and beautiful scenery, including ancient temples and lush parks. Because of these attractions, many tourists visit every year.

提案: Your answer is heartfelt but could be more concise and structured. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add specific supporting details. Use linking words like "because" or "especially" to connect ideas and avoid redundancy, such as repeating "my grandparents" multiple times.

例: I like my hometown because it holds many precious memories for me. I was born and raised there, spending my childhood with my family, especially my grandparents who still live there. Whenever I think of the village, I remember the happy times we shared together.

提案: Your answer contains some grammatical errors and redundancy. Use the correct tense "I lived" instead of "I had lived" for past events. Avoid repeating similar ideas and use linking words like "because" or "so" to make your answer coherent. Be concise and clear.

例: I lived in my hometown for over 16 years before moving to Hong Kong. Because I spent my entire childhood there with my grandparents, I feel a strong connection to the place.

提案: Your answer is clear and relevant but could be improved by using more precise vocabulary and better sentence structure. Use linking words like "however" or "on the other hand" to contrast ideas. Also, correct phrases like "no much opportunities" to "not many opportunities."

例: Whether my hometown is suitable for young people depends on their goals. If they are looking for job opportunities, I would not recommend it because there are not many jobs available, especially since the population is mostly elderly. However, if they prefer a quiet and peaceful environment, it could be an ideal place to live.

× it's also one of the most beautiful village in Guangdong province

✓ it's also one of the most beautiful villages in Guangdong province

The noun 'village' should be plural 'villages' because it is preceded by 'one of the most', which requires a plural noun to indicate one among many.

× it has a lot of historical scenes and also a lots of beautiful sightseeing

✓ it has a lot of historical scenes and also a lot of beautiful sightseeing

The phrase 'a lots of' is incorrect; the correct form is 'a lot of' when referring to a large quantity.

× I spent my whole childhood there with my families

✓ I spent my whole childhood there with my family

The word 'families' is plural, but here it should be singular 'family' because it refers to the immediate family unit.

× I had lived there for over 50 years

✓ I lived there for over 50 years

The past perfect tense 'had lived' is unnecessary here; simple past 'lived' is appropriate to describe a completed action in the past.

× there's no much opportunities to work there

✓ there aren't many opportunities to work there

'Opportunities' is plural, so the verb should be 'aren't' instead of 'there's'. Also, 'no much' is incorrect; 'many' is used with countable plural nouns.