Hometown— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is generally clear and informative, but it could be more concise and natural by avoiding redundancy such as "beautiful nature scenery" and "stunning harbor views" which overlap. Also, try to use linking words to connect ideas smoothly.

例: My hometown is Guangzhou, located on China's South Coast. It's a vibrant city famous for its stunning harbor views and the unique blend of modern skyscrapers with traditional culture. Additionally, Guangzhou is well-known as a major shopping centre.

提案: Your answer has good content but contains some errors and awkward phrasing, such as "a Guangzhou is known as the bathroom city" which seems incorrect. Also, avoid repetition of "beautiful scenery" and improve sentence structure for clarity. Use linking words to connect ideas logically.

例: I really enjoy the natural beauty of my hometown. Although Guangzhou is known for its fast-paced city life, it also offers peaceful green spaces where people can relax and escape the busy urban environment. This blend of vibrant city life and tranquil nature makes it a unique place.

提案: Your answer is clear and well-structured with relevant supporting details. To improve, you could use linking words like "and" or "which" more effectively to enhance coherence and avoid slight repetition.

例: I have lived in Guangzhou for almost 20 years since I was born here. Studying at a local university has allowed me to experience the culture and meet many interesting people, which has helped me feel deeply connected to the community.

提案: Your answer addresses the question but contains grammatical errors and incomplete sentences, such as "job opportunity" (should be plural) and the last sentence is unfinished. Also, use linking words to connect ideas and provide more specific examples.

例: Yes, Guangzhou is an excellent place for young people due to its rapidly growing industries and numerous job opportunities. Moreover, the city offers diverse environments where everyone can find their niche regardless of background. Additionally, there are many cultural and social activities that make life here exciting and vibrant.

× Although a Guangzhou is known as the bathroom city with fast-paced city life, it also boasts its beautiful scenery where people can relax and escape from busy urban environment.

✓ Although Guangzhou is known as the 'bathroom city' with fast-paced city life, it also boasts its beautiful scenery where people can relax and escape from the busy urban environment.

The article 'a' before 'Guangzhou' is incorrect because 'Guangzhou' is a proper noun and does not require an article. Also, 'bathroom city' should be in quotes as it is a nickname. Additionally, 'busy urban environment' needs the definite article 'the' because it refers to a specific environment.

× Yes, Guangzhou is an excellent place for young people because of its rapidly growing industry and numerous job opportunity.

✓ Yes, Guangzhou is an excellent place for young people because of its rapidly growing industry and numerous job opportunities.

The word 'opportunity' should be plural 'opportunities' because it refers to many jobs available, not just one. This is a singular and plural agreement issue.

× Additionally, there are many cultural and social activities make it exciting and.

✓ Additionally, there are many cultural and social activities that make it exciting.

The original sentence is incomplete and lacks a relative pronoun 'that' to connect the clause. Also, the sentence ends abruptly with 'and.' The corrected sentence completes the thought properly.