Hometown— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer contains factual errors and some awkward phrasing. Kaohsiung is actually in the south of Taiwan, not the north. Also, avoid combining multiple ideas in one sentence without clear structure. Try to give a clear topic sentence and then add supporting details with proper linking words.

例: My hometown is Kaohsiung, which is located in the south of Taiwan. It is known for its friendly people and affordable living costs.

提案: Your answer is unclear and contains grammatical errors and redundancy. Try to express your ideas clearly and avoid repetition. Use linking words to connect your ideas logically. For example, state what you like and then explain why.

例: I like the weather in my hometown because winters are mild and not too cold. This makes it comfortable to live there all year round.

提案: Your answer is confusing and grammatically incorrect. Make sure to use the correct tense and sentence structure. Also, provide a clear time frame and reason for moving. Avoid repetition and incomplete sentences.

例: I lived in Kaohsiung for about 15 years before I moved to Hualien. I moved because I got a job opportunity at Huawei.

提案: Your answer is unclear and contains many hesitations and repetitions. Try to organize your thoughts before speaking. Use linking words to explain your opinion clearly and provide specific reasons.

例: I don't think my hometown is very suitable for young people because there are not many job opportunities available.

× My hometown is Kaohsiung, which is the north of Taiwan, where people are very friendly and prices are amazing.

✓ My hometown is Kaohsiung, which is in the north of Taiwan, where people are very friendly and prices are amazing.

The preposition 'in' is required to indicate location within a region. Saying 'the north of Taiwan' without 'in' is incorrect because it does not specify that Kaohsiung is located within that area.

× In my hometown, I really like the weather. It's not cold in the winter. And it I I dislike frozen temperature however room warm.

✓ In my hometown, I really like the weather. It's not cold in the winter. However, I dislike freezing temperatures; I prefer it to be warm indoors.

The original sentence is fragmented and unclear. 'It I I dislike frozen temperature however room warm' is grammatically incorrect and confusing. The correction clarifies the meaning and uses proper sentence structure and vocabulary.

× I leave Kaohsiung probably 15 years when I before I came to Hualien. The reason is I the reason is I when I went to Huawei.

✓ I left Kaohsiung about 15 years ago before I came to Hualien. The reason is that when I went to Hualien...

The verb 'leave' should be in the past tense 'left' to match the past time reference. Also, the sentence is incomplete and repetitive; the correction improves clarity and tense consistency.

× I don't think it's Mary Popp is very, uh, friendly in, in my come in my hometown. The reason is they don't have a lot of a lot of opportunity job opportunities.

✓ I don't think my hometown is very friendly for young people. The reason is that there aren't many job opportunities.

The original sentence is confusing and contains irrelevant words ('Mary Popp'). The correction removes unnecessary words and restructures the sentence for clarity and grammatical correctness.