Names— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is somewhat unclear and contains many hesitations and filler words like 'uh'. Try to make your sentences more fluent and clear. Also, avoid redundancy and correct factual errors (e.g., 'capped' should be 'named'). Use linking words to connect ideas smoothly.

例: I don't know the exact meaning of my name, but it holds great significance in Islamic culture because the Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, named his daughter Fatima.

提案: Your answer is confusing and does not directly address the question. Make sure to give a clear and direct response with supporting details. Avoid contradictory statements and clarify your opinion.

例: If I have children in the future, I would choose names that have meaningful cultural or religious significance to me, as I believe names can influence a person's identity.

提案: Your answer is incomplete and lacks a direct response to the question. Try to answer directly first, then add supporting details with linking words. Also, avoid vague expressions like 'every second person'.

例: Yes, some of my relatives also have the name Fatima because it is a very common and respected name in Islamic culture.

提案: Your answer does not address the question properly and contains grammatical errors. Even if you don't know, try to give a brief opinion or say what you think. Use linking words to make your answer coherent.

例: I am not very familiar with Chinese naming traditions, but I think that like many cultures, they might have changed over time due to modernization and globalization.

提案: Your answer is unclear and contains incorrect words like 'narcissist'. Even if you don't know, try to respond politely and add a general comment. Avoid filler words and improve sentence structure.

例: I am not sure about the popular names in China, but I believe that like in other countries, some names become popular because of famous people or cultural trends.

× but it has very significant, uh, value in Islamic culture

✓ but it has very significant value in Islamic culture

The definite article 'the' is not needed before 'very significant value' because 'value' here is an uncountable noun used in a general sense. Removing the comma after 'significant' also improves fluency.

× as uh, the Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, capped, uh, his, uh, daughter named Fatma.

✓ as the Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, named his daughter Fatima.

The word 'capped' is incorrect here; the correct verb is 'named'. Also, 'Fatma' should be 'Fatima' for accuracy. The definite article 'the' before 'Prophet Muhammad' is correct.

× I would not choose because I do want to choose.

✓ I would not choose because I do not want to choose.

The sentence contradicts itself by saying 'would not choose' but then 'do want to choose'. The correct negation is 'do not want to choose' to align with 'would not choose'.

× Fatima is a very common name and every second person uh. Has the same name so because of his significant value in Islamic culture.

✓ Fatima is a very common name and every second person has the same name because of its significant value in Islamic culture.

The sentence was split incorrectly with a period after 'uh'. Also, 'his' should be 'its' to refer to the name. The phrase 'so because of' is redundant; 'because of' suffices.

× I don't know basically the difference between how Chinese name and your children now and in the past as I'm not a citizen of China.

✓ I don't basically know the difference between how Chinese name their children now and in the past as I'm not a citizen of China.

The verb 'name' needs to be in plural form 'name their children' to agree with the plural subject 'Chinese'. Also, 'basically' is better placed after 'don't' for natural word order.

× I live in Pakistan and that's why I only know the culture of fit.

✓ I live in Pakistan and that's why I only know the culture of it.

The word 'fit' is a typo and should be 'it' referring to the culture of China or the subject previously mentioned.

× So I don't know which names are popular in China. As a narcissist of China side, don't know.

✓ So I don't know which names are popular in China. As a citizen of China, I don't know.

The word 'narcissist' is incorrect and should be 'citizen'. Also, the phrase 'of China side' is incorrect; 'of China' suffices. The sentence was incomplete and needed 'I' before 'don't know'.