Jewelry— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is generally clear but contains some grammatical errors and awkward phrasing, such as "on a deck" which seems incorrect. Also, avoid redundancy and improve sentence structure for natural flow. Try to use linking words to connect ideas smoothly.

例: I don't usually wear jewelry on regular days because I prefer a simple look. However, for special occasions like weddings or religious celebrations, I like to dress up and wear jewelry that matches my outfit.

提案: Your answer has some repetition and minor grammatical mistakes, such as plural forms of 'jewelry' which is uncountable. Try to use more precise vocabulary and avoid filler phrases like 'So yeah'. Also, use linking words to connect your ideas clearly.

例: I prefer simple jewelry that complements my outfit. In particular, I like gold jewelry because it suits Asian skin tones, especially brown skin, and makes me feel more confident.

提案: There are some errors in word choice and sentence structure, such as 'special location' instead of 'special occasion' and 'match my jewelry at my outfit' which is awkward. Try to use correct collocations and clearer expressions. Also, avoid redundancy and keep sentences concise.

例: I don't often buy jewelry for myself. But on special occasions like weddings or birthdays, I like to wear jewelry that matches my outfit. If I don't have suitable pieces, I buy new ones to complete my look.

提案: Your answer conveys the idea but has grammatical errors and some repetition, such as 'if it if it' and awkward phrasing. Try to use linking words and clearer sentence structures to express your ideas more naturally and coherently.

例: People often wear jewelry for a long time because it has emotional value. For instance, jewelry inherited from a mother or given as a special gift by friends or family holds sentimental meaning, so they like to keep it close.

× I try to dress up and wear jewelries with matching with my outfits.

✓ I try to dress up and wear jewelry matching my outfits.

The word 'jewelry' is an uncountable noun and does not have a plural form. Using 'jewelries' is incorrect. Also, 'with matching with' is redundant; 'matching' alone suffices.

× I mostly like simple jewelries, whichever goes with my outfit.

✓ I mostly like simple jewelry, whichever goes with my outfit.

'Jewelry' is an uncountable noun and should not be pluralized as 'jewelries'. Use 'jewelry' regardless of quantity.

× However, I have a soft corner for gold jewelleries because I think it suits better with Asian skin, especially the brown skin, so I I feel like I look better in gold jewelry.

✓ However, I have a soft corner for gold jewelry because I think it suits Asian skin better, especially brown skin, so I feel like I look better in gold jewelry.

Again, 'jewellery' (British spelling) or 'jewelry' (American spelling) is uncountable and should not be pluralized. Also, 'suits better with' is incorrect; 'suits better' or 'suits' is correct. The phrase 'the brown skin' is unnecessary; 'brown skin' suffices.

× I usually don't like jewelry for myself.

✓ I usually don't like jewelry for myself.

This sentence is grammatically correct; no correction needed.

× However, when there is a special location like wedding, birthday or any other celebration, I like to match my jewelry at my outfit.

✓ However, when there is a special occasion like a wedding, birthday, or any other celebration, I like to match my jewelry with my outfit.

The word 'location' is incorrect here; 'occasion' is appropriate. Also, 'match my jewelry at my outfit' is incorrect; the correct preposition is 'with' to indicate coordination.

× In those cases, if I don't have something suitable, I buy new pieces to complete my look.

✓ In those cases, if I don't have something suitable, I buy new pieces to complete my look.

This sentence is correct; no correction needed.

× I think people tend to buy a jewelry for a long time if it if it has some emotional connection with them.

✓ I think people tend to keep jewelry for a long time if it has some emotional connection with them.

'Jewelry' is uncountable and should not be preceded by 'a'. Also, 'buy a jewelry for a long time' is awkward; 'keep jewelry for a long time' better expresses the intended meaning.

× For example, if it's something that they inherited from their mother or a special gift from their friends or family they wear or they want to keep it close to them.

✓ For example, if it's something that they inherited from their mother or a special gift from their friends or family, they wear it or want to keep it close to them.

The sentence is missing a comma before 'they wear' and the pronoun 'it' after 'wear' to clarify the object. This improves clarity and grammatical correctness.

× So they tend to wear the jewelry for a long.

✓ So they tend to wear the jewelry for a long time.

The phrase 'for a long' is incomplete; it should be 'for a long time' to indicate duration properly.