Jewelry— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Try to use correct vocabulary and grammar. For example, use 'jewelry' instead of 'jolly' and 'jewelry' as an uncountable noun instead of 'jewelries'. Also, make your answer more natural and concise by saying: "I used to wear jewelry often because I like it, but I stopped because my daughter tends to damage them."

例: I used to wear jewelry often because I like it, but I stopped because my daughter tends to damage them.

提案: Your answer is unclear and unnatural. Try to express your preference clearly and naturally. For example, say: "I like simple and elegant jewelry that looks good on me."

例: I like simple and elegant jewelry that looks good on me.

提案: Avoid redundancy and improve grammar. For example, say: "I used to buy jewelry, but now I don't because my daughter often damages them." This is more natural and concise.

例: I used to buy jewelry, but now I don't because my daughter often damages them.

提案: Improve clarity and grammar. For example, say: "I think people wear jewelry for a long time because it was a gift from someone special on an important occasion, so it reminds them of that person and moment."

例: I think people wear jewelry for a long time because it was a gift from someone special on an important occasion, so it reminds them of that person and moment.

× I used to wear jolly.

✓ I used to wear jewelry.

The word 'jolly' is incorrect here; the correct singular noun is 'jewelry'. This is a singular and plural issue because 'jolly' is not a correct form related to jewelry.

× I like jewelries too much.

✓ I like jewelry too much.

The word 'jewelries' is incorrect because 'jewelry' is an uncountable noun and does not have a plural form. Using 'jewelries' is a singular and plural issue.

× my daughter is damaging every jewellery I wear.

✓ my daughter is damaging every piece of jewelry I wear.

The word 'jewellery' is correct in British English but 'every jewellery' is incorrect because 'jewelry' is uncountable. We use 'every piece of jewelry' to refer to individual items. This is a singular and plural issue.

× Any kind that gets accepted by my visual eyes.

✓ Any kind that is accepted by my eyes.

The phrase 'my visual eyes' is redundant and awkward. Also, 'kind' is singular and should be followed by singular verb 'is'. This is a singular and plural issue.

× Any kind that gets accepted by my visual eyes.

✓ Any kind that is accepted by my eyes.

The verb 'gets' is less appropriate here; 'is accepted' fits better for describing preferences. This is a present tense issue.

× So I stopped buying anymore jewelries.

✓ So I stopped buying any more jewelry.

'Jewelries' is incorrect because 'jewelry' is uncountable. Also, 'anymore' should be two words 'any more' in this context. This is a singular and plural issue.

× Maybe they have received that from a special person in a special occasion and that's why they keep on wearing it for a long time to always remember this is Bishop person and the special occasion.

✓ Maybe they received it from a special person on a special occasion, and that's why they keep wearing it for a long time to always remember that person and the special occasion.

The sentence has awkward modal verb usage and phrasing. 'Have received' can be simplified to 'received' for past event. 'Keep on wearing' is better as 'keep wearing'. Also, 'this is Bishop person' is unclear and likely a mistake. This is a modal verb usage issue and sentence structure issue.