Jewelry— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is too short and unclear. Try to give a complete sentence and explain your preference clearly. Avoid using numbers or unclear words like 'minimal 1'.

例: Yes, I often wear jewelry because I like simple and minimal designs that suit my everyday style.

提案: Your answer is confusing and has grammatical errors. Try to organize your ideas clearly, use linking words, and avoid repetition. Also, use correct vocabulary and sentence structure.

例: I like simple silver and diamond jewelry because they look elegant yet casual, which matches my minimalistic style perfectly.

提案: Your answer is short but clear. However, you should avoid informal or incorrect words like 'Julie'. Try to give a full sentence and add a reason or example.

例: No, I usually don't buy jewelry myself because most of the pieces I have are gifts from my family and friends.

提案: Your answer has repetition and grammatical mistakes. Try to express your ideas clearly and avoid repeating words. Use linking words to connect your ideas logically.

例: I think some people wear jewelry for a long time because they believe it brings them luck. For example, I used to wear a ring that I considered lucky due to my superstition.

× Yes, I wear jewelry, however I like minimal 1.

✓ Yes, I wear jewelry; however, I like minimal styles.

The word 'minimal' is an adjective and needs a noun to modify. Adding 'styles' clarifies the meaning. Also, a semicolon and comma improve sentence structure.

× I just love silver and diamond simple really as I love minimal jewelry so I wear it wear diamond Julie every time everyday use that it's so look casual 1 so that's why and.

✓ I just really love simple silver and diamond jewelry because I like minimal styles, so I wear diamond jewelry every day for casual use. That's why.

The original sentence is fragmented and unclear. Reordering and adding missing words improves clarity and grammatical correctness.

× No, I don't buy Julie. Most of them are gifted.

✓ No, I don't buy jewelry. Most of it is gifted.

'Julie' is incorrect; it should be 'jewelry'. 'Most of them' is incorrect because 'jewelry' is uncountable, so 'most of it' is correct.

× What I think is that people wear jewelry for the long time as they think they the jewelry is the jewelry is lucky.

✓ I think people wear jewelry for a long time because they believe the jewelry is lucky.

The original sentence is repetitive and awkward. Simplifying and correcting the structure improves clarity.

× Same happened with me when I used to wear a ring and I had a superstition that it is lucky.

✓ The same happened to me when I used to wear a ring, and I had a superstition that it was lucky.

'Same happened with me' is incorrect; 'The same happened to me' is correct. Also, 'it is lucky' should be in past tense 'it was lucky' to match 'used to wear' and 'had'.