Jewelry— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is enthusiastic but contains grammatical errors and redundancy. Try to use simpler, clearer sentences and avoid repeating the same idea. Also, use correct prepositions and articles. For example, say "I am very fond of jewelry and wear it every day as part of my style."

例: Yes, I am very fond of jewelry and wear it every day. It is an important part of my style, and I like to mix and match different pieces to suit my outfit.

提案: Your answer is unclear and has grammatical mistakes. Try to organize your ideas logically and use linking words. Also, avoid repeating the same words unnecessarily. For example, say "I like bracelets and necklaces the most, but I also enjoy wearing earrings and other types of jewelry because I like to find pieces that match my personality and enhance my look."

例: I like bracelets and necklaces the most. However, I also enjoy wearing earrings and other types of jewelry because I like to find pieces that match my personality and enhance my overall look.

提案: Your answer is understandable but has grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. Use correct verb tenses and plural forms. Also, try to be more concise and clear. For example, say "I usually don't buy jewelry myself because my family often gives me jewelry as gifts, and I love all the pieces I have received."

例: I usually don't buy jewelry myself because my parents and siblings often give me jewelry as gifts. I really love all the pieces I have received from them.

提案: Your answer is difficult to understand due to unclear phrasing and grammar mistakes. Try to express your ideas more clearly and use linking words to connect your points. For example, say "I think people wear jewelry for a long time because they feel emotionally attached to it, especially if it was a gift from someone special."

例: I think people wear a piece of jewelry for a long time because they feel emotionally attached to it. For example, if the jewelry was a gift from someone special, it holds sentimental value and meaning.

× Yes, I'm wholly very obsessed with jewellery.

✓ Yes, I'm completely obsessed with jewellery.

The phrase 'wholly very' is redundant and incorrect. Use 'completely' or 'totally' to express full extent. 'Wholly very' is not a proper quantifier combination.

× There isn't even a single day I don't go out not wearing a jewellery.

✓ There isn't even a single day I go out without wearing jewellery.

The original sentence has a double negative and incorrect article usage with 'a jewellery'. 'Jewellery' is uncountable and does not take 'a'. Also, 'not wearing' after 'don't' creates confusion. Correct structure is 'go out without wearing jewellery'.

× I just prefer it by doing some styles with the jewellery.

✓ I just prefer it by styling with jewellery.

'The jewellery' is incorrect here because it refers to jewellery in general, which is uncountable and does not need 'the'. Also, 'doing some styles' is awkward; 'styling' is better.

× Mostly it's bracelet or necklace, but I'm also really in love with every kind of jewellery from earrings to the necklace to every other.

✓ Mostly it's bracelets or necklaces, but I'm also really in love with every kind of jewellery from earrings to necklaces and others.

'Bracelet' and 'necklace' should be plural when talking generally. 'Every other' is vague; 'others' is clearer. Also, 'the necklace' should be 'necklaces' to match the plural form.

× I'm really very that kind of person who loves to explore every jewellery to find my match to personality so I can just enhance my overall look and.

✓ I'm really that kind of person who loves to explore every piece of jewellery to find one that matches my personality so I can enhance my overall look.

'Very' is unnecessary here. 'Every jewellery' is incorrect; 'every piece of jewellery' is correct. 'Find my match to personality' should be 'find one that matches my personality'. The sentence was incomplete and needed proper ending.

× Well as a younger child I'm very spoiled by my parents and my brother and sister so I don't usually buy it myself.

✓ Well, as a younger child, I was very spoiled by my parents and my brother and sister, so I didn't usually buy it myself.

Talking about past events requires past tense verbs: 'was' and 'didn't'. 'I'm' and 'don't' are present tense and incorrect here.

× But to be very honest I received a jewellery as a gift a lot so I'm really in love with every kind of jewelries that I have which was all just gifted by someone to me so.

✓ But to be very honest, I received jewellery as a gift a lot, so I'm really in love with every kind of jewellery that I have, all of which was gifted to me by someone.

'A jewellery' is incorrect because 'jewellery' is uncountable. 'Jewelries' is incorrect plural; 'jewellery' is uncountable and does not have a plural form. Sentence structure was awkward and needed rephrasing.

× No doubt, it's definitely because they are very connected to them.

✓ No doubt, it's definitely because they are very connected to it.

'Jewelry' or 'a piece of jewelry' is singular, so pronoun should be singular 'it' instead of 'them'.

× Some people have that kind of thing with them that they are very attached to some kind of jewellery.

✓ Some people have that kind of connection with jewellery that they are very attached to it.

'That kind of thing with them' is vague and awkward. 'Some kind of jewellery' is better as 'jewellery' or 'a piece of jewellery'. Also, pronoun 'it' matches singular 'jewellery'.

× Maybe because it was given by someone special, it was gift or something.

✓ Maybe because it was given by someone special, it was a gift or something.

'Gift' is a noun and needs an article 'a' before it. The rest is correct past tense.

× Very intimacy kind of thing.

✓ A very intimate kind of thing.

'Intimacy' is a noun; the adjective form 'intimate' is needed here. Also, article 'a' is required before the phrase.

× Because some people just do all their hearts to 1 jewellery.

✓ Because some people just put all their heart into one piece of jewellery.

The original sentence is ungrammatical and unclear. Correct verb is 'put', 'all their heart' is singular, and 'one piece of jewellery' is the correct phrase.

× Have they all whole?

✓ Do they have it all?

The original sentence is ungrammatical and unclear. The corrected sentence is a possible intended meaning, but context is limited.