Snacks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is a bit unclear and contains some grammatical errors. Try to give a direct response with clear sentence structure and avoid unnecessary details. Use linking words to connect ideas smoothly.

例: I usually eat snacks during my half-hour break while studying. I often buy them from a shop near my study center.

提案: Your answer is relevant but can be improved by using better vocabulary and clearer sentence structure. Avoid repetition and use linking words to explain your opinion.

例: I don't think eating snacks is healthy because they are often oily and harmful. However, I sometimes eat them in emergencies when I am very hungry.

提案: Your answer lacks clarity and contains grammatical mistakes. Try to answer directly and provide specific details with correct grammar. Avoid informal or vague expressions.

例: When I was a child, I ate a lot of snacks, especially oily ones. As a result, I gained weight and had some liver problems.

提案: Your answer is repetitive and could be more concise. Use linking words to list your favourite snacks clearly and avoid repeating the same phrases.

例: In my free time, I like to eat snacks such as pakode, sandwiches, and patties regularly.

× Usually I eat snacks in my daily routine because I am currently studying my aisles.

✓ Usually I eat snacks as part of my daily routine because I am currently studying my aisles.

The phrase 'in my daily routine' is not idiomatic; 'as part of my daily routine' is more appropriate to express habitual action. The verb tense 'eat' is correct for habitual action, so no change needed there.

× Usually I eat snacks in my daily routine because I am currently studying my aisles.

✓ Usually I eat snacks as part of my daily routine because I am currently studying my aisles.

The preposition 'in' is incorrectly used with 'my daily routine'. The correct preposition is 'as part of' to indicate habitual activity within a routine.

× Then I have a break for half an hour, then I eat snacks from a shop near my center.

✓ Then I have a break for half an hour, and then I eat snacks at a shop near my center.

The preposition 'from' is incorrect when referring to the place where you eat snacks. 'At' is appropriate to indicate location where the action happens.

× No, it is not healthy for us because snacks are very oily and very bad for our health.

✓ No, it is not healthy for us because snacks are very oily and bad for our health.

The phrase 'very bad' is grammatically correct but redundant with 'very oily'. Simplifying to 'bad' is stylistically better. No modal verb error here, so no modal correction needed.

× I usually want to avoid to eat snacks but sometime in emergency I want to eat them.

✓ I usually want to avoid eating snacks but sometimes in an emergency I want to eat them.

The verb 'avoid' should be followed by the gerund form 'eating' not the infinitive 'to eat'. Also, 'sometime' should be 'sometimes' and 'in emergency' should be 'in an emergency'.

× Just in my childhood I eat snacks very much, that's why I'm so fatty and I have some problems in liver because of that.

✓ Just in my childhood I ate snacks very much, that's why I'm so fat and I have some problems with my liver because of that.

The verb 'eat' should be in past tense 'ate' to match 'in my childhood'. 'Fatty' is an adjective describing food, not a person; 'fat' is correct. Also, 'problems in liver' should be 'problems with my liver'.

× Just in my childhood I eat snacks very much, that's why I'm so fatty and I have some problems in liver because of that.

✓ Just in my childhood I ate snacks very much, that's why I'm so fat and I have some problems with my liver because of that.

'Fatty' describes food containing fat, not a person. The correct adjective to describe a person is 'fat'.

× Just in my childhood I eat snacks very much, that's why I'm so fatty and I have some problems in liver because of that.

✓ Just in my childhood I ate snacks very much, that's why I'm so fat and I have some problems with my liver because of that.

'Problems in liver' is incorrect; the correct preposition is 'with' to indicate health issues related to an organ.

× Oily snacks.

✓ Oily snacks.

This is a fragment and not a complete sentence, but 'Oily snacks' is plural and correctly formed. No correction needed here.

× Usually I eat snacks in my free time and I usually eat pakode and sandwich and patties in my regular basis of day.

✓ Usually I eat snacks in my free time and I usually eat pakoras, sandwiches, and patties on a regular basis during the day.

'Pakode' should be pluralized to 'pakoras' to match plural form. 'Sandwich' should be plural 'sandwiches'. The phrase 'in my regular basis of day' is incorrect; correct phrase is 'on a regular basis during the day'.