Snacks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is generally clear but contains some grammatical errors and awkward phrasing, such as "I'm not tight" which is unclear. Try to use more natural expressions and avoid redundancy. Also, organize your answer with a clear topic sentence followed by supporting details using linking words for coherence.

例: I usually don't eat snacks now because I focus on staying healthy and going to the gym. However, when I was younger, I used to have snacks every day around 4 PM. I stopped because I realized it was affecting my health negatively.

提案: Your answer addresses the question but has grammatical mistakes and unclear phrases like "By turn" and "cause to diabetes." Try to use linking words properly and provide clearer, more specific reasons. Also, avoid filler words such as "uh" and "but however" which reduce fluency.

例: I think eating snacks is generally unhealthy because they often contain added sugars and unhealthy fats, which can increase the risk of diabetes and other diseases. However, making your own snacks at home can be a healthier alternative.

提案: Your answer is relevant but quite brief and could be improved by adding more specific details and linking words to make it more coherent. Also, be careful with subject-verb agreement, for example, "snacks is" should be "snacks are."

例: Yes, definitely. When I was young, I often ate snacks, especially popular Indian snacks that are usually enjoyed with chai. This combination enhances the flavor and makes the snack time more enjoyable.

提案: Your answer is understandable but contains filler words like "uh" and some awkward phrasing. Try to be more concise and use linking words to connect ideas smoothly. Also, avoid repeating similar ideas unnecessarily.

例: I'm not very picky about snacks, but if I had to choose, my favorite would be samosas. I used to eat them quite often when I was young because I really enjoyed their spicy and crispy taste.

× I don't really eat snacks now because I'm not tight and of course there's a gym right now.

✓ I don't really eat snacks now because I'm not tight and of course there's a gym nearby.

The phrase 'there's a gym right now' is awkward and unclear. It should be 'there's a gym nearby' to correctly express the location. This is a present tense issue because the sentence describes a current situation and needs proper phrasing.

× I was a snacks person.

✓ I was a snack person.

The word 'snacks' is plural, but here it is used as a singular noun to describe a type of person. The correct singular form is 'snack person'. This is a singular and plural issue.

× I used to eat snacks every day and later I felt like it makes me unhealthy so I stopped eating after a few years.

✓ I used to eat snacks every day and later I felt like it made me unhealthy so I stopped eating after a few years.

The phrase 'it makes me unhealthy' should be in past tense 'it made me unhealthy' to match the past context of the sentence. This is a present tense issue where the tense does not agree with the time frame.

× By turn, it can have affect your body by adding unhealthy fats and added sugar.

✓ In turn, it can affect your body by adding unhealthy fats and added sugar.

The phrase 'By turn' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'In turn'. Also, 'have affect' is incorrect; it should be 'affect'. This is an incorrect use of prepositions and verb usage.

× It can cause to diabetes and lead to several other diseases.

✓ It can cause diabetes and lead to several other diseases.

The preposition 'to' after 'cause' is incorrect. The verb 'cause' should be directly followed by the noun without 'to'. This is an incorrect use of prepositions.

× But however, despite the fact uh another better opinion might be making snacks on your own.

✓ However, another better option might be making snacks on your own.

The phrase 'But however' is redundant; only one conjunction is needed. Also, 'opinion' should be 'option' to make sense. This is an incorrect conjunction use and word choice issue.

× I'm from India so the most popular snacks is usually eaten with Chai so it helps to increase the taste of the snacks as well.

✓ I'm from India so the most popular snacks are usually eaten with Chai so it helps to increase the taste of the snacks as well.

The subject 'snacks' is plural, so the verb should be 'are' instead of 'is'. This is a singular and plural issue.

× if you ask me what's my favorite snacks, I would say, uh, it's called samosa and I really like it very much.

✓ if you ask me what's my favorite snack, I would say, uh, it's called samosa and I really like it very much.

The word 'snacks' is plural but should be singular 'snack' when referring to a favorite item. This is a singular and plural issue.

× I used to eat pretty often when I was young.

✓ I used to eat it pretty often when I was young.

The sentence is missing the object 'it' referring to the snack. Adding 'it' clarifies the sentence. This is a past tense issue related to sentence completeness.