Snacks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Câu trả lời của bạn có một số lỗi ngữ pháp và cấu trúc câu không rõ ràng, làm cho ý nghĩa khó hiểu. Bạn nên tập trung vào việc trả lời trực tiếp câu hỏi với câu chủ đề rõ ràng, tránh lặp từ và sử dụng câu hoàn chỉnh, mạch lạc.

例: I usually eat snacks when I feel tired or bored because they help me feel better and give me more energy.

提案: Bạn đã trả lời khá rõ ràng và có cấu trúc tốt, tuy nhiên câu cuối có lỗi ngữ pháp nhỏ và bạn có thể sử dụng từ vựng phong phú hơn để làm câu trả lời tự nhiên hơn.

例: It depends on the type of snacks I eat. For example, eating fruits is healthy and beneficial, but consuming sugary snacks like chocolate or soft drinks can be harmful to my health.

提案: Câu trả lời của bạn có ý tưởng tốt nhưng cấu trúc câu chưa mạch lạc và có lỗi ngắt quãng. Bạn nên nối các câu lại với nhau bằng các từ nối để câu trả lời trôi chảy hơn.

例: Yes, definitely. When I was a child, snacks were one of my favorite foods because they helped me feel better and relaxed whenever I was tired or bored.

提案: Bạn đã trả lời khá đầy đủ nhưng câu cuối có lỗi ngữ pháp và từ vựng chưa chính xác. Bạn nên sử dụng từ vựng phù hợp và câu hoàn chỉnh để câu trả lời tự nhiên hơn.

例: It depends on my mood. When I feel tired or upset, I usually eat sweet snacks like chocolate or sugary drinks. However, when I feel happy or am studying, I prefer to eat something salty or sour.

× At the person I usually eat snacks when I feel tired or bored.

✓ Usually, I eat snacks when I feel tired or bored.

The original sentence has an incorrect phrase 'At the person' which does not fit the context and causes confusion. The sentence structure is incorrect. The corrected sentence removes this phrase and starts with 'Usually' to clearly express the habit.

× I something big is nice because eating snacks help helps me feel better and gain my gains my energy.

✓ Something big is nice because eating snacks helps me feel better and gain my energy.

The original sentence contains repeated words 'help helps' and 'gain my gains my' which are incorrect. Also, 'help' should be 'helps' to agree with singular subject 'eating snacks'. The phrase 'gain my energy' is more natural than 'gain my gains my energy'.

× If I eat snacks like fruits, I will become healthier of course.

✓ If I eat snacks such as fruits, I will become healthier, of course.

The phrase 'eat snacks like fruits' is less formal and can be improved by using 'such as' to introduce examples. Also, a comma is needed before 'of course' as it is an interjection.

× But if I eat snacks that are high in sugar like chocolate or sugary drinks, I think it will harm for my health.

✓ But if I eat snacks that are high in sugar, like chocolate or sugary drinks, I think it will harm my health.

The phrase 'harm for my health' is incorrect; 'harm my health' is the correct collocation. Also, a comma is needed after 'sugar' to separate the example.

× Snacks were one of my favorite foods that I like.

✓ Snacks were one of my favorite foods.

The phrase 'that I like' is redundant because 'favorite' already implies liking. Removing it makes the sentence clearer and more natural.

× When I was a child. I liked to eat snacks because it helps me feel more, feel better and relax when I feel tired or bored.

✓ When I was a child, I liked to eat snacks because they helped me feel better and relax when I felt tired or bored.

The original has a sentence fragment 'When I was a child.' which should be connected to the next sentence with a comma. Also, tense consistency is important: past tense 'helped' and 'felt' should be used to match 'liked' and 'was'. The phrase 'feel more' is unclear and removed.

× But when I feel happy or when I am studying, I usually eat something or sour.

✓ But when I feel happy or when I am studying, I usually eat something sweet or sour.

The original sentence is missing the adjective 'sweet' before 'or sour' to complete the comparison of snack types. Adding 'sweet' clarifies the meaning.