Machine— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is a bit long and unclear. Try to make your response more natural and concise by directly answering the question first, then adding a reason with linking words. Avoid repetition and grammatical errors.

例: My favourite machine at home is the washing machine because it makes cleaning clothes much easier. Since I live alone, it saves me a lot of time and effort.

提案: Your answer lacks clarity and has grammatical mistakes. Try to structure your answer with a clear topic sentence and supporting details using linking words. Be specific and avoid incomplete sentences.

例: Yes, I think both washing and sweeping machines are very important, especially for elderly people like mothers. These machines reduce hard physical work, which can be difficult for them due to back problems.

提案: Your answer is generally good but can be improved by making it more coherent and grammatically correct. Use linking words properly and complete your sentences.

例: Yes, I always read the instructions before using a machine because they explain how to operate it safely. This also helps prevent accidents like falls in the future.

提案: Your answer is repetitive and slightly unclear. Try to avoid repeating words and make your sentences more concise and natural. Use linking words to connect your ideas smoothly.

例: Yes, reading instructions is very important because they provide clear guidance on how to use the machine correctly. Without them, you might misuse the machine or damage it.

× Washing machine has because it really makes washing the clothes easier as I live alone at my home so it becomes very difficult to wash the clothes as washing machine is very automatic just need to put the clothes and all the all the things come out.

✓ I have a washing machine because it really makes washing clothes easier as I live alone at home, so it becomes very difficult to wash clothes manually. The washing machine is very automatic; you just need to put the clothes in, and everything is done.

The original sentence has singular and plural issues such as 'Washing machine has' which is incomplete and incorrect. It should be 'I have a washing machine'. Also, 'washing the clothes' is better as 'washing clothes' for general meaning. 'At my home' is better as 'at home'. The phrase 'all the all the things come out' is unclear and corrected to 'everything is done'. These corrections improve clarity and grammatical correctness.

× In my perspective, they both are really important for household people as elderly women's or our mothers.

✓ From my perspective, they both are really important for household people such as elderly women or our mothers.

The phrase 'elderly women's' incorrectly uses the possessive form instead of plural. It should be 'elderly women'. Also, 'In my perspective' is better expressed as 'From my perspective'. These changes correct plural usage and improve expression.

× They they can't do the work as these both things require like washing and sweeping requires a lot of hard work.

✓ They can't do the work because both washing and sweeping require a lot of hard work.

The original sentence has repetition ('They they') and awkward structure. 'These both things require like washing and sweeping requires' is incorrect and confusing. The corrected sentence simplifies and clarifies the meaning, fixing sentence structure errors.

× Elderly women get to have the problem in their back so.

✓ Elderly women often have problems with their backs, so...

The phrase 'get to have the problem in their back' is incorrect. It should be 'have problems with their backs' to correctly express plural and idiomatic usage. The sentence is incomplete but corrected for grammar.

× Yes, I definitely read the instructions before using a machine because it just gives the idea that how to use the machine and in future it.

✓ Yes, I definitely read the instructions before using a machine because it gives an idea of how to use the machine and helps in the future.

The phrase 'gives the idea that how to use' is incorrect; it should be 'gives an idea of how to use'. Also, 'and in future it' is incomplete and unclear; corrected to 'and helps in the future'. Modal verb usage is implied in 'definitely read' which is acceptable here.

× Also it also decreases the chance of falls which can happen.

✓ Also, it decreases the chance of falls that can happen.

The repetition 'Also it also' is redundant. The sentence structure is improved by removing redundancy and clarifying the relative clause.

× Yes, it becomes very important to read the instructions as they have all the list of the things which are to be used in the manner in the correct manner.

✓ Yes, it becomes very important to read the instructions as they have the complete list of things that are to be used in the correct manner.

The phrase 'all the list of the things' is incorrect; it should be 'the complete list of things'. Also, 'which are to be used in the manner in the correct manner' is redundant; simplified to 'that are to be used in the correct manner'. These corrections fix singular/plural and redundancy issues.

× Also also if you don't read the instructions you may not get the idea how to use it.

✓ Also, if you don't read the instructions, you may not get the idea of how to use it.

The repetition 'Also also' is redundant. The phrase 'get the idea how to use it' is missing 'of' after 'idea'. Adding commas improves sentence clarity.