Machine— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is clear but could be more natural and concise. Try to avoid redundancy and improve sentence structure for better flow. For example, start with a clear topic sentence, then add supporting details using linking words.

例: My favorite machine at home is my coffee maker, which I received as a gift from my friends two years ago. I use it daily because I love drinking coffee, making it the most useful appliance for me.

提案: Your answer has good ideas but needs clearer sentence structure and better linking words. Avoid repetition and ensure sentences are complete and grammatically correct. Use linking words like 'for example' properly to connect ideas.

例: I think washing machines and sweeping machines are very important because they are efficient and useful. For example, they significantly reduce the workload and help people manage heavy tasks more easily.

提案: Your answer is good but could be improved by using more natural phrasing and linking words. Also, avoid informal words like 'anyways' in formal speaking. Try to make your answer more concise and coherent.

例: Although the technician usually explains how to use the machine, I still read the instruction card because it offers additional insights that the technician might not mention.

提案: Your answer has good content but could be more natural and concise. Use singular or plural forms correctly and add linking words to improve coherence. Also, avoid awkward phrases like 'taken for granted by many people' without context.

例: Many people overlook reading instructions, but I believe it is very important when installing a machine. It helps prevent hazards like electric shocks and machine breakdowns.

× Favorite machine at home is my coffee maker that I received as a gift from my friends two years ago.

✓ My favorite machine at home is my coffee maker that I received as a gift from my friends two years ago.

The sentence is missing the subject 'My' at the beginning, which is necessary for proper sentence structure and clarity.

× This machine is most used by me and I love to drink coffee is the reason why this is my favorite machine.

✓ This machine is the one I use most, and I love to drink coffee, which is why this is my favorite machine.

The original sentence is awkward and lacks proper conjunctions and relative clauses. The correction improves clarity and grammatical flow by restructuring the sentence.

× Due to their efficiency and usefulness, I consider them one of the most important household machineries that a person can buy.

✓ Due to their efficiency and usefulness, I consider them some of the most important household appliances that a person can buy.

The word 'machineries' is incorrect as 'machinery' is an uncountable noun. 'Appliances' is more appropriate here, and 'some of the most important' fits better than 'one of the most important' when referring to multiple items.

× They for example, they significantly reduce the workload of an individual can help manage heavy task easily.

✓ For example, they significantly reduce the workload of an individual and can help manage heavy tasks easily.

The original sentence is fragmented and contains redundancy ('They for example, they'). The correction removes redundancy and adds the missing conjunction 'and' to connect clauses properly.

× Although the technician who installs the machine always provides instructions beforehand, I tend to read the instruction card anyways because it provides me insights that the technician could not.

✓ Although the technician who installs the machine always provides instructions beforehand, I tend to read the instruction card anyway because it provides me with insights that the technician could not.

The word 'anyways' is informal and incorrect in this context; 'anyway' is the correct form. Also, 'provides me insights' should be 'provides me with insights' for correct prepositional usage.

× Reading instructions are taken for granted by many people, but it is one of the most important things to consider when installing a machine.

✓ Reading instructions is taken for granted by many people, but it is one of the most important things to consider when installing a machine.

The subject 'Reading instructions' is singular (gerund phrase), so the verb should be 'is' instead of 'are' to agree in number.

× It can prevent and safeguard against hazards such as electric shocks and breakdown of machines.

✓ It can prevent hazards such as electric shocks and breakdowns of machines and safeguard against them.

The phrase 'prevent and safeguard against hazards' is awkward. 'Prevent hazards' and 'safeguard against them' are clearer. Also, 'breakdown' should be plural 'breakdowns' to match 'hazards'.