Machine— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 你的回答有些重复和语法错误，表达不够自然。建议简化句子结构，避免重复，并使用更准确的词汇。

例: My favourite machine at home is the vacuum cleaner. It helps me clean up the hair and dust in my room quickly and effectively, which is difficult to do with a broom.

提案: 回答较简短，表达不够流畅。建议使用连接词丰富句子，并改进语法错误，使表达更自然。

例: Yes, I believe both washing machines and vacuum cleaners are essential in households because they help share the housework and reduce people's stress.

提案: 回答中有语法错误和重复，表达不够连贯。建议简化句子，使用连接词，并注意语法正确性。

例: Yes, I always read the instructions before using a machine because I am not familiar with all types, and there are many different machines on the market.

提案: 回答中有语法错误，表达不够自然。建议使用正确的时态和更流畅的句子结构。

例: Yes, it is very important to read the instructions before using a machine because there are more and more types available on the market nowadays.

× As a girl there are many sheds here in my room every day, which is hard, which is hard to clean up by brooms.

✓ As a girl, there is a lot of shed hair in my room every day, which is hard to clean up with brooms.

shed是动词，表示脱落（毛发等），这里应使用名词hair来表达“脱落的头发”。另外，many sheds（许多棚子）用词错误，应改为不可数名词hair。brooms前应使用介词with。

× which is hard, which is hard to clean up by brooms.

✓ which is hard to clean up with brooms.

清洁工具前应使用介词with，而不是by。by通常用于被动语态中表示动作的执行者。

× So it helps me to get rid of all my shed hair easily and thoroughly.

✓ So it helps me to get rid of all my shed hair easily and thoroughly.

此句无复数错误，shed hair用法正确，无需修改。

× Yes, I think both of them are very essential in households.

✓ Yes, I think both of them are very essential in households.

此句中both of them用法正确，无需修改。

× They can share the housework and the release people's pressure.

✓ They can share the housework and relieve people's pressure.

release是“释放”，此处应使用动词relieve，表示“缓解压力”。且the release结构错误，应去掉the。

× Yes, it's a crucial process. Process for me to read the information before I use a machine because I not have a good command of all of the machines.

✓ Yes, it's a crucial process for me to read the information before I use a machine because I do not have a good command of all the machines.

重复使用process导致句子结构混乱，应合并为一句。否定句中缺少助动词do，正确形式为do not have。all of the machines中of可省略。

× So and there are various type of machines in the market.

✓ And there are various types of machines in the market.

type为可数名词，表示“种类”，应使用复数types。句首的So和And连用不合适，应去掉So。

× Yes, of course it's very crucial to read the instruction before you using a machine you know.

✓ Yes, of course it's very crucial to read the instructions before you use a machine, you know.

instruction应使用复数形式instructions。you using应改为you use，保持动词原形。

× Now there are more and more types of machines when it comes to the market.

✓ Now there are more and more types of machines coming to the market.

when it comes to the market结构不自然，改为现在分词短语coming to the market更符合表达习惯。