Machine— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Speak more clearly and concisely. Start with a direct topic sentence, avoid repetition and grammar errors, and add one specific supporting detail using a linking word. Use correct pronouns and verb forms (e.g., "I am a person who cares about my diet").

例: My favourite machine at home is my air fryer because it makes cooking quick and healthy. For example, I can roast vegetables with very little oil, which helps me stick to my diet.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence and one or two concise, specific reasons connected by linking words. Correct grammar (plural/singular agreement) and avoid vague phrases like "so much benefit."

例: Yes, I think they are essential because people have busy schedules. For instance, a washing machine saves hours each week, and a robotic sweeper keeps my floors clean with minimal effort.

提案: Provide a direct answer first, then one clear reason using correct grammar and avoid double negatives. Reduce filler words (uh, like). Use linking words such as "however" or "otherwise."

例: I usually read the instructions if I'm unfamiliar with a device. However, if I already know it, I prefer to try it practically because hands-on experience helps me learn faster.

提案: Answer directly and concisely with correct pronouns and tense. Use one linking word to contrast the two situations and give a brief rationale. Avoid awkward phrases like "well known for it."

例: Yes, it is important to read instructions if you are unfamiliar with a machine because it prevents mistakes. On the other hand, if you have used it many times, you may not need to read them again.

× I do say it is my air fryer because because of it, it's very easy to cook my food.

✓ I would say my air fryer is my favourite because it makes cooking very easy.

Issues: redundant auxiliary 'do' and repeated 'because', awkward clause order and word choice. This falls under sentence structure errors (26) and incorrect use of adjectives/adverbs (13). Suggestion: Use 'I would say' for a polite opinion, place the subject and verb together ('my air fryer is my favourite') and simplify the reason clause to 'because it makes cooking very easy.'

× I am little a person who take care of my diet so I think their fry is the best machine.

✓ I am a person who cares about my diet, so I think the air fryer is the best machine.

Problems: incorrect article placement 'little a person' and wrong verb form 'take' (subject-verb agreement), and incorrect pronoun 'their fry' instead of 'the air fryer'. These map to article errors (22), pronoun errors (12) and subject-verb agreement (27). Suggestion: Use 'I am a person who cares' and the correct noun 'the air fryer.'

× Yes, nowadays it is very important because everybody is busy in their hectic schedules and they don't have time to spend so much time for their washing clothes and their dishes.

✓ Yes, nowadays they are very important because everybody is busy with hectic schedules and doesn't have much time to wash their clothes or dishes.

Problems: mismatch between singular/plural 'it is very important' referring to plural machines, awkward preposition 'in their hectic schedules', redundancy 'time to spend so much time', and wording 'for their washing clothes'. These map to subject-verb agreement (27) and pronoun/preposition use (12 and 11). Suggestion: Use plural verbs for plural subjects ('they are'), correct preposition 'busy with', and concise phrasing 'doesn't have much time to wash their clothes or dishes.'

× So these machines give so much benefit.

✓ So these machines provide many benefits.

Problems: unnatural collocation 'give so much benefit' and uncountable/countable issue. This is a sentence structure error (26) and quantifier/adjective choice (13/14). Suggestion: Use 'provide' and plural 'benefits' or 'a lot of benefit.'

× If I'm not a familiar with the thing, then I do read the instructions.

✓ If I am not familiar with something, then I read the instructions.

Problems: incorrect article 'a familiar' (should be 'familiar' without article) and unnecessary auxiliary 'do' in positive statement. Maps to article errors (22) and subject-verb usage (27). Suggestion: Use 'If I am not familiar with something' and simple present 'I read.'

× Otherwise, uh, I just like try it manually first because I think uh, you cannot learn nothing from reading other than do a practical.

✓ Otherwise, I try it myself first because I think you cannot learn anything from reading; you have to practice.

Problems: awkward 'like try it manually', incorrect reflexive/pronoun choice, double negative 'cannot learn nothing', and awkward phrase 'do a practical.' These are sentence structure errors (26), present tense/verb forms (6), and incorrect pronoun/reflexive use (15/12). Suggestion: Say 'I try it myself' and replace double negative with 'cannot learn anything' and 'you have to practice.'

× If somebody is not familiar with the machine which he is operating then they should read the instructions.

✓ If somebody is not familiar with the machine they are operating, they should read the instructions.

Problems: gender-specific 'he' conflicting with singular 'somebody' and inconsistent pronoun 'they' used later. This is incorrect pronoun use (12) and subject-verb concerns (27). Suggestion: Use singular 'they' consistently: 'If somebody is not familiar with the machine they are operating, they should read the instructions.'

× Otherwise if they already used it and they are well known for it so then they can leave it.

✓ Otherwise, if they have already used it and are familiar with it, they can skip the instructions.

Problems: incorrect past tense 'used' where present perfect 'have used' is better for experience, awkward 'well known for it' and redundant 'so then'. These are present tense/tense choice (6) and sentence structure errors (26). Suggestion: Use present perfect 'have already used' and 'familiar with' and a concise verb 'skip the instructions.'