Machine— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Improve clarity and coherence: start with a clear topic sentence naming the machine (e.g. 'water flosser' or 'oral irrigator'), then briefly explain why you like it with specific reasons. Use correct vocabulary (flosser, braces, toothbrush) and simple linking words (because, so) and correct grammar (tenses, articles). Keep to 2–3 concise sentences.

例: My favourite machine at home is a water flosser. I recently had dental treatment and wear metal braces, so a water flosser cleans the gaps around the wires much better than a regular toothbrush, which helps keep my teeth and gums healthy.

提案: Focus on accurate vocabulary and sentence completion: name the machines correctly (washing machine, vacuum cleaner) and give one clear reason with an example. Use linking words (for example, because) and avoid unfinished sentences. Keep answers within 2–3 complete sentences.

例: Yes, I think washing machines and vacuum cleaners are very important because they save time and effort. For example, you can load the washing machine and do other tasks while it runs, and a vacuum cleaner cleans quickly when you are busy.

提案: Organize into a topic sentence plus a supporting detail: state clearly you read manuals, then give a specific example with correct vocabulary (model, manual, safety precautions) and correct grammar. Use linking phrases (for example, so that, to avoid) to show purpose.

例: Yes, I always read the manual before using a machine. For example, when I bought a new water flosser last year, I read the instructions carefully so that I could use it safely and avoid damaging the device.

提案: Make a clear statement then support it with specific reasons: say reading instructions is important, mention concrete benefits (safety, correct assembly, longer product life) and use correct linking words (because, so). Fix grammar and word choice (accident, prevent). Keep it concise (2–3 sentences).

例: Yes, I think it is important to read the instructions because manuals explain safety precautions and correct assembly. Reading them helps prevent accidents and avoid damaging the product, so it will last longer.

× My favorite machine at home is my water process.

✓ My favorite machine at home is my water flosser.

The student used 'water process' which is not a correct noun for the device that cleans between teeth. This is a word choice error (adjective/noun usage). Suggest using the correct noun 'water flosser' or 'oral irrigator' to convey the intended meaning.

× I recently had a dental treatment and wear metal brace so a normal toolbox can clean well around the wire.

✓ I recently had dental treatment and wore metal braces, so a normal toothbrush cannot clean well around the wires.

Multiple errors: tense and verb form plus pronoun/word choice. 'Wear' should be past tense 'wore' (Past tense issue) and 'metal brace' should be plural 'metal braces'. 'Toolbox' is incorrect; likely 'toothbrush'. Also 'can' should be 'cannot' to express inability. Fix by using past tense and correct nouns.

× The water flow so which the gap and keep my seats and come much cleaner.

✓ The water flows through the gaps and keeps my teeth much cleaner.

This sentence contains several structural and verb form issues. Use third-person singular 'flows' and correct preposition 'through'. 'Seats' is incorrect — should be 'teeth'. 'Keep' must agree with subject: 'keeps'. Rearrange words into a clear subject-verb-object order.

× I think washing machine and far complainer are important because they let you clean more truly and without much effort.

✓ I think washing machines and floor cleaners are important because they let you clean more thoroughly and with less effort.

Use plural 'washing machines' and correct noun 'floor cleaners' (not 'far complainer'). 'Truly' is the wrong adverb here; use 'thoroughly'. Also change 'without much effort' to the more natural 'with less effort'.

× They are especially useful for people with busy schedule.

✓ They are especially useful for people with a busy schedule.

Missing article 'a' before 'busy schedule'. This is an article/quantifier issue: use 'a busy schedule' or plural 'busy schedules' depending on context.

× For example, we can just load closer on washing machine and let it run while doing another task to save time and.

✓ For example, we can just load clothes into the washing machine and let it run while doing another task to save time.

Multiple errors: 'closer' should be 'clothes' (word choice). Add article 'the' before 'washing machine'. Use preposition 'into' with 'load', and remove the trailing 'and'. Ensure sentence completes idea.

× Yes, I always read the manual before using a machine.

✓ Yes, I always read the manual before using a machine.

This sentence is correct; no change needed. It uses simple present to express habitual action appropriately.

× For example, last year I bought water closer.

✓ For example, last year I bought a water flosser.

'Bought' is correct past tense, but 'water closer' is incorrect noun. Add article 'a' and correct noun to 'water flosser'.

× It was my first time using it, so I read the instruction carefully to know how do you see safely what are the precaution and to prevent a lot of damage from happening.

✓ It was my first time using it, so I read the instructions carefully to learn how to use it safely, what the precautions are, and how to prevent damage.

This sentence has incorrect word order and mixed questions. Change 'instruction' to plural 'instructions'. Replace 'to know how do you see safely' with 'to learn how to use it safely'. Reorder 'what are the precaution' to 'what the precautions are'. Simplify 'prevent a lot of damage from happening' to 'prevent damage'.

× I think winning the instruction is very important and manual tell you safety precaution the correct assembly staff.

✓ I think reading the instructions is very important, and the manual tells you safety precautions and the correct assembly steps.

Multiple issues: 'winning' is wrong word — should be 'reading' (verb choice). Add definite article 'the' before 'manual'. Use plural 'precautions' and correct noun 'assembly steps' instead of 'assembly staff'. Ensure subject-verb agreement: 'manual tells'.

× I wish happy with an accident and stop you from damaging the product so it will last longer.

✓ It will make you happy by preventing accidents and stop you from damaging the product so it will last longer.

Original sentence has incorrect pronoun use and awkward structure. 'I wish happy with an accident' is incorrect; replace with 'It will make you happy by preventing accidents'. Ensure logical subject ('it' meaning reading instructions) and clarify purpose. Keep result clause 'so it will last longer'.