Memory— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Improve grammatical accuracy and avoid repetition. Use past and present tenses correctly and reduce redundancy for clarity. Also, add linking words to connect ideas smoothly.

例: When I was young, I was good at memorizing things; however, as I have grown older, I have found it more challenging, perhaps due to my age. For example, I sometimes forget where I put my keys.

提案: Use more precise vocabulary and avoid vague phrases like 'I don't know'. Also, improve sentence structure and add linking words to enhance coherence.

例: Yes, once when I applied for a Chinese visa, I forgot to bring the most important document, my passport. Recently, I have been quite forgetful, possibly due to stress or aging.

提案: Clarify expressions and use appropriate vocabulary. For example, use 'breastfeed' or 'feed milk' instead of 'needs to milk'. Also, improve sentence flow with linking words.

例: As a mother, I need to remember to feed my baby whenever she is hungry. Otherwise, she might miss out on essential nutrients, which could affect her health.

提案: Improve sentence structure and grammar. Use linking words to connect ideas and avoid redundancy. Also, use more natural expressions.

例: I usually set reminders on my phone to help me remember important tasks. This method enables me to stay organized and manage my responsibilities effectively.

× When I was young I can say that I was good at memorizing things, but when I get older I I noticed that memorizing things had been a challenge for me.

✓ When I was young I could say that I was good at memorizing things, but when I got older I noticed that memorizing things had been a challenge for me.

The modal verb 'can' is incorrectly used in the past context; it should be 'could' to indicate ability in the past. Also, 'get' should be in past tense 'got' to maintain past tense consistency.

× When I was young I can say that I was good at memorizing things, but when I get older I I noticed that memorizing things had been a challenge for me.

✓ When I was young I could say that I was good at memorizing things, but when I got older I noticed that memorizing things had been a challenge for me.

The verb 'get' should be in past tense 'got' to maintain consistency with the past time frame of the sentence.

× Yes, when I applied for Chinese visa I forgot to bring the most important thing which is the password.

✓ Yes, when I applied for a Chinese visa I forgot to bring the most important thing, which was the password.

The verb 'is' should be changed to 'was' to match the past tense context. Also, 'Chinese visa' needs an article 'a' before it.

× Yes, when I applied for Chinese visa I forgot to bring the most important thing which is the password.

✓ Yes, when I applied for a Chinese visa I forgot to bring the most important thing, which was the password.

The noun phrase 'Chinese visa' requires the indefinite article 'a' because it refers to one visa among many.

× Maybe because of my age, like I forget keys sometimes.

✓ Maybe because of my age, I forget keys sometimes.

The phrase 'like' is unnecessary and incorrect here; removing it improves sentence clarity and correctness.

× Lately I have been a forgetful person and I don't know why.

✓ Lately, I have been a forgetful person and I don't know why.

A comma after 'Lately' improves sentence clarity; no grammatical error otherwise.

× Now that I am a mom, I always remind myself to feed my baby at a time where she needs to milk, otherwise it would get me in trouble and my baby won't be able to get the nutrients that she needed in her daily life.

✓ Now that I am a mom, I always remind myself to feed my baby when she needs milk; otherwise, it would get me in trouble and my baby wouldn't be able to get the nutrients she needs in her daily life.

The phrase 'at a time where' is incorrect; 'when' is the correct conjunction. 'Needs to milk' is incorrect; it should be 'needs milk'. Also, 'would get me in trouble' is correct, but 'won't be able' should be 'wouldn't be able' to maintain conditional mood. 'She needed' should be 'she needs' to indicate ongoing need.

× To remember important things, I usually put in the reminders of my phone because sometimes I tend to forget things.

✓ To remember important things, I usually put them in the reminders on my phone because sometimes I tend to forget things.

The phrase 'put in the reminders of my phone' is incorrect; it should be 'put them in the reminders on my phone' to correctly use the preposition 'on' for phone apps and include the object 'them'.

× So enable for me to be able to stay organized and manage things appropriately, I always put it in my reminders.

✓ So, to enable me to stay organized and manage things appropriately, I always put them in my reminders.

The original sentence is awkward and ungrammatical. 'So enable for me to be able' is incorrect; it should be 'So, to enable me to'. Also, 'put it' should be 'put them' to refer to multiple reminders.