Memory— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and grammatically correct. Start with a clear topic sentence that directly answers the question, then add one brief supporting detail. Avoid run-on phrases and correct article and verb forms (e.g., "a valuable skill I learned" → "a very valuable skill I learned").

例: Yes, I am quite good at memorising things. I developed this ability when I was young because I enjoyed learning poems and facts, and practising them regularly helped me retain information easily.

提案: Provide a clear, concise response with coherent linking and correct tense/form of verbs. Begin with a direct answer, follow with a brief description of the event, include your reaction, and correct small grammar points (e.g., "elder sister" → "older sister", "apologized her" → "apologized to her").

例: Yes, I have. Last month I forgot my older sister's birthday, which was embarrassing. She was upset, so I apologised to her and gave her a book to make up for it.

提案: Answer directly and coherently with correct tense and fewer irrelevant opinions. State the main thing you must remember, then add one or two specific details about how or why. Avoid unfinished sentences and contradictory statements. Keep to two or three short sentences.

例: I need to remember my daily homework and study schedule. Because I have several subjects, I make a simple checklist each evening so I don't forget anything the next day.

提案: Give a structured answer with clear linking words and specific methods. Start with a topic sentence naming your main strategies, then list two clear techniques using linking words (e.g., "first", "also"). Be specific about tools and routines and avoid vague phrases like "so many other factors."

例: I use a few simple methods to remember important things. First, I set reminders and write notes on my phone; second, I repeat the information aloud or visualise names to fix them in my memory.

× Absolutely one of the most valuable skill which I learned at a very young age due to my high interest in memorizing things.

✓ Absolutely, memorising things is one of the most valuable skills I learned at a very young age because I was highly interested in them.

The noun 'skill' should be plural 'skills' to match 'one of the most'; word order and connectors improved for clarity; 'due to my high interest in memorizing things' is awkward, so use 'because I was highly interested in them'. Also add a comma after 'Absolutely' and use consistent verb tense 'learned'.

× Last month I forgot my elder sister's birthday which was really embarrassing for me and also shameful as well because she was very upset so I apologized her and also gave a book.

✓ Last month I forgot my elder sister's birthday, which was really embarrassing and shameful because she was very upset, so I apologized to her and gave her a book.

Run-on sentence corrected with commas and conjunctions; 'apologized her' is incorrect — English requires 'apologize to someone'; add 'to her' after 'gave' for clarity; avoid redundant phrases 'also' and 'as well'. Maintain past tense consistency.

× In my regular life, I have to remember my homework, which was really disappointing and I I'm not really fascinated about completing my homework. So it was really.

✓ In my daily life, I have to remember my homework, which I find disappointing because I'm not really interested in completing it.

Tense and phrasing were mixed and awkward ('was really disappointing' conflicts with general statement 'have to remember'); remove repeated 'homework' and fix contractions ('I I'm' wrong). Use 'interested' instead of 'fascinated about' and make sentence complete; remove fragment 'So it was really.'

× There are several ways, which is how I remember important things. Firstly, I can put name in my mind and along with I can also write down the model and name on my phone notes and so many other factors.

✓ There are several ways I remember important things. Firstly, I can memorize a name mentally, and I can also write the name and details in my phone notes, among other methods.

Relative clause 'which is how I remember' is unnecessary and ungrammatical here; 'put name in my mind' is non-native phrasing — use 'memorize a name mentally'; 'along with I can also' is incorrect pronoun/connector use; 'model and name' unclear so changed to 'name and details'; 'so many other factors' replaced with 'among other methods' for clarity.