Chocolate— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 你的回答表达了观点和原因，但句子结构和用词可以更自然流畅。注意复数形式和避免重复表达。

例: No, I don't like eating chocolate because it's too sweet for me. Moreover, eating too much chocolate can lead to tooth decay, which concerns me. Therefore, I usually avoid it.

提案: 回答中有语法错误和用词不当（cheese应为teeth），建议注意词汇准确性和句子通顺。

例: I haven't eaten chocolate for about a month because I think it's harmful to my teeth. Besides, I don't really like the taste, so I usually avoid it.

提案: 回答语法错误较多，时态和主谓一致需改进，表达应更清晰自然。

例: No, I didn't eat chocolate often as a child because my grandma usually monitored my diet and didn't allow me to eat it, so I rarely had the chance.

提案: 回答内容不够具体，句子结构不完整，建议用更连贯的句子和具体原因说明。

例: Chocolate is popular worldwide because of effective promotion. For example, books like "Chocolate Kingdom" encourage children to enjoy it, and TV advertisements often showcase chocolate culture to attract buyers.

提案: 回答中有重复词和语法错误，表达不够连贯，建议简洁明了并注意时态和词序。

例: My favorite flavor is milk chocolate because it's sweet and creamy. When I was a child, eating it brought me happy memories that I still cherish.

提案: 回答中有语法错误和表达不自然，建议注意主谓一致和简洁表达。

例: Yes, I think giving chocolate as a gift is a good idea because many people enjoy sweets. Your friends will be happy to receive it.

× Also, eating too much chocolates can cause teeth decay which worries me.

✓ Also, eating too much chocolate can cause tooth decay which worries me.

'Chocolate' is an uncountable noun here, so 'much' should be used instead of 'many' and 'chocolates' should be singular. 'Teeth decay' is incorrect; the correct term is 'tooth decay' which is uncountable.

× I haven't eaten chocolate for about one month because I think it is quite harmful to my cheese.

✓ I haven't eaten chocolate for about one month because I think it is quite harmful to my teeth.

The word 'cheese' is incorrect in this context; the correct word is 'teeth' as chocolate can harm teeth, not cheese.

× No I'm not because when I was a child my grandma usually check my diet and he want me not to eat it so I don't have any opportunities to get it.

✓ No, I didn't because when I was a child my grandma usually checked my diet and she wanted me not to eat it so I didn't have any opportunities to get it.

The sentence requires past tense verbs 'didn't', 'checked', and 'wanted' to match the past time frame. Also, pronouns 'he' should be 'she' referring to grandma.

× No I'm not because when I was a child my grandma usually check my diet and he want me not to eat it so I don't have any opportunities to get it.

✓ No, I didn't because when I was a child my grandma usually checked my diet and she wanted me not to eat it so I didn't have any opportunities to get it.

The pronoun 'he' is incorrect when referring to 'grandma'; it should be 'she'.

× The main reason of it is to promote chocolate culture around the world.

✓ The main reason for it is to promote chocolate culture around the world.

The correct preposition after 'reason' is 'for', not 'of'.

× For example, a book named Chocolate Kingdom to encourage children to buy it.

✓ For example, a book named Chocolate Kingdom encourages children to buy it.

The original sentence lacks a verb; adding 'encourages' completes the sentence structure.

× Other than that, the TV advertisement often shows chocolate culture in many ways to attract people's attention to buy it.

✓ Other than that, TV advertisements often show chocolate culture in many ways to attract people's attention to buy it.

'TV advertisement' should be plural 'TV advertisements' to match 'often show' and general meaning.

× My favorite favorite flavor of chocolate is milk chocolate because it is sweet and creamy.

✓ My favorite flavor of chocolate is milk chocolate because it is sweet and creamy.

The word 'favorite' is repeated unnecessarily; it should appear only once.

× I enjoy it too very well in When I was the Child, especially in some sections when I ate it.

✓ I enjoyed it very much when I was a child, especially at times when I ate it.

The sentence has incorrect word order and tense; 'enjoy' should be past tense 'enjoyed', 'too very well' is incorrect, and 'When I was the Child' should be 'when I was a child'.

× I will remind some happy memories.

✓ It reminds me of some happy memories.

The original sentence is awkward; 'It reminds me of some happy memories' is the correct expression.

× Yes, I think giving chocolate as a gift is a good idea because it is the sweets that many people enjoy it.

✓ Yes, I think giving chocolate as a gift is a good idea because it is a sweet that many people enjoy.

'It is the sweets' is incorrect; 'chocolate' is singular and uncountable here, so 'a sweet' or 'a treat' is better. Also, 'enjoy it' is redundant after 'it is'.

× Your friend were happy to get it.

✓ Your friend was happy to get it.

The subject 'friend' is singular, so the verb should be 'was' not 'were'.