Chocolate— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 답변이 자연스럽지 않고 중복되는 표현이 많으며 문법적 오류가 있습니다. 좀 더 명확하고 간결하게 자신의 생각을 표현하는 연습이 필요합니다. 예를 들어, 'I like eating chocolate, but I try to limit it because it can make me gain weight due to its high sugar content.'처럼 말할 수 있습니다.

例: I like eating chocolate, but I try to limit it because it can make me gain weight due to its high sugar content.

提案: 답변이 불명확하고 반복적인 표현이 많습니다. 구체적인 빈도를 명확하게 말하고, 이유를 간결하게 설명하는 연습이 필요합니다. 예를 들어, 'I usually eat chocolate once or twice a week because I try to control my sugar intake.'라고 말할 수 있습니다.

例: I usually eat chocolate once or twice a week because I try to control my sugar intake.

提案: 답변이 다소 중복되고 문법적 오류가 있습니다. 과거와 현재를 비교할 때 명확한 문장 구조를 사용하고, 이유를 간결하게 표현하는 연습이 필요합니다. 예를 들어, 'Yes, I used to eat more chocolate when I was a child because I wasn't worried about my weight then.'라고 말할 수 있습니다.

例: Yes, I used to eat more chocolate when I was a child because I wasn't worried about my weight then.

提案: 답변이 불명확하고 어색한 표현이 많습니다. 초콜릿의 인기에 대한 자신의 의견을 명확하고 자연스럽게 표현하는 연습이 필요합니다. 예를 들어, 'I think chocolate is popular worldwide because it is a traditional comfort food that many people enjoy.'라고 말할 수 있습니다.

例: I think chocolate is popular worldwide because it is a traditional comfort food that many people enjoy.

提案: 답변이 불명확하고 문법적으로 부자연스럽습니다. 좋아하는 맛을 명확히 말하고 그 이유를 간결하게 설명하는 연습이 필요합니다. 예를 들어, 'My favourite flavour is hazelnut-filled chocolate because I enjoy the nutty taste it adds.'라고 말할 수 있습니다.

例: My favourite flavour is hazelnut-filled chocolate because I enjoy the nutty taste it adds.

提案: 답변이 중복되고 어색한 표현이 있습니다. 초콜릿을 선물로 주는 것에 대한 의견을 명확하고 자연스럽게 표현하는 연습이 필요합니다. 예를 들어, 'Yes, I think chocolate makes a perfect gift because it gives a comforting feeling and makes the recipient feel special.'라고 말할 수 있습니다.

例: Yes, I think chocolate makes a perfect gift because it gives a comforting feeling and makes the recipient feel special.

× I have a limitations to uh when it comes to chocolate eating because it makes me more chubbier and too fat of sugar.

✓ I have limitations when it comes to eating chocolate because it makes me chubbier and too fat from sugar.

'Limitations' should be plural without 'a' because 'a' is used with singular nouns. Also, 'chocolate eating' is better expressed as 'eating chocolate'. 'More chubbier' is incorrect because 'chubbier' already implies comparison; 'more' is redundant. 'Too fat of sugar' is incorrect; it should be 'too fat from sugar' or better 'makes me gain too much fat due to sugar.'

× maybe one or two in a, uh, one or two week.

✓ maybe one or two in a week.

'One or two week' is incorrect; it should be 'one or two weeks' to match plural form after 'one or two'.

× I just eat it once because I have a limitation to when it comes to the eating chocolate.

✓ I just eat it once because I have a limitation when it comes to eating chocolate.

'A limitation to when it comes to the eating chocolate' is awkward and incorrect. It should be 'a limitation when it comes to eating chocolate'. Also, 'the eating chocolate' is incorrect; 'eating chocolate' is correct.

× I used to eat chocolate in my childhood when compared to now and I at at that time, I was not, uh, so worried about my weight.

✓ I used to eat chocolate in my childhood compared to now, and at that time, I was not so worried about my weight.

The phrase 'when compared to now' is better placed after 'childhood' for clarity. The repeated 'at at' is a mistake. The sentence structure is improved by removing unnecessary fillers and correcting word order.

× That's, that's because I eat chocolate more.

✓ That's because I ate more chocolate.

Since the speaker is referring to past habits, the past tense 'ate' should be used instead of present tense 'eat'.

× I think the chocolate has the certain, uh, traditional, uh. Comfort food that became worldwide.

✓ I think chocolate is a certain traditional comfort food that has become worldwide.

'The chocolate' is incorrect here; 'chocolate' as a general noun does not need 'the'. 'The certain' is incorrect; 'a certain' is correct. 'Comfort food' should not be capitalized. 'That became worldwide' should be 'that has become worldwide' for present perfect tense.

× I like hazelnut, uh, filled chocolate one because I uh, when I like a chocolate and that always had a feeling that tastes cha hazelnut.

✓ I like hazelnut-filled chocolate because when I eat chocolate, it always has a hazelnut taste. I don't know why, but it happens.

'Hazelnut, uh, filled chocolate one' is awkward; 'hazelnut-filled chocolate' is correct. 'When I like a chocolate' is incorrect; it should be 'when I eat chocolate'. 'That always had a feeling that tastes cha hazelnut' is unclear and grammatically incorrect; corrected to 'it always has a hazelnut taste'.

× Yes, I think it is a perfect, perfect gift style and because uh, chocolate has a certain, uh, comforting feeling that when we receive it and feel special.

✓ Yes, I think it is a perfect gift and chocolate has a certain comforting feeling that makes us feel special when we receive it.

'Gift style' is incorrect; 'gift' is sufficient. The sentence structure is improved by removing unnecessary conjunctions and clarifying the meaning. 'That when we receive it and feel special' is incomplete; corrected to 'that makes us feel special when we receive it.'