Singing— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Try to make your answer more natural and concise by avoiding repetition and grammatical errors. Use a clear topic sentence and support it with specific reasons. For example, instead of repeating 'sing', say 'I enjoy singing because it helps me relieve stress during my free time.'

例: Yes, I enjoy singing because it helps me relieve stress and relax during my free time.

提案: Avoid repetition and improve sentence structure for clarity. Start with a direct answer, then add supporting details with linking words. For example, 'Yes, I learned to sing in grade 12 when my music teacher helped me. Thanks to that, I have improved a lot.'

例: Yes, I learned to sing in grade 12 when my music teacher helped me. Thanks to that, I have improved a lot.

提案: Make your answer more natural by correcting grammar and using linking words. Start with a clear topic sentence and add specific details. For example, 'I want to sing for my mother because she loves old songs. Therefore, I am learning them to make her happy.'

例: I want to sing for my mother because she loves old songs. Therefore, I am learning them to make her happy.

提案: Your answer is unclear and contains grammatical errors. Use linking words to organize your ideas logically. For example, 'Yes, I think singing brings happiness because many people sing when they feel upset. Music helps them relax and feel comfortable in difficult situations.'

例: Yes, I think singing brings happiness because many people sing when they feel upset. Music helps them relax and feel comfortable in difficult situations.

× Yes, I like singing, it helped me to get out from my stress and I love to sing sing a song in my free time.

✓ Yes, I like singing because it helps me get out of my stress, and I love to sing songs in my free time.

The original sentence is a run-on sentence combining multiple ideas without proper conjunctions or punctuation. Also, 'helped' should be 'helps' to match the present tense context, and 'get out from my stress' should be 'get out of my stress'. Repeating 'sing' is redundant. Correcting these improves clarity and grammatical correctness.

× Yes, when I when I was in my in my grade 12, my music teacher helped me to sing a song and with that help today I am a good singer.

✓ Yes, when I was in grade 12, my music teacher helped me sing a song, and with that help, today I am a good singer.

The sentence has repeated words ('when I when I', 'in my in my') which are errors. Also, 'helped me to sing' is better as 'helped me sing' for naturalness. Adding commas improves readability. These corrections fix redundancy and improve sentence flow.

× I want to sing for my mother because she loves to listen these old songs and now I'm going to learn all the old songs so I can make feel her happy.

✓ I want to sing for my mother because she loves to listen to these old songs, and now I'm going to learn all the old songs so I can make her feel happy.

The phrase 'listen these old songs' is incorrect; it should be 'listen to these old songs' because 'listen' requires the preposition 'to'. Also, 'make feel her happy' is incorrect; the correct order is 'make her feel happy'. These corrections fix preposition and word order errors.

× Yes, singing brings happiness to the people because people when are there. Mostly most of the people like to sing when they are upset or not able to do any task because music feels them relax and comfortable at any situation so people love to sing it.

✓ Yes, singing brings happiness to people because when they are there, mostly most people like to sing when they are upset or not able to do any task because music makes them feel relaxed and comfortable in any situation, so people love to sing.

The original sentence has pronoun errors such as 'music feels them relax' which should be 'music makes them feel relaxed'. Also, 'at any situation' should be 'in any situation'. The phrase 'people when are there' is unclear and likely a fragment; it was adjusted for clarity. These corrections address pronoun misuse and improve sentence clarity.