Singing— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Good start — you answered directly and gave reasons. To improve, make the response more concise and natural: state your main idea in one clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details linked with a connector (for example, "because" or "so"). Avoid redundancy (e.g., "then art drawing"). Also keep it within four to five short sentences.

例: I don't really enjoy singing now because my interests changed as I grew older. I used to be a chorister as a child, but later I developed hobbies like dancing and drawing, which I prefer. So I rarely sing these days except for special occasions.

提案: Your answer addresses the question but has grammar and clarity issues. Use correct verbs ("learned how to sing"), avoid contradiction in sentence structure, and combine ideas with linking words. Provide a clear reason and one specific detail about attempts or obstacles.

例: Yes, I have learned how to sing a few times, but I struggled with pitch and tone. I even planned to enrol in formal singing classes, but I couldn't attend because of work commitments. Therefore I did not continue formal training.

提案: Strong personal answer with specific detail — keep the language more concise and fix small phrasing issues ("on the phone or on television"). Use one linking word to explain why singing helps your daughter and give a short example or situation.

例: I would love to sing for my daughter because she prefers live singing to music played on the phone or television. When I sing to her before bed, she calms down quickly and seems happier and more energetic the next morning.

提案: Your response is relevant but contains repetition and some awkward phrasing. Use clearer linking phrases (e.g., "for example", "as a result") and more precise vocabulary ("uplifts the mood", "motivated"). Limit to two or three sentences with a concise example.

例: Yes, singing can lift people's mood. For example, if someone is having a rough day, listening to uplifting songs or singing along can make them feel more motivated and ready to carry on with their tasks.

× No, I do not really like singing, although I was a chorister when I was a child.

✓ No, I do not really like singing, although I was a chorister when I was a child.

Sentence is correct; past tense 'was' correctly describes a past state. No change needed.

× But as I grew older I developed interest in other hobbies like dancing and then art drawing.

✓ But as I grew older I developed an interest in other hobbies like dancing and art drawing.

Missing article 'an' before 'interest' is an article error related to noun usage. Adding 'an' makes the noun phrase grammatically correct. Also remove 'then' which is unnecessary and unnatural in this context.

× Yes, I have learnt how to sync couple of times but the problem was that my tone was not pleasing.

✓ Yes, I have learnt how to sing a couple of times, but the problem was that my tone was not pleasing.

The verb 'sync' is a spelling error; correct form 'sing'. Also add the article 'a' before 'couple' to form the idiom 'a couple of times'. This keeps present perfect for learning experiences and past tense for the past problem.

× Although I decided to enroll in some singing classes but I was not available.

✓ Although I decided to enroll in some singing classes, I was not available.

Using both 'although' and 'but' is redundant; remove 'but' and use a comma after the subordinate clause. 'Was not available' is acceptable if meaning was 'I was unavailable'.

× Who do you want to sing for?

✓ Who do you want to sing for?

Sentence is grammatically correct as a question; no change needed.

× I would love to sing for my daughter.

✓ I would love to sing for my daughter.

Sentence is correct; conditional 'would love to' appropriately expresses desire.

× I realized earlier that she prefers someone singing to her than listening to music on the phone or in television, and this helps her feel very relaxed and energized.

✓ I realized earlier that she prefers someone to sing to her rather than listening to music on the phone or on television, and this helps her feel very relaxed and energized.

Use the infinitive 'someone to sing to her' instead of 'someone singing to her'. Use 'rather than' instead of 'than' for contrasts. Use preposition 'on' with 'television'. These changes correct verb form and preposition use.

× Yes, singing uplifts the the mood of someone.

✓ Yes, singing uplifts the mood of someone.

There is a duplicated 'the the' — remove the extra 'the'. The article 'the' before 'mood' is acceptable here as referring to a specific person's mood.

× For example, someone might be having a rough day and if the person listens to so lifting songs, the person gets the zeal to continue working or doing things.

✓ For example, someone might be having a rough day, and if the person listens to uplifting songs, they get the energy to continue working or doing things.

Replace 'so lifting songs' with 'uplifting songs' (correct word choice). Use a comma before 'and'. Replace repetitive 'the person' with singular 'they' to avoid clumsiness; 'they' is acceptable as a singular gender-neutral pronoun. Replace 'zeal' with 'energy' for natural collocation.

× Effectively.

✓ It is effective.

Single-word fragment 'Effectively.' is a sentence fragment without a subject and verb. Replace with a full sentence like 'It is effective.' or attach it to the previous sentence (e.g., '...doing things; it is effective.'). This fixes sentence structure.