Shoes— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Perbaiki tata bahasa dan gunakan kalimat yang lebih alami serta langsung menjawab pertanyaan. Hindari pengulangan dan buat kalimat lebih singkat dan jelas.

例: I don't like buying shoes very much and I rarely buy them. I usually have one or two pairs that I wear occasionally.

提案: Perbaiki tata bahasa dan ejaan, serta gunakan kalimat yang lebih alami dan jelas. Gunakan kata penghubung untuk membuat jawaban lebih koheren.

例: Yes, I have bought shoes online. I like it because it's easy to choose the color, size, and model that I want.

提案: Perbaiki tata bahasa dan ungkapkan jumlah uang dengan cara yang lebih jelas dan alami. Jelaskan alasan dengan kalimat yang lebih tepat dan singkat.

例: I rarely buy shoes, so I usually spend less than $100 on them. I don't feel comfortable buying many pairs.

提案: Perbaiki tata bahasa dan gunakan kalimat yang lebih alami dan jelas. Gunakan kata penghubung untuk menjelaskan alasan dengan lebih baik.

例: I prefer comfortable shoes because they can be worn on many occasions. Therefore, I don't have to worry about which shoes to choose.

× I'm not really like buying shoes and I don't really often to buy shoes.

✓ I don't really like buying shoes and I don't often buy shoes.

The phrase 'I'm not really like' is incorrect; the correct form is 'I don't really like'. Also, 'I don't really often to buy shoes' is incorrect because 'often' is an adverb and should not be followed by 'to'. The correct form is 'I don't often buy shoes'. Explanation: 'like' is a verb that requires 'do not' for negation, and 'often' modifies the verb directly without 'to'.

× I prefer to have one or two shoes that are that I use with occasionally.

✓ I prefer to have one or two pairs of shoes that I use occasionally.

The word 'shoes' is plural, but 'one or two shoes' is awkward; the correct expression is 'one or two pairs of shoes' because shoes come in pairs. Also, 'that are that I use with occasionally' is redundant and incorrect; it should be 'that I use occasionally'. Explanation: Use 'pairs of shoes' to refer to multiple shoes worn together, and avoid redundant phrases.

× I really love to bought sauce online because the easy to pick which color and which size that I use and then I have to choose the model of the shoes very easily.

✓ I really love to buy shoes online because it's easy to pick which color and size I use, and then I can choose the model of the shoes very easily.

The verb 'bought' is the past tense and should not follow 'to'; the correct form after 'to' is the base verb 'buy'. Also, 'sauce' is a typo and should be 'shoes'. 'The easy' should be 'it's easy'. 'Which size that I use' should be 'which size I use'. Explanation: After 'to', use the base form of the verb; correct typos and use proper sentence structure.

× Because I'm rarely to buy shoes, so my spend on money in buying shoes is less than $101,000.

✓ Because I rarely buy shoes, my spending on shoes is less than $101,000.

The phrase 'I'm rarely to buy shoes' is incorrect; 'rarely' is an adverb and should be followed by the base verb without 'to'. 'My spend on money in buying shoes' is awkward; the correct phrase is 'my spending on shoes'. Also, 'Because' and 'so' together is redundant; 'Because' alone is sufficient. Explanation: Use adverbs correctly with verbs, avoid redundancy, and use proper noun forms for actions.

× I prefer to comfortable shoes.

✓ I prefer comfortable shoes.

The phrase 'prefer to comfortable shoes' is incorrect; 'prefer' is followed directly by the noun or gerund without 'to' in this context. The correct form is 'I prefer comfortable shoes'. Explanation: 'Prefer' can be followed directly by a noun without 'to' when expressing preference.

× It is because with comfortable shoes we can use the shoes in any in any other occasion.

✓ It is because with comfortable shoes we can wear them on any other occasion.

The phrase 'use the shoes in any in any other occasion' is incorrect. The verb 'use' is less appropriate for shoes; 'wear' is better. Also, the preposition 'in' should be 'on' when referring to occasions. The repetition of 'in any' is redundant. Explanation: Use appropriate verbs and prepositions for context and avoid repetition.