Shoes— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is somewhat unclear and contains grammatical errors. Try to respond directly with a clear opinion and use correct expressions. Also, avoid redundancy and keep your answer concise within 5 sentences. Use linking words to connect ideas logically.

例: I don't particularly enjoy or dislike buying shoes because they are essential for my daily life. The frequency of my purchases depends on the types of shoes I need for work. For example, if my job requires formal shoes, I buy them when necessary. Overall, I buy shoes only when I need to replace old ones or require a new style.

提案: Your answer has grammatical mistakes and unclear phrases like 'created an over experience'. Try to express your experience clearly and use linking words to explain the problem logically. Also, avoid redundancy and keep your answer natural and concise.

例: Yes, I have bought shoes online once. However, it was a disappointing experience because the shoes did not fit properly. Moreover, the size was different from what was stated on the website. As a result, I was unable to use them and had to return the order.

提案: Your answer is unclear and contains grammatical errors. Try to give a direct answer with specific details and use linking words to explain your reasoning. Also, avoid vague expressions like 'a few 100' and be more precise.

例: I usually spend around 200 to 300 pounds on shoes. I avoid buying expensive shoes just because of their brand, as I think it is not cost-effective. Instead, I prefer shoes that offer good quality and comfort at a reasonable price.

提案: Your answer is somewhat awkward and contains unnatural phrases like 'consisting both of them' and 'attract the eyeballs'. Try to express your preference clearly and use natural vocabulary. Also, use linking words to connect your ideas logically.

例: I prefer shoes that are both fashionable and comfortable. Not only do I like to look stylish, but I also want to feel comfortable when wearing them. Therefore, I choose shoes that balance these two qualities and offer good value for money.

× I neither hate or like buying shoes as shoes are essential on my daily life and the frequency depends on how many types of shoes are required for my work.

✓ I neither hate nor like buying shoes as shoes are essential in my daily life and the frequency depends on how many types of shoes are required for my work.

The conjunction 'or' should be replaced with 'nor' after 'neither' to correctly express the negative correlation. Also, the preposition 'on' should be 'in' when referring to 'daily life'.

× I neither hate or like buying shoes as shoes are essential on my daily life and the frequency depends on how many types of shoes are required for my work.

✓ I neither hate nor like buying shoes as shoes are essential in my daily life and the frequency depends on how many types of shoes are required for my work.

The preposition 'on' is incorrect when referring to 'daily life'; the correct preposition is 'in'.

× I have bought shoes online for once.

✓ I have bought shoes online once.

The phrase 'for once' is incorrect here; 'once' alone is sufficient to indicate a single occurrence. 'For once' is used differently, often to express surprise or emphasis.

× At that time it created an over experience to me as the shoes are not fit in the size and the size is not as stated as the website.

✓ At that time, I had a bad experience because the shoes did not fit and the size was not as stated on the website.

The original sentence is awkward and unclear. 'Created an over experience to me' is incorrect; 'had a bad experience' is appropriate. Also, 'are not fit in the size' should be 'did not fit'. The preposition 'as stated as the website' should be 'as stated on the website'. Verb tenses should be consistent in past tense.

× At that time it created an over experience to me as the shoes are not fit in the size and the size is not as stated as the website.

✓ At that time, I had a bad experience because the shoes did not fit and the size was not as stated on the website.

The preposition 'in' is incorrect after 'fit'; the correct phrase is 'fit the size' or simply 'did not fit'. Also, 'as stated as the website' should be 'as stated on the website'.

× I usually spend around a few 100 on shoes because it is not cost effective when I'm purchasing shoes only due to their famous brand.

✓ I usually spend around a few hundred on shoes because it is not cost effective to purchase shoes only because of their famous brand.

The phrase 'a few 100' is incorrect; it should be 'a few hundred'. Also, 'when I'm purchasing shoes only due to their famous brand' is awkward; 'to purchase shoes only because of their famous brand' is clearer.

× I prefer the shoes consisting both of them.

✓ I prefer shoes that combine both qualities.

The phrase 'consisting both of them' is incorrect. 'Consisting of' requires an object, and 'both of them' is vague. 'Combine both qualities' is clearer and grammatically correct.

× Not only can I attract the eyeballs from people, but also I can feel cozy and cost effective from purchasing shoes.

✓ Not only can I attract attention from people, but I can also feel comfortable and that purchasing shoes is cost effective.

'Attract the eyeballs from people' is awkward; 'attract attention from people' is better. 'Feel cozy and cost effective from purchasing shoes' is incorrect; 'feel comfortable' and 'feel that purchasing shoes is cost effective' are correct. The placement of 'also' should be after 'but'.