Shoes— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is somewhat unclear and contains grammatical errors and redundancy. Try to give a clear, concise response directly addressing the question, with a topic sentence followed by supporting details using linking words. Avoid filler words and unclear phrases.

例: I don't really enjoy buying shoes. I usually buy new ones only when my old shoes are worn out, which happens about every three months.

提案: Your answer is relevant but could be more fluent and natural. Use linking words to connect your ideas and avoid repetition. Also, use more precise vocabulary and correct grammar.

例: No, I have never bought shoes online because I think it's risky. You can't be sure if the shoes will fit well, and sometimes the color or style looks different from the pictures in the store.

提案: Your answer has some unclear parts and grammatical mistakes. Try to organize your answer clearly with correct grammar and use linking words to connect ideas. Also, be specific and consistent with numbers and currency.

例: It depends on the type of shoes. For sneakers, I usually spend about $20, but basketball shoes are more expensive. I usually buy them only when they are on discount, so I might spend around $30 to $90.

提案: Your answer is clear and relevant but could be improved by using more natural expressions and linking words. Also, avoid filler words like 'like' and improve sentence structure for fluency.

例: I definitely prefer comfortable shoes because uncomfortable ones can cause foot pain or even injuries. Moreover, comfortable shoes help me walk long distances without any problems.

× Not really I I'm not a big fan of buying shoes but usually our boards and because umm the shoes were broken or worn out so I would change my shoes when it is not available and also I think it's about. Uh, shoes perm 3 months I guess.

✓ Not really. I'm not a big fan of buying shoes, but usually I buy new ones because my shoes are broken or worn out. So I change my shoes when they are not usable. Also, I think it's about every 3 months.

The original sentence is a run-on with unclear meaning and missing subjects. It lacks proper punctuation and has confusing phrases like 'our boards' and 'shoes perm 3 months'. The correction breaks it into clear sentences, uses correct subjects and verbs, and clarifies the intended meaning.

× No, I have never bought shoes online because I think buying shoes online is a little bit risky because you can't really be sure that the shoes really fit on you.

✓ No, I have never bought shoes online because I think buying shoes online is a a little bit risky since you can't really be sure that the shoes really fit you.

The phrase 'fit on you' is incorrect; the correct expression is 'fit you' without the preposition 'on'. Shoes fit a person, so 'fit you' is the proper usage.

× And I'm not sure about the outlook, the color. Is it same as the just the real store?

✓ And I'm not sure about the look or the color. Is it the same as in the real store?

The original sentence uses 'outlook' incorrectly; 'look' is the correct word for appearance. Also, 'Is it same as the just the real store?' is ungrammatical and unclear. The correction clarifies the meaning and corrects pronoun and article usage.

× If it's a basketball shoes that that will be really expensive and usually I'll only bought it when it is on the discount.

✓ If it's basketball shoes, they will be really expensive, and usually I only buy them when they are on discount.

The original sentence incorrectly uses 'bought' (past tense) after 'I'll' (I will), which is a modal verb indicating future. Also, 'a basketball shoes' is incorrect because 'shoes' is plural. The correction uses present tense 'buy' to match the habitual action and corrects plural agreement.

× If it's just a sneakers I'll I'll say about $2002.00

✓ If it's just sneakers, I'll say about $200 or $2002.00.

The phrase 'a sneakers' is incorrect because 'sneakers' is plural and cannot be preceded by 'a'. The correction removes the article 'a' to match plural noun usage.

× So maybe around 3090 dollars.

✓ So maybe around 30 to 90 dollars.

The original phrase '3090 dollars' is unclear and likely a typo. The correction clarifies the intended range by adding 'to' between numbers.

× I would say definitely comfortable shoes because uncomfortable shoes may cost you your feet pain or even injuries and also comfortable shoes can like make you through the long walking or long distance.

✓ I would definitely say comfortable shoes because uncomfortable shoes may cause foot pain or even injuries. Also, comfortable shoes can help you walk long distances.

The original sentence uses 'cost you your feet pain' which is incorrect; 'cause foot pain' is correct. The phrase 'can like make you through the long walking or long distance' is awkward and ungrammatical. The correction uses proper verbs and clearer phrasing.