Shoes— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and avoid fillers (umm, uh). Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details with a linking word. Mention a concrete example (type of shoe) to make your answer more specific.

例: Yes — I enjoy buying shoes. I usually buy a pair each month because I exercise daily, so I need running shoes that wear out quickly. For example, I replace my trainers after about four weeks to keep good support and prevent injuries.

提案: Remove hesitations and use past simple clearly. Provide one concise reason and one specific detail about the purchase (brand, size, delivery). Use a linking word like 'because' or 'so' to connect ideas.

例: Yes, I bought a pair online last year because they were on sale and the color matched my workout gear. The delivery was fast and the shoes fit well, so I was very satisfied.

提案: Correct the unit (use currency) and give a specific average price range. Start with a clear topic sentence, then explain the variation with a linking word and examples of types and prices.

例: I usually spend around 50 to 80 dollars on a pair of everyday running shoes. However, it depends on the brand and features — for example, high-end trainers can cost over 150 dollars, while basic sneakers are closer to 30 dollars.

提案: Make the answer fluent and natural: give a clear topic sentence, a concise reason, and a brief example of lifestyle to support your choice. Avoid repetitions and informal phrases like 'gonna'.

例: I prefer comfortable shoes to fashionable ones because foot health matters more to me. For example, I choose cushioned trainers for long walks since my lifestyle involves daily exercise and comfort helps prevent pain.

× I usually buy new shoes every month because I love to do exercise every single day.

✓ I usually buy new shoes every month because I love exercising every single day.

The verb 'exercise' should be in the -ing form after 'love to' or 'love' when expressing enjoyment of an activity. Using 'love to do exercise' is wordy; 'love exercising' is more natural.

× Yes, there is a time that I bought a shoes uh, from my website online and uh, I really, really liked the color.

✓ Yes, there was a time that I bought shoes from a website online and I really, really liked the color.

'A shoes' mixes singular article 'a' with plural noun 'shoes' — incorrect. Also 'there is a time that I bought' should match past tense 'there was a time that I bought'. Use 'bought shoes' (no article) or 'bought a pair of shoes'.

× I usually don't buy uh, from websites, but this time I felt that uh, it's a really, really good deal.

✓ I usually don't buy from websites, but this time I felt that it was a really, really good deal.

The clause 'it is' should match past context 'this time I felt', so 'it was' is correct. Also remove filler 'uh' for clarity. Preposition 'from websites' is acceptable; main issue was tense consistency.

× I usually spend around 500 grams.

✓ I usually spend around 500 yuan.

'Grams' measures weight, not money. Use an appropriate currency or 'dollars/pounds/yen' etc. If the speaker meant a price, replace the unit with a currency; if they meant weight, clarify context. Also consider adding a currency symbol or word for clarity.

× Of course it depends on the type of shoes, what brand, the colors, the features that it has.

✓ Of course it depends on the type of shoes: the brand, the color, and the features they have.

The original mixes singular/plural and has awkward listing. Use parallel structure ('the brand, the color, and the features') and match number ('they have' for plural 'shoes').

× Of course, I prefer I more comfortable shoes rather than fashionable shoes because, uh, my health is more important than the looks that I'm gonna give to the outward and, uh, it's actually more suitable to my lifestyle.

✓ Of course, I prefer more comfortable shoes rather than fashionable ones because my health is more important than the appearance I give to the outside, and it's actually more suitable for my lifestyle.

Several issues: 'I prefer I more comfortable shoes' has an extra 'I' and wrong word order — remove the extra pronoun and use 'prefer more comfortable shoes'. 'Fashionable shoes' can be shortened to 'fashionable ones' for parallelism. 'Looks that I'm gonna give to the outward' is ungrammatical; use 'the appearance I give to the outside' or better 'how I appear to others'. Use 'suitable for my lifestyle' rather than 'to my lifestyle'. Also avoid informal 'gonna' in formal speech.

× So, umm, I often like to change uh, the shoes that I wear, uh, for instance.

✓ So, umm, I often like to change the shoes that I wear, for instance.

This sentence mainly has filler words; grammatically it's acceptable after removing fillers. No third-person singular verb error here; corrected version removes unnecessary pauses and maintains subject-verb agreement.