Shoes— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 回答较自然，但存在赘述与停顿（“umm”），句子较长且有些重复（例如“so I can wear it for a longer time”与“saves me the time to choose new shoes”信息重复）。建议：①开头直接给出主题句并简洁回答频率（例如："I buy shoes about twice a year."）；②用一到两句具体原因支持，并用连接词（because / so / therefore）保持逻辑；③避免填充词，控制在最多5句内。练习时可先组织三部分：直接回答 + 一到两个原因 + 简短结论。

例: I buy shoes about twice a year. I prefer buying well-made shoes because they last longer and save me time in the long run. Therefore, I only shop occasionally rather than frequently.

提案: 内容完整但表达有语法与用词错误（如“convenient to shopping”应为“convenient to shop”或“convenient for shopping”，“re receive”为重复），语句偏长且有填充词。建议：①使用清晰的句子结构（例如："Yes. I usually try shoes in stores, then buy online."）；②用一两个连词列出具体优点（because, so, and）；③注意动词搭配与时态，避免重复词。

例: Yes. I usually try shoes on in stores but then buy them online. I do this because online shopping is more convenient, allows me to compare prices easily, and offers reliable after-sales service.

提案: 回答清楚但有重复与小错误（如“which you which can”），句子较冗长。建议：①先给出明确数字和单位，然后一到两句解释原因；②避免重复表达“good quality”与“not that high”的概念，可用更精炼的词汇（e.g. “reasonable”）；③注意主谓一致和从句连接，控制总句数。

例: I usually spend around CN¥500 per pair. I consider this a reasonable price because it buys good quality that lasts longer, so I can avoid frequent repairs or replacements.

提案: 观点明确但表达有语法与用词问题（“have a long walking”应为“walk for long periods”或“walk long distances”），有填充词“uh”和结构稍笨重。建议：①直接给出立场并用两至三点具体理由支持；②用连接词（for example, moreover）使逻辑更顺畅；③注意自然搭配与习惯表达，避免口头填充词。

例: I prefer comfortable shoes. For one thing, my daily style is quite casual, so flashy shoes wouldn't match. Moreover, I value comfort because I often walk long distances and need shoes that support my feet all day.

× Well, not really, I'm not that keen on buying new shoes, so I guess the frequency might be about twice a year because I'd like to buy shoes with good quality umm so I can wear it for a longer time.

✓ Well, not really. I'm not that keen on buying new shoes, so I guess the frequency is about twice a year because I'd like to buy shoes of good quality so I can wear them for a longer time.

句子中存在时态与代词一致的问题：将“might be”改为更确定的现在时“is”以符合说话者陈述习惯；“buy shoes with good quality”不太地道，改为“buy shoes of good quality”；“so I can wear it”中“it”应与复数“shoes”一致，改为“them”。建议：注意主谓时态一致，使用与名词数一致的代词，以及用更自然的固定搭配（of good quality）。

× So it just saves me the time to choose new shoes.

✓ So it just saves me time choosing new shoes.

原句中“saves me the time to choose new shoes”有冗余的定冠词和不太自然的动词短语。常用表达为“save someone time doing something”，因此改为“saves me time choosing new shoes”。建议：学习常见的固定搭配，省略不必要的冠词。

× Yes, actually I buy all my shoes online but I will try them first in the offline stores.

✓ Yes, actually I buy all my shoes online, but I try them first in offline stores.

这里使用“will try”表示将来，但说话者描述的是习惯性行为，应使用一般现在时“try”。此外“不定冠词+offline stores”通常省略“the”。建议：描述习惯用一般现在时，注意冠词使用。

× I think the reason is that is it is very convenient to shopping online because you can compare the prices and umm re receive the parcels without spending much time to go to offline shops and you can also enjoy the after sales service.

✓ I think the reason is that it is very convenient to shop online because you can compare prices and receive parcels without spending much time going to offline shops, and you can also enjoy after-sales service.

错误包括：冗余词序“that is that is it is”应为“that it is”；“to shopping”中动词形式错误，应为不带to的动词原形“shop”；“compare the prices”可简化为“compare prices”；“re receive”是拼写重复，应为“receive”；“spending much time to go”结构不自然，改为“spending much time going”；“the after sales service”通常为“after-sales service”。建议：注意从句结构，动词形式，避免重复拼写，使用更自然的动名词结构和常见搭配。

× I usually spend about CN¥500 on each pair of shoes because I think it's an appropriate price which you which can buy a pair of shoes with good quality and this price is not that high.

✓ I usually spend about CN¥500 on each pair of shoes because I think it's an appropriate price at which you can buy a pair of shoes of good quality, and this price is not that high.

原句有多处问题：短语“which you which can”含重复错误，应改为关系代词结构“at which you can”；“buy a pair of shoes with good quality”改为更地道的“buy a pair of shoes of good quality”；在“price”后使用介词“at”引导关系从句更准确。建议：学习正确使用关系代词和介词短语，以及“of good quality”的固定表达。

× I just don't like to sacrifice the quality to have some price competitive edge because it will take me more time to repair it.

✓ I just don't like to sacrifice quality to gain a price competitive edge because it will take me more time to repair them.

问题包括：不需要定冠词“the quality”，应为泛指“quality”；“to have some price competitive edge”结构笨拙，改为“to gain a price competitive edge”；代词“it”应与前文“shoes”复数一致，改为“them”。建议：注意量词与冠词使用，以及代词与先行词数的一致。

× Firstly, my daily dressing code is not that fashionable, so too fashionable shoes may not suit me well.

✓ Firstly, my daily dressing code is not that fashionable, so overly fashionable shoes may not suit me.

原句“too fashionable shoes”语义稍弱且“too”后通常接形容词而非直接修饰名词，更自然的表达为“overly fashionable shoes”；句尾“suit me well”可以简化为“suit me”。建议：选择更地道的程度副词并简化表达。

× Besides, I think uh the function of a pair of shoes is to enable you to wear them comfortably to have a long walking.

✓ Besides, I think the function of a pair of shoes is to enable you to walk comfortably for a long time.

原句结构混乱：“wear them comfortably to have a long walking”不符合英语习惯。应把动词“walk”放入主要结构，使用“walk comfortably for a long time”表示长时间行走。建议：把动作（walk）作为主要谓语，使用正确的副词和时间状语搭配（for a long time）。