Rules— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and direct. Start with a clear topic sentence stating that yes, there are rules, then give one or two specific examples (e.g. exam rules, dress code). Avoid repetition and filler words (uh, umm). Use correct grammar (singular/plural agreement) and clearer phrase order.

例: Yes — my school has several rules. For example, exam rules are strict: students caught cheating face suspension, and cameras are sometimes used to monitor exams. There is also a dress code that all students must follow.

提案: Give a clear opinion first (yes/no/it depends), then explain with two concise reasons. Use linking words like 'however' or 'on the other hand' to contrast benefits and disadvantages. Complete your thoughts instead of trailing off.

例: It depends on the rule. For example, CCTV cameras can reduce cheating and improve safety; however, they can also make students feel watched and limit personal freedom. So schools should balance security with respect for privacy.

提案: Provide a clear topic sentence and one specific example of how a teacher was dedicated (what they did). Use past tense consistently and avoid filler words. Add a linking phrase to structure the supporting detail.

例: Yes, I had two very dedicated teachers in high school. For example, my math teacher stayed after class twice a week to help me with problems, and she responded to my questions patiently, which improved my grades.

提案: State your preference clearly in one sentence, then give one or two specific and complete reasons. Correct grammar (fewer rules, crucial rules) and avoid repetition. Finish your answer with a concluding sentence.

例: I prefer fewer rules at school, but I think a few essential rules are necessary. For instance, strict rules against cheating are important to keep exams fair, and basic safety rules ensure students are protected.

提案: Begin with a concise topic sentence ('Yes, I have had strict teachers'), then give a specific example describing one strict behaviour and its effect on you, using linking words like 'for example' and 'as a result'. Use correct verb forms and reduce repetition.

例: Yes, I have had strict teachers. For example, one teacher enforced silence and strict seating rules, and as a result I felt I lacked freedom and was less motivated to participate in class.

提案: Answer directly and briefly. State your preference and give one clear reason. Avoid hedging and filler. Use correct grammar (I don't want to work, I wouldn't be able to) and keep to 2–3 sentences maximum.

例: No, I would not like to work in a rule-free school. I think some rules help maintain discipline, and without them I would find it difficult to teach effectively because students might not take lessons seriously.

× Whenever in school, there are lot of rule that the the in it was my educational institution announced it to the student.

✓ Whenever I am at school, there are a lot of rules that my educational institution announces to the students.

Sentence has multiple structure problems: missing subject for 'Whenever in school' and incorrect word order. 'There are lot of rule' needs article 'a' and plural 'rules'. 'that the the in it was my educational institution announced it to the student' is ungrammatical; correct relative clause is 'that my educational institution announces to the students.' Suggestion: start with a clear subject and use correct plural forms and relative clause order.

× Especially they uh, strongly concentrating on umm during our exam.

✓ Especially, they strongly concentrate on students during exams.

Original uses '-ing' form 'concentrating' without auxiliary and misplaces adverb. Use simple present 'concentrate' for habitual action. 'During our exam' should be plural 'exams' for general meaning. Suggestion: use simple present and place adverb before main verb.

× For those who cheat, they can look at the punishment.

✓ For those who cheat, they face punishment.

'can look at the punishment' is unnatural and implies possibility rather than consequence. Use present simple 'face' to describe the usual result. Suggestion: express consequences with 'face' or 'will be punished.'

× I think it's depend on the rule uh, that the school umm follow.

✓ I think it depends on the rule that the school follows.

Subject-verb agreement: 'it' requires third-person singular verb 'depends.' In relative clause 'school' requires 'follows' (third-person singular). Suggestion: ensure verbs agree with their subjects.

× For example, uh, when they put a CCTV in the class, this is the rule from the school.

✓ For example, when they install a CCTV camera in the classroom, it is a rule of the school.

Awkward phrasing and article use: 'put a CCTV in the class' should be 'install a CCTV camera in the classroom.' 'this is the rule from the school' is better as 'it is a rule of the school.' Suggestion: use precise nouns and correct prepositional phrases.

× Even though that umm, the school catch up everyone in the class but student doesn't have freedom.

✓ Even though the school monitors everyone in the class, students don't have freedom.

'catch up everyone' is wrong verb and 'student doesn't' mismatches plural. Use 'monitors' and plural 'students don't.' Remove unnecessary 'that' and 'but.' Suggestion: match subject and verb number and choose correct verbs.

× I think it's depend on the rule uh, that the school umm follow. For example, uh, when they put a CCTV in the class, this is the rule from the school. Even though that umm, the school catch up everyone in the class but student doesn't have freedom. But some rule like.

✓ I think it depends on the rules that the school follows. For example, when they install CCTV cameras in the classroom, that is a school rule. Even though the school monitors everyone in the class, students don't have freedom. But some rules, like those against cheating, are acceptable.

Combined fragment had incomplete sentence 'But some rule like.' Provide complete clause and correct pluralization and verb forms. Suggestion: finish thoughts and keep subject-verb agreement.

× Yes I have like 2 teacher who are really dedicated.

✓ Yes, I have had two teachers who were really dedicated.

'2 teacher' should be plural 'two teachers.' Also tense adjusted to past 'have had' or 'had' if referring to past experience; 'were' for past description. Suggestion: use plural nouns with numerals and correct tense.

× They are approachable for me.

✓ They were approachable for me.

Tense consistency: speaker refers to past teachers so use past 'were.' 'Approachable for me' is acceptable but 'approachable to me' or 'I found them approachable' is more natural. Suggestion: maintain consistent tense and prefer 'I found them approachable.'

× We when I have a concern or uh even like a question they always answer me when I study in my high school.

✓ When I had a concern or a question while I was in high school, they always answered me.

Original mixes tenses and has misplaced words. Use past tense 'had' and 'answered' for past events, and place time phrase 'while I was in high school' correctly. Suggestion: keep chronological order and consistent past tense.

× I personally prefer only a fewer role at school.

✓ I personally prefer fewer rules at school.

'a fewer role' is incorrect: 'fewer' pairs with plural nouns 'rules,' and 'role' is wrong word. Remove 'a' before 'fewer.' Suggestion: use 'fewer' with countable plurals and choose correct noun 'rules.'

× Only the umm the the the the rule that are crucial, especially restrictly on cheating for the for anyone who cheat during the exam, that is a crucial 1 and another one is like.

✓ Only the rules that are crucial, especially those that strictly prohibit cheating during exams, are necessary.

Many errors: plural 'rules,' spelling 'restrictly' wrong (use 'strictly'), agreement 'rule that are' should be 'rules that are,' 'anyone who cheat' needs 'anyone who cheats.' Remove fragment 'and another one is like.' Suggestion: simplify and use correct verb forms and adverbs.

× I experienced it starting with a few teachers that are strictly especially regarding the school role, even though the school don't actually strict, but they really follow that rule so much.

✓ I experienced this with a few strict teachers, especially regarding school rules. Even though the school itself wasn't very strict, those teachers enforced the rules strongly.

'that are strictly' wrong; need adjective 'strict' for teachers. 'school don't actually strict' incorrect: 'school wasn't very strict.' 'follow that rule so much' unnatural; use 'enforced the rules strongly.' Suggestion: use adjectives for people and adverbs for verbs, and match subject-verb agreement.

× So I feel that I don't have independent and freedom at all.

✓ So I felt that I had no independence or freedom at all.

Use noun 'independence' not adjective 'independent.' Past tense 'felt' matches earlier past context; use 'no' with nouns. Suggestion: choose correct noun forms and maintain tense.

× So when the time turned to their class, I don't have feeling to study at all.

✓ So when it was time for their class, I didn't feel like studying at all.

Tense inconsistency: use past 'didn't feel' and gerund 'studying.' 'the time turned to their class' is unnatural; use 'it was time for their class.' Suggestion: use natural time expressions and correct tense with gerunds.

× I personally don't like a work as a teacher even though in the UH a rule a rule free school, I don't feel that I able to uh teach or guide other students to have a good knowledge because I don't know how to teach them actually.

✓ I personally don't want to work as a teacher, even in a rule-free school; I don't feel that I would be able to teach or guide students effectively because I don't know how to teach them.

Several errors: 'don't like a work' should be 'don't want to work.' 'in the UH a rule a rule free school' unclear — intended 'in a rule-free school.' Use modal 'would be able to' for ability in hypothetical situation. 'have a good knowledge' unnatural; use 'teach effectively' or 'help them learn.' Suggestion: use correct verbs, articles, and modals for hypothetical statements.