Hobby— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and natural: start with a clear topic sentence, then give 1–2 specific examples with brief reasons. Avoid vague phrases like "and so on." Use linking words to connect ideas.

例: I enjoy mostly sports. For example, I play badminton and table tennis regularly because they keep me fit and are social activities. I also go hiking occasionally to relax and enjoy nature.

提案: Provide a clear topic sentence, avoid irrelevant or awkward details (like health consequences) unless framed smoothly, and add one specific example or reason using linking words.

例: Yes, I loved reading as a child. For instance, I often read adventure stories every evening, which improved my imagination and vocabulary, so I don't regret spending so much time reading.

提案: Begin with a direct topic sentence, then explain the change with a short reason and contrast using linking words (e.g., however, but). Keep it concise and natural.

例: Yes, I've been reading since childhood. However, I don't have as much free time now because of work and studies, so I mostly read short articles or audiobooks when commuting.

提案: Answer directly, use specific details and a linking phrase to explain frequency or reason. Avoid repetitive wording and clarify who participates.

例: Yes, my family and I enjoy walking together in the local park. For example, we usually walk after dinner almost every evening to talk and relax, which helps us stay close and active.

× Yes, my hobbies are always related to sports.

✓ Yes, my hobbies are usually related to sports.

'Always' is an adverb meaning at all times; it is unlikely the speaker's hobbies are literally always sports. 'Usually' better fits to express frequency. Use adverbs of frequency that match intended meaning (always, usually, often, sometimes).

× And also I would like to go outside for hiking sometimes.

✓ I would also like to go hiking sometimes.

Beginning a sentence with 'And also' is redundant and informal. 'Go outside for hiking' is wordy; English commonly uses 'go hiking'. Place 'also' before the main verb for natural word order.

× Yes, when I was a child I used to love reading.

✓ Yes, when I was a child I used to love reading.

No change needed; sentence correctly uses 'used to' to describe a past habitual action. Included here only to confirm correctness.

× I loved reading so much that I even got short sighted.

✓ I loved reading so much that I even became short-sighted.

'Got short sighted' is informal and lacks hyphenation. Use 'became short-sighted' or 'developed short-sightedness' for standard phrasing; hyphenate 'short-sighted' when used as a compound adjective.

× It was really a miserable thing, but I didn't regret it because reading helps me a lot.

✓ It was really unfortunate, but I didn't regret it because reading helped me a lot.

'Miserable thing' is awkward; 'unfortunate' or 'a regrettable consequence' is more natural. Tense consistency: main clause uses past 'was' and 'didn't regret', so reason clause should use past 'helped' if referring to that time. If speaker means reading continues to help now, keep present 'helps'. Clarify intended time reference.

× Yes, reading is such a hobby that I have had since my childhood, but nowadays reading is not a really leisure for me and I cannot spare much time for reading as I used to because there are so many things to do.

✓ Yes, reading is a hobby I have had since childhood, but nowadays reading is not really a leisure activity for me and I cannot spare as much time for reading as I used to because there are so many other things to do.

Remove unnecessary 'such' and 'my' before 'childhood'; use 'a hobby I have had since childhood' for natural phrasing. 'Not a really leisure' is incorrect—'leisure' is a noun; use 'a leisure activity' or 'leisure time'. Add 'other' to clarify additional activities. Reorder 'as much time' for correct comparative structure.

× Yes, my parents and I always like to take a walk in the natural park.

✓ Yes, my parents and I always like to take walks in the nature park.

'Take a walk' is acceptable, but with 'always' and habitual action, plural 'take walks' is more natural. 'Natural park' is uncommon in English; 'nature park' or 'national park' depends on meaning. Choose the correct noun; here 'nature park' fits best.

× Since I was a little child, we have always been wandering outside after lunch or dinner to take a walk and talk with each one.

✓ Since I was a little child, we have always wandered outside after lunch or dinner to take a walk and talk with each other.

'Have always been wandering' implies continuous action; 'have always wandered' better expresses habitual action since childhood. 'Talk with each one' is incorrect; use 'talk with each other' to indicate conversation among the group. Maintain consistent tense: present perfect for a habit continuing to present is appropriate.