Hobby— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Reduce fillers (uh, umm, well), correct sentence fragments, and organize into a clear topic sentence plus supporting detail. Keep answers within 3–4 concise sentences and use linking words (for example, because, and, also) to connect ideas. Add a brief example or result to make it specific (e.g., a recent exhibition and how it inspired you).

例: I enjoy visiting exhibitions and art galleries because I major in graphic design and they give me creative inspiration. For example, a recent contemporary design show inspired a poster idea I used for a class project. I also run in the morning to stay fit and clear my mind.

提案: Avoid hesitations and tense errors; use past simple consistently. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give specific examples and a brief reason or memory. Use linking words such as for example, with, or because to make the answer coherent.

例: Yes. When I was a child I enjoyed outdoor activities, especially badminton and tennis. For example, I often played badminton with my parents at the local park, which helped me stay active and build teamwork skills.

提案: Be careful with word choice, verb forms and redundancy (e.g., 'got interested' vs 'became interested'). Use one clear topic sentence, then give specific supporting details and a brief example of what you still do now. Correct simple grammar (e.g., 'I used to paint and draw in my notebook' and 'I still maintain this hobby').

例: Yes. I became interested in art and design as a child, so I used to paint and draw in my notebooks. I still sketch every week and recently created a digital poster for a student exhibition, which shows how I’ve kept improving my skills.

提案: Finish your sentences and avoid repeating fillers. Use contrast linking words correctly (however, although, but). Provide a complete explanation and one example of a difference and a small conclusion. Fix grammar (e.g., 'my family members usually enjoy sports' and 'I'm quite an introverted person').

例: Not really. My family members usually enjoy sports to improve their fitness, but I am more introverted and prefer visiting galleries. However, when I want to improve my stamina I go for regular morning runs. This difference reflects our different interests and routines.

× Yes, definitely I have, well, uh, my hobby is visiting exhibitions and art galleries.

✓ Yes, definitely I do. Well, my hobby is visiting exhibitions and art galleries.

Speaker used 'I have' awkwardly to respond to 'Do you have any hobbies?' The correct short response uses the auxiliary do: 'I do.' Use of 'I have' is not wrong grammatically but sounds unnatural here; replace with 'I do' for natural spoken English.

× It. This is mainly because, umm, I major in graphic design, so I can get a lot of inspiration from numerous artworks made by famous artists or designers.

✓ This is mainly because I major in graphic design, so I can get a lot of inspiration from artworks by famous artists and designers.

Fragment 'It.' is a sentence structure error; remove the fragment and combine into one sentence. Also simplify 'numerous artworks made by' to 'artworks by' for concision and natural phrasing.

× In addition, I tend to go for a run in the morning.

✓ In addition, I tend to go for a run in the mornings.

Use plural 'mornings' to indicate a habitual action. 'Tend to' with a habitual time expression usually pairs with the plural form when implying repeated occurrences.

× Yes, of course, uh, when I was a child, my hobby was umm, outdoor activities and sports like badminton and tennis.

✓ Yes, of course. When I was a child, my hobbies were outdoor activities and sports like badminton and tennis.

Singular/plural and article issues: 'my hobby was outdoor activities' mixes singular 'hobby' with plural activities. Change to plural 'hobbies' and 'were' for correct subject-verb agreement.

× Umm, So I, I tended to umm, played outdoor activities with my family umm, in addition.

✓ So I tended to play outdoor games and activities with my family.

Incorrect verb form: after 'tended to' use the base form 'play', not past 'played.' Also streamline 'outdoor activities' to 'outdoor games and activities' and remove filler words.

× Yes, I have. Well when I was a child I got interested in, I became interested in the arts and design.

✓ Yes, I have. Well, when I was a child I became interested in art and design.

Redundancy: 'got interested in, I became interested in' repeats the same idea. Use one correct past tense phrase 'became interested in.' Use 'art and design' (uncountable) rather than 'the arts and design' for natural phrasing.

× So I used to paint and Draw Something on my note and I still maintain that hobby until now.

✓ So I used to paint and draw on my notebook, and I have continued that hobby until now.

Errors include incorrect capitalization 'Draw Something', awkward phrase 'on my note', and tense mismatch 'used to' with 'still maintain ... until now.' Use 'used to' for past habit and present perfect 'have continued' to show continuation to present. Use 'draw' (base form) after 'and' and 'notebook' for intended meaning.

× And I think it is really interest.

✓ And I think it is really interesting.

Incorrect word form: 'interest' is a noun; the correct adjective is 'interesting' to describe something that interests the speaker.

× Not really. Well my family member usually enjoy the sports to improve their stamina and physical health.

✓ Not really. Well, my family members usually enjoy sports to improve their stamina and physical health.

Singular/plural pronoun mismatch: 'my family member' should be plural 'my family members' to match plural 'their.' Also 'enjoy the sports' is unnatural; use 'enjoy sports' without the definite article.

× However umm I don't like the sports that much because I'm quite umm introverted person.

✓ However, I don't like sports that much because I'm quite an introverted person.

Missing article: 'introverted person' needs 'an.' Also remove 'the' before 'sports' for general statement and add commas for clarity.

× Well however if I want to improve my stamina, I.

✓ However, if I want to improve my stamina, I would try to exercise more regularly.

Fragmentary sentence: 'I.' is incomplete. Provide a complete clause to finish the thought. Use conditional 'would try' to express hypothetical intention. Replace filler with a clear, complete verb phrase.