Walking— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 句子不够流畅，有重复和语法错误（如时态和词形）。回答需要更直接的主题句和清晰的支持细节，句子数量保持在3-4句内，同时用连词连接观点。可改进发音停顿，避免频繁使用填充词“uh”。

例: Yes, I walk a lot because my dormitory is within walking distance of my classroom. Walking saves me time and gives me regular exercise, which helps me stay fit. I enjoy it because it clears my mind before lessons.

提案: 回答含糊且有很多重复与语法错误（动词形式、代词和句子结构）。应先用一句话直接回答，再用1-2句具体例子或结果，使用连词如“and”或“which”保持连贯。避免不明词汇（如CLO）和重复短语。

例: Yes, my parents often took me hiking when I was a child. These trips refreshed me and gave me chances to challenge myself by climbing steep trails. I still remember enjoying the fresh air and the sense of achievement.

提案: 内容合理但表达不够简洁，存在语法错误和冗余（如重复表达“refresh”）。需要一句主题句并用具体原因支持，使用连接词（for example, so）并注意词序和名词单复数。

例: People like walking in parks because they provide a peaceful escape from city life. The greenery and fresh air help visitors relax, and open paths offer space to exercise or think quietly.

提案: 语法和词汇使用不准确（如“its full of”应为“it's full of”或“it is full of”，不明确的词汇“mechanic planes”）。回答应简明：先说地点，再用1-2句具体原因并举例，避免无意义填充词。

例: I would love to take a long walk along the Yangtze riverside in Chongqing. The scenic views, varied architecture and riverside paths make walks interesting, and the skyline is especially striking at sunset.

提案: 回答有时态错误和重复（两次说“I remember”），以及词汇拼写问题（如“softy”）。建议用过去时描述经历，第一句直接回答地点和时间，接着用具体细节说明感受，避免重复。

例: Last weekend I walked along the Yangtze riverside in Chongqing with my friends. We enjoyed the beautiful scenery and diverse skyscrapers, and the gentle breeze made the walk very relaxing.

× Yes, because of the dormitory to my classroom is within walk, walk distance.

✓ Yes, because the dormitory is within walking distance of my classroom.

句子结构混乱，原句多余介词短语且词序错误。应把主语(dormitory)与系动词(is)连用，用短语 "within walking distance of" 表示“在……的步行范围内”。建议记住固定搭配“within walking distance of ...”。

× So I always uh, walking to my classroom, which not only saves me a lot of time, but also, uh, strengthen my muscle and keep, keep me fit.

✓ So I always walk to my classroom, which not only saves me a lot of time, but also strengthens my muscles and keeps me fit.

动词形式错误：句子主语是‘I’，应使用一般现在时动词walk而非现在分词walking；从句中主语是单数第三人称 (which 指代 walking to my classroom 整体，应作单数)，动词应为第三人称单数形式strengthens和keeps；muscle应为复数musc les。建议复习主句与从句的主谓一致和第三人称单数变化。

× I remember that my parents always brings me to uh, go hike and CLO and go and climb mountains outside, which cannot only helps me refresh and give me gives me a lot of opportunity to challenge myself and I really enjoy working and it has it has been.

✓ I remember that my parents always brought me to go hiking and climb mountains outside, which not only helped me refresh and gave me a lot of opportunities to challenge myself. I really enjoyed it.

时态和主谓不一致：因为是回忆过去，应使用一般过去时(brought, helped, gave, enjoyed)；parents为复数，不能用brings；短语应为 go hiking 或 go and climb 改为 go hiking and climb 或 to go hiking and climb，且opportunity需用复数 opportunities；句子过长且重复，应拆分为两个完整句子。建议练习过去时规则变化和句子简洁表达。

× Yes, I remember that my parents always brings me to uh, go hike and CLO and go and climb mountains outside, which cannot only helps me refresh and give me gives me a lot of opportunity to challenge myself and I really enjoy working and it has it has been.

✓ I remember that my parents always brought me to go hiking and climb mountains outside, which not only helped me refresh and gave me a lot of opportunities to challenge myself. I really enjoyed it.

代词和指代不清：原句中的which指代不明确且导致动词形式选择错误。修正后使which清晰指代前述活动，并调整动词以与过去时一致。建议注意which指代整个前述短语或句子时作为单数处理。

× Well because the parks often nearby the tall buildings and give people a way to recharge and escape from the hustle and bustle of the real life and the green trees and bushes give them helps them to refresh and make them eyes re relaxed.

✓ Well, parks are often near tall buildings and give people a way to recharge and escape from the hustle and bustle of real life. The green trees and bushes help them relax their eyes.

介词和短语使用错误：应使用be near 而不是 often nearby；escape from the hustle and bustle of real life 不需要定冠词the；短语“give them helps them to refresh”重复且不自然，改为 help them relax their eyes 更简洁。建议学习常用介词搭配和避免重复表达。

× Well, I really prefer to walk along the river in Chongqing city because of its full of uh, landscapes and mechanic umm planes and climbs which give me a lot of fun when walking and I always enjoy the skyscrapers.

✓ Well, I really prefer to walk along the river in Chongqing because it is full of landscapes, man-made planes and cliffs which make walking fun, and I always enjoy the skyscrapers.

冠词和词语搭配错误：city后面通常不用与城市名连用（Chongqing city可简化为 Chongqing）；表达“it is full of”应完整写出；原文的 mechanic planes likely 用词错误，猜测想说 man-made places 或 plains/cliffs，改为 man-made places 或 cliffs 更合适；make walking fun 比 give me a lot of fun 更自然；建议核对词汇拼写并注意固定结构“be full of”。

× I remember last time it was when I go along the Yangtze Riverside in Chongqing with my friends.

✓ I remember the last time was when I went along the Yangtze Riverside in Chongqing with my friends.

时态错误：既然在回忆过去，应使用过去时 went 而不是 go；另外可调整词序使句子更自然。建议复习过去时动词变化并注意时间副词搭配。

× I remember that I really enjoyed the beautiful landscapes, the variety skyscrapers and enjoy the softy breeze that really make me relaxed.

✓ I really enjoyed the beautiful landscapes, the variety of skyscrapers, and the soft breeze that really made me feel relaxed.

形容词/副词和搭配错误：variety skyscrapers 应为 variety of skyscrapers；softy 不是正确拼写，应为 soft；动词时态与主句过去时一致，make 改为 made；并用 feel 使表达更自然。建议注意名词短语搭配（variety of）和形容词拼写。