Walking— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be direct and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence (e.g. “Yes, I walk regularly.”), avoid repetition and filler (uh), correct small grammar errors (e.g. 'so healthy habit' -> 'a very healthy habit') and keep to 2–3 supporting sentences with specific reasons or an example.

例: Yes, I walk regularly, usually for 30 minutes a day. I find it a very healthy habit because it improves my breathing and helps me relax after work. For example, I take a brisk walk around my neighbourhood every evening to clear my mind.

提案: Use correct verb forms and a clear structure: topic sentence + one or two supporting details. Avoid adding unnecessary words like 'literally' when not needed. Give a specific memory or example to make the answer vivid.

例: Yes, walking and playing outside was my favourite hobby as a child. I often played in the neighbourhood park with my friends, climbing trees and running games, which made me very active and happy.

提案: Begin with a clear general statement, then give 2–3 specific reasons using linking words (for example, because, also, moreover). Correct collocations ('fresh air' not 'very good air') and avoid listing without cohesion.

例: People like walking in parks because they offer a peaceful, natural environment. For example, parks have many trees and flowers, so the air feels fresher, and there are often benches and paths ideal for socialising. Also, many couples find parks romantic, so they enjoy walking there on dates.

提案: Use conditional correctly (would rather than 'will accept') and be specific about the place. Avoid repetition and unclear phrasing ('work a lot' unclear). Provide one clear reason why and an example of the route or companion.

例: If I had the chance, I would take a long walk along the seaside with my boyfriend. I think a coastal promenade would be romantic and relaxing, and we'd enjoy watching the sunset while walking together.

提案: Use correct past tense and natural phrases (e.g. 'I went for a walk in the park near my house'). Give 2–3 specific sensory details (sounds, sights) and avoid vague or incorrect phrases ('birds think'). Keep it concise and coherent.

例: Lately I went for a walk in the small park near my house. I remember hearing birds singing and seeing new buds on the trees — it felt charming because it was the start of spring and quite peaceful.

× Yes, I work a lot. I find it the so healthy habit and in my opinion it can be helpful for our lungs 'cause when you're walking, you're breathing, uh, clean. Air and it can be so helpful.

✓ Yes, I walk a lot. I find it a very healthy habit, and in my opinion it can be helpful for our lungs because when you walk, you breathe clean air and it can be very helpful.

Errors: incorrect verb choice 'work' instead of 'walk' for the activity; unnatural article and word order 'the so healthy habit' should be 'a very healthy habit'; use of contraction 'cause' and colloquial filler 'uh' inappropriate in formal correction; sentence fragments and unnecessary periods. Suggestions: use the simple present 'I walk' for habitual actions, use 'a' with singular countable noun 'habit', use adverb 'very' before adjective, replace 'when you're walking, you're breathing' with 'when you walk, you breathe' for clearer present habitual meaning, and use 'because' instead of 'cause'.

× Yes, it's literally was my hobby. I was go outside when I was a child so much and it was very interesting for me because I was a little girl and I wanted to play with my friends.

✓ Yes, it was literally my hobby. I went outside a lot when I was a child and it was very interesting for me because I was a little girl and I wanted to play with my friends.

Errors: incorrect auxiliary usage 'it's literally was' mixes present and past; wrong verb form 'was go' instead of past 'went'; awkward adverb placement 'so much' should be 'a lot'. Suggestions: use past simple consistently for past habits ('it was', 'I went'), place adverbs like 'a lot' after the verb, and avoid redundant words 'literally' unless needed.

× In parks we can see many trees, many entertainments and many people prefer to take a date in parks and in my opinion it is so romantic place and when you are walking nearby trees or plants, you are breathing a very good air.

✓ In parks we can see many trees and different activities, and many people prefer to go on dates in parks. In my opinion it is a very romantic place, and when you walk near trees or plants, you breathe fresh air.

Errors: 'many entertainments' is not natural; 'take a date' is incorrect verb phrase—use 'go on dates'; missing article before 'romantic place' and wrong adjective order; 'walking nearby trees' should be 'walk near trees'; 'a very good air' is incorrect—use 'fresh air' without article. Suggestions: use natural collocations ('activities', 'go on dates'), include articles where needed ('a very romantic place'), and use 'near' for proximity. Use 'fresh air' as the common collocation.

× If I had a chance to take a long walk, I will accept that. And I prefer to work a lot with my boyfriend. 'Cause I find it so romantic, it's like a date.

✓ If I had the chance to take a long walk, I would accept it. I would prefer to walk a lot with my boyfriend because I find it very romantic; it's like a date.

Errors: conditional structure wrong—mixes second conditional condition with 'will' instead of 'would'; 'accept that' is unnatural for taking a walk—use 'accept it'; 'prefer to work a lot' uses wrong verb 'work' instead of 'walk'; informal 'cause' should be 'because'; punctuation needs fixing. Suggestions: use 'would' in the result clause for unreal present ('If I had... I would...'), use correct verbs ('walk'), and use 'prefer to' + verb to express preference.

× Lately I went down for a walk in the nearby park from my house and it was so inspiring walking. I remember the birds think and it was so charming and it was the start of the spring and it was a romantic.

✓ Recently I went for a walk in the park near my house and it was very inspiring. I remember the birds singing and it was charming; it was the start of spring and it felt romantic.

Errors: 'lately' is acceptable but 'recently' is more natural with past simple; 'went down for a walk' is awkward—use 'went for a walk'; 'nearby park from my house' incorrect preposition order—use 'the park near my house'; 'inspiring walking' should be 'very inspiring'; 'birds think' is wrong verb—use 'birds singing'; unnecessary article in 'the start of the spring' remove 'the' before seasons; 'it was a romantic' needs noun 'moment' or adjective 'felt romantic'. Suggestions: use natural past expressions, correct verb forms for sensory verbs ('singing'), arrange prepositions properly, and complete adjectives with nouns or use 'felt' for states.