Food— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Correct the grammar and be more specific. Use a clear topic sentence, correct verb forms and a concise description. Avoid redundancy and keep it to 1–2 sentences. Add a short reason or detail using a linking word.

例: I love a traditional Scottish breakfast with eggs and sausages. I especially enjoy it because the sausage has a rich, savory flavor and the eggs are usually cooked to runny perfection, which makes the meal very satisfying.

提案: Be direct and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence about your childhood preferences, then add one or two specific examples. Remove fillers and unclear phrases, and use linking words for coherence.

例: When I was young, I liked sweet breakfast foods. For example, I often ate milk with cereal and flavored yogurts because they were quick and tasty.

提案: Make sentences grammatically correct and more specific. Use linking words and avoid repetition. Give clearer examples of seasonal foods and explain briefly why you prefer them.

例: Yes, I eat different foods depending on the season. For example, in summer I often eat fresh berries and salads because they are refreshing, whereas in winter I prefer citrus fruits like oranges and hearty dishes because they feel warming and nutritious.

提案: Use a clear comparative structure and correct nouns/plural forms. State the change directly, then give specific examples and a brief reason using a linking word like 'because' or 'so'. Avoid fillers.

例: My favourite foods have changed somewhat: now I prefer simpler, healthier options such as broccoli and salads. This is because I try to eat more vegetables for health reasons, whereas as a child I mainly liked sweeter foods.

× I'm a big fan of breakfast. I absolutely in love with this Scotland breakfast with eggs and sausages.

✓ I'm a big fan of breakfast. I absolutely love this Scottish breakfast with eggs and sausages.

The phrase 'absolutely in love with' is missing the verb 'am' or should be 'absolutely love'. Here 'absolutely love' fits the simple present expressing a general preference. 'Scotland breakfast' is incorrect adjective form; use the adjective 'Scottish' to describe something from Scotland. Suggestion: use 'I absolutely love' or 'I am absolutely in love with' and use 'Scottish' as the adjective.

× I tend to believe that every child loves, uh, any sweet savory food and I was that one who loved, umm, breakfasts, uh, mix like milk and cereals and any yogurts.

✓ I tend to believe that every child loves sweet and savory foods, and I was one of those who loved breakfasts mixed with milk and cereal and yogurts.

Several issues: 'any' is incorrectly used with 'sweet savory food'—use plural 'sweet and savory foods' to express category. 'I was that one who' is awkward; 'I was one of those who' is natural. 'breakfasts, mix like milk and cereals' should be 'breakfasts mixed with milk and cereal'—use past participle 'mixed' to modify breakfasts and 'cereal' as an uncountable or singular noun. Also pluralize 'yogurts' or use 'yogurt' consistently; here 'yogurts' is acceptable. Suggestion: simplify and use plural nouns and proper modifiers.

× I think that different times of the year influence on the kind of food we can eat.

✓ I think that different times of the year influence the kind of food we can eat.

The verb 'influence' does not take the preposition 'on' when followed by a direct object; use 'influence' + noun phrase. Remove 'on'. Suggestion: use 'influence the kind of food' or 'have an influence on the kinds of food'.

× For example, in the summer season it's more likely I will eat some berries or fruits, and in the in the winter season I prefer oranges and some savory food.

✓ For example, in summer I'm more likely to eat berries or fruit, and in winter I prefer oranges and savory foods.

Tense and wording: 'it's more likely I will eat' is awkward; use 'I'm more likely to eat' for habitual present. 'summer season' and 'winter season' are wordy; 'summer' and 'winter' suffice. 'berries or fruits' — use 'berries or fruit' (fruit uncountable) or 'fruits' if emphasizing types. 'some savory food' should be plural 'savory foods' to match general preference. Suggestion: use natural present habitual phrasing and correct noun number.

× The changing is not that huge, but now I prefer uh, easier food like some broccolis, uh, or any salads.

✓ The change is not that big, but now I prefer easier foods like broccoli or salads.

Use noun 'change' not 'changing' to refer to a change in preference. 'Not that huge' is colloquial; 'not that big' or 'not very significant' is better. 'easier food' should be 'easier foods' or 'simpler foods'. 'broccolis' is incorrect pluralization; 'broccoli' is uncountable. 'any salads' is odd; use 'salads'. Suggestion: use 'change', correct noun forms, and pluralize appropriately.

× But in my childhood I was a big fan of more sweet food.

✓ But in my childhood I was a big fan of sweeter foods.

'More sweet food' is incorrect comparative form; use 'sweeter foods' to compare past preference. Also plural 'foods' fits general category. Suggestion: use comparative adjective 'sweeter' and plural noun when speaking generally.