Food— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and grammatically complete: start with a clear topic sentence, avoid fillers (uh), correct grammar (e.g., 'it is really sweet'), and add one specific supporting detail using a linking word. Keep to no more than 3–4 sentences.

例: My favourite food is strawberry cake. I love it because the sponge is light and the fresh strawberries add a sweet, slightly tart flavour. Also, many of my friends enjoy it, so we often share it at celebrations.

提案: Provide a complete topic sentence and avoid short fragments. Use past tense consistently when talking about childhood, and give a specific example of a dish with a brief reason using a linking word.

例: When I was young, I liked the meals my mother cooked. For example, she often made braised chicken with rice, which I loved because it was comforting and full of flavour.

提案: Organise your answer with a clear topic sentence, use linking words (for example, in spring/in summer), and give specific examples for two seasons. Avoid vague endings like 'and so on.'

例: Yes, I change my diet with the seasons. For example, in spring I eat fresh cucumbers and green beans because they are crisp and refreshing, while in summer I often eat watermelon to stay hydrated.

提案: Use past tense for childhood and present tense for now; avoid fillers and fragments. Give a concise contrast with a linking word (e.g., 'but' or 'however') and a specific example of the healthy food you now prefer.

例: Yes, it has changed. As a child I loved sugary cupcakes, but now I prefer healthier options such as fruit salads and whole-grain snacks because they make me feel more energetic.

× My favorite food is strawberry cakes, which is quite iconic among my friends and uh, I think that's the reason why people adore it because it really sweet and.

✓ My favorite food is strawberry cake, which is quite iconic among my friends, and I think that's why people adore it because it is really sweet.

The issues: 'strawberry cakes' should be singular 'strawberry cake' when referring to the type of food (Singular/plural and article usage); 'it really sweet' lacks the verb 'is' (sentence without a verb / verb missing). Also remove filler 'uh' and fix punctuation and conjunction usage. Suggestion: Use complete clause 'it is really sweet' and keep noun number consistent. Grammar types involved: 1 and 23, but correction limited to adjective/adverb and sentence completeness.

× When I was young, I like. The food my mother cooked for me, I think my mother's food is the most delicious food in the world. Yes.

✓ When I was young, I liked the food my mother cooked for me; I think my mother's food was the most delicious in the world.

Tense consistency error: 'When I was young' sets past time, so main verb should be past tense 'liked' rather than present 'like'. Also combine fragments into a single coherent sentence and match past evaluation with 'was'. Suggestion: Use past tense throughout descriptions of childhood experiences and avoid sentence fragments.

× Yes, I usually eat food depending on seasons like spring I would like to eat cucumbers, beans, in summer I like eating watermelons and so on.

✓ Yes, I usually eat different foods depending on the season: in spring I like to eat cucumbers and beans; in summer I like to eat watermelons and so on.

Preposition and article errors: use 'depending on the season' (singular) or 'depending on seasons' with 'the' omitted; clearer to say 'depending on the season'. Also parallel structure: use 'in spring' and 'in summer' with consistent verb forms 'I like to eat' or 'I like eating'. Suggestion: Keep parallel phrasing and include articles where needed, and separate clauses with punctuation for clarity.

× Yes, when I was a child, I like cakes. Umm, cupcakes. Something really sweet and incredible sugar in it. But uh, as I grow up, I prefer healthy food.

✓ Yes, when I was a child, I liked cakes, especially cupcakes, which were very sweet and had a lot of sugar in them. But as I grew up, I preferred healthier food.

Tense inconsistency: childhood actions require past tense 'liked' and 'had'; the phrase 'as I grow up' should be past 'as I grew up' to match narrative. Also 'incredible sugar in it' is ungrammatical; use 'had a lot of sugar in them' or 'were very sugary'. Suggestion: Maintain past tense for past habits and use full clauses instead of fragments; use comparative 'healthier' when comparing past and present preferences.