Food— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be concise and avoid repetition; start with a clear topic sentence, then give two specific supporting details using linking words. Mention taste and ingredients succinctly and add a brief personal reason. Keep to no more than 4–5 sentences.

例: My favourite food is Bicol Express, a spicy Bicolano dish. It has a creamy coconut milk base and lots of chili, which I love because I enjoy bold, spicy flavours. I also like its rich, oily texture that makes it especially satisfying.

提案: Use correct tense and be more concise. Start with a clear topic sentence in the past tense, then add a specific sensory detail and a short reason with a linking word. Avoid repeating words like "really."

例: When I was young, I loved sinigang. Whenever it rained, our maid would make the hot, tangy soup, which felt comforting and warming. Because of that association, sinigang reminds me of childhood and rainy days.

提案: Provide a clear structure and complete examples; avoid filler words like "like" and "umm." Use linking words (for example, whereas) to contrast occasions, and finish the list or use "etc." to avoid trailing off. Aim for specific typical dishes and one short reason why they differ.

例: Yes, we eat different foods for different occasions. For example, during a Fiesta, we typically serve menudo, pancit and lechon because they feed many guests. In contrast, at birthdays we usually have spaghetti and hot dogs with marshmallows, which are more kid-friendly and festive.

提案: Be direct and avoid vague phrasing. Start with a clear topic sentence saying whether it changed, then briefly explain with a concrete example of a new dish you like and a linking word to show contrast. Keep sentences short and specific.

例: My favourite foods haven't changed much; I still enjoy the dishes I loved as a child. However, as I've grown older I've tried many new cuisines, such as Korean barbecue and sushi, so I now like a wider variety of foods.

× Bicol Express just really hit hits that spot.

✓ Bicol Express just really hits that spot.

The verb is referring to 'Bicol Express' (third person singular), so the correct present simple form is 'hits'. Remove the extra 'hit'. Suggestion: use 'hits' for third person singular subjects.

× I love sinigang growing up because our maid would make sinigang every time it was raining and so the hot soup would really just complement the weather and it would just really be comforting and very delicious.

✓ I loved sinigang while growing up because our maid would make it whenever it rained, so the hot soup really complemented the weather and was comforting and delicious.

The sentence mixes present and past tenses. 'Growing up' refers to the past, so use past tense 'loved' and 'rained'; keep 'would make' to indicate habitual past. Also replace 'every time it was raining' with 'whenever it rained' for natural past reference, and simplify repeated adverbs. Suggestion: keep tense consistent when referring to past habits.

× I love sinigang growing up because our maid would make sinigang every time it was raining and so the hot soup would really just complement the weather and it would just really be comforting and very delicious.

✓ I loved sinigang while growing up because our maid would make it whenever it rained, so the hot soup really complemented the weather and was comforting and delicious.

Using 'growing up' without a preposition is informal; 'while growing up' is clearer. 'Every time it was raining' is wordy—'whenever it rained' is more natural. Also use 'make it' to avoid repetition. Suggestion: use clear prepositional phrase 'while growing up' for past time reference.

× we usually eat like menudo, hot dog and pancit.

✓ we usually eat menudo, hot dog and pancit.

The filler 'like' is unnecessary and informal in this declarative sentence. Remove 'like' to make the statement grammatically clean. Suggestion: avoid using 'like' as a filler in formal descriptions.

× However, when there's like a birthday, we usually eat umm, hot dog with marshmallow, spaghetti and.

✓ However, for birthdays we usually eat hot dogs with marshmallows and spaghetti.

The original has fillers ('like', 'umm'), an incomplete list ending with 'and.', singular/plural mismatches ('hot dog' should be 'hot dogs' when referring to a typical party serving), and awkward preposition 'when there's...a birthday'. 'For birthdays' is more natural. Suggestion: remove fillers, ensure list completion, and match plurality.

× I feel like the food that I loved when I was young still remains today.

✓ I feel like the food I loved when I was young still remains my favorite today.

'Remains' needs an object to be clear; adding 'my favorite' clarifies meaning. Also streamline 'the food that I loved' to 'the food I loved'. Tense is present feeling about past preference, so keep 'feel' + past reference. Suggestion: provide a clear object after 'remains'.

× However, since I'm already older, I have already tried multiple dishes and so I feel like I just like a lot more dishes now.

✓ However, since I am older, I have tried many different dishes, so I feel that I like many more dishes now.

The original is repetitive ('already' twice, 'just like a lot more dishes' is informal and redundant). Use present perfect 'have tried' to indicate experiences up to now. Replace 'multiple' with 'many different' for naturalness and 'a lot more' with 'many more' for clarity. Suggestion: avoid redundant words and choose concise phrasing.