Food— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise, avoid repetition, use a clear topic sentence and give one or two specific examples with a short reason. Use linking words to connect ideas.

例: I really like Japanese food. For example, I often eat sushi and ramen because sushi is fresh and healthy, while ramen is comforting and flavorful.

提案: Answer directly with a clear topic sentence, reduce hesitations, and give a specific example and brief reason or memory to enrich the answer.

例: When I was young I loved sweet foods. For example, I used to eat ice cream almost every weekend because it was a special treat after school.

提案: Give a direct topic sentence, then provide specific seasonal examples and use linking words to make the answer coherent. Avoid vague phrases and hesitations.

例: Yes, I eat different foods during the year. For instance, in winter I prefer hot soups and stews, while in summer I eat lighter dishes like salads and cold noodles.

提案: Provide a clear contrast using linking words (e.g., 'when' and 'but') and avoid repetition. Give a brief reason for the change to make the answer specific.

例: Yes, my favourite food has changed. When I was a child I preferred sweets like ice cream and chocolate, but as I grew up I started enjoying sushi and grilled salmon because I appreciate healthier, more subtle flavours now.

× My favorite food is Japanese food, for example, like sashimi, salmon, salmon, fish and sushi or ramen. Uh, all of the Japanese food. I must like it.

✓ My favorite food is Japanese cuisine, for example sashimi, salmon, sushi or ramen. I really like all Japanese food.

Original uses repetitive and awkward word choices ('Japanese food', 'for example, like', repeated 'salmon') and an incorrect modal phrase 'I must like it.' Replace with more natural nouns and adverb 'really' to express preference. Remove duplicates and unnecessary fillers. Suggestion: use precise nouns (cuisine, sashimi) and adverbs (really) to modify 'like'.

× When I was young, maybe I really like kind of food, uh, sweet food, I guess, for example, like ice cream or something sweet like that.

✓ When I was young, I really liked sweet foods, for example ice cream or other sweets.

The sentence mixes past time reference 'When I was young' with present tense 'like'. Use past tense 'liked'. Also pluralize 'sweets' or 'sweet foods' for generality and remove fillers 'maybe, uh, I guess'. Suggestion: match verb tense to time adverbials and simplify phrasing.

× Of course I try a whole of food because I eat whenever I want and whatever I can. So umm, I usually eat different foods at different time of the year.

✓ Of course I try a whole range of foods because I eat whenever I want and whatever I can. So, I usually eat different foods at different times of the year.

Original has wrong phrase 'a whole of food' and singular 'time' where plural 'times' is needed. Use 'a whole range of foods' or 'a wide variety of foods'. Also pluralize 'times' when referring to multiple occasions during the year. Suggestion: use standard collocations ('a wide variety of', 'different times of the year').

× Yes because when I was young I rather like to eat some kids food, example ice cream or chocolate something like that.

✓ Yes, because when I was young I rather liked to eat some kids' food, for example ice cream or chocolate.

Again 'when I was young' requires past tense 'liked' not present 'like'. Also 'kids food' should be possessive 'kids' food' or better 'children's food'. Remove 'something like that' to be concise. Suggestion: maintain past tense and use correct noun form for children's food.

× But when I was grow up, when I was grow up I changed my favorite food to real food like sushi or salmon food.

✓ But when I grew up, I changed my favourite foods to more substantial dishes like sushi or salmon.

Incorrect verb form 'was grow up' should be past simple 'grew up'. 'Changed my favorite food to real food' is awkward; use 'changed my favourite foods to more substantial dishes'. Also 'salmon food' is unnatural; use 'salmon' or 'salmon dishes'. Suggestion: use correct past simple verb and natural collocations ('grew up', 'substantial dishes', 'sushi').