Building— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be concise, use correct grammar and a clear topic sentence. Start with a direct answer, correct article/noun usage and prepositions, and avoid repetition. Add one specific supporting detail using a linking word.

例: No, there aren’t any tall buildings near my home because I live in a riverside village about 30 minutes from the city. For example, the tallest structures here are two‑storey houses and a small church, so the skyline is mostly low and open.

提案: Give a clear, natural topic sentence then add a specific reason with a linking word. Correct noun forms and comparative phrases. Keep it within 2–4 sentences.

例: Not really. I prefer photographing natural scenery because I find landscapes more inspiring than architecture. For instance, I often take photos of river sunsets and wooded paths when I go hiking.

提案: Answer directly, use the correct name and article, and give a specific reason with coherent linking words. Avoid tense errors and redundancy. Offer one concrete detail about what you want to see.

例: Yes, I would love to visit the Eiffel Tower in Paris because the views from the top are famous worldwide. For example, I want to see the panoramic cityscape and photograph the Seine and historic rooftops at sunset.

提案: Start with a direct statement, then give specific, grammatical reasons using linking words. Correct word choice (e.g., ‘requires’, ‘elevator’, ‘takes time’) and avoid fillers. Provide one clear example to support your view.

例: No, I wouldn’t want to live in a tall building because it often requires more time to get in and out, especially during busy hours. For example, waiting for the elevator can add 10–15 minutes to my commute, which would be inconvenient daily.

× No, there is none tall buildings near my home because my home is actually located at at a Riverville areas which is far from the cities.

✓ No, there are no tall buildings near my home because my home is actually located in a Riverville area which is far from the cities.

The sentence uses singular 'is' with plural 'buildings' and incorrect quantifier 'none' before a noun; use 'there are no' for plural. 'At at' is a typographical error and the correct preposition is 'in' for locations. 'Areas' should be singular 'area' to match 'a Riverville area.' Suggestion: use 'there are no tall buildings' and 'located in a Riverville area.'

× No, not really. I don't like taking photos of buildings because I enjoy taking photo of breathtaking scenery compared to the buildings.

✓ No, not really. I don't like taking photos of buildings because I enjoy taking photos of breathtaking scenery more than of buildings.

Use plural 'photos' to match noun and maintain parallel structure: 'taking photos of breathtaking scenery' and 'taking photos of buildings.' Also replace 'compared to the buildings' with 'more than of buildings' or 'rather than buildings' to express preference. Suggestion: keep parallel 'taking photos of X' and use 'more than' for comparison.

× A building that I would like to visit would definitely be Eiffel Tower located at the Paris.

✓ A building that I would like to visit is definitely the Eiffel Tower in Paris.

Proper nouns with well-known landmarks require the definite article 'the' (the Eiffel Tower). Use 'in Paris' not 'at the Paris.' Also simplify tense: 'is' fits better than 'would definitely be' for stating a preference. Suggestion: say 'the Eiffel Tower in Paris.'

× I want to visit there because I heard that the scenery at the building was is very beautiful.

✓ I want to visit there because I have heard that the scenery at the building is very beautiful.

Tense consistency: 'I heard' suggests past; combine with present relevance using present perfect 'I have heard.' The phrase had both 'was is' (typo). Use 'is' to describe a general present truth. Suggestion: use 'I have heard that ... is very beautiful.'

× I think that living in tall building required more stamina and also umm more commute time.

✓ I think that living in a tall building requires more stamina and also more commuting time.

Subject 'living in a tall building' is singular gerund phrase, so verb must be 'requires' (third person singular). 'Commute time' is better expressed as 'commuting time' or 'longer commute times.' Suggestion: use 'requires' and 'commuting time.'

× If you want to go to another place you would need to take a leave or using stair which consumed times.

✓ If you want to go to another place, you would need to take a leave or use the stairs, which consumes time.

Parallel structure: after 'would need to' use base verb 'use' not 'using.' 'Take a leave' is unnatural; consider 'take a day off' or 'take a leave' depending on context. 'Stairs' needs definite article 'the stairs.' 'Consumed times' is incorrect; use 'consumes time' (singular) or 'takes time.' Suggestion: maintain parallel verbs and correct noun phrases: 'take a day off or use the stairs, which takes a lot of time.'